When I was around 12, I was told I had a half-sister from my dad’s past—let’s call her Megan. (That’s a whole story if it’s own). We met through family, ended up at the same school, and became friends. We never acknowledged the “sister” thing directly, and my dad asked me not to say anything—he wasn’t sure if she knew. We would usually just tell people we had the same grandma.
We stayed friendly through school, and now in our late 20s, we have minimal contact—occasional messages, likes on social media, etc. A while back, she mentioned using a DNA testing service to learn more about her health and family history due to some medical concerns and wanting to learn more.
Out of curiosity, my mom asked if I could see her on mine (I’d done the same test). I couldn’t. She doesn’t show up—while all my other relatives do.
Later, my dad was catching up with an old friend who casually mentioned he might actually be Megan’s biological father. He recently found out, contacted Megan’s mom, and was shut down. She told him it would be devastating if Megan found out.
Now I’m stuck sitting with this knowledge: the girl I thought was my half-sister for most of my life… isn’t. My dad hasn’t been involved since she was a baby—her stepdad adopted her—but my grandmother always kept a close relationship with Megan’s mom and stayed involved, which caused tension for years.
Part of me wonders if my grandma knew the truth all along and used it to manipulate or guilt my dad. The whole situation makes me question who knew what, who I can actually trust, and how deeply this might affect Megan if (or when) she finds out.
Her biological father is open and eager to connect. It could give her answers—medical and personal. But it could also upend her world. I can’t even imagine how that would feel for her.
So… what would you do? Would you tell her? Stay out of it? I feel like I’m stuck in the middle of a secret that’s not mine, but one that directly affects someone I care about.
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Backup of the post’s body: When I was around 12, I was told I had a half-sister from my dad’s past—let’s call her Megan. (That’s a whole story if it’s own). We met through family, ended up at the same school, and became friends. We never acknowledged the “sister” thing directly, and my dad asked me not to say anything—he wasn’t sure if she knew. We would usually just tell people we had the same grandma.
We stayed friendly through school, and now in our late 20s, we have minimal contact—occasional messages, likes on social media, etc. A while back, she mentioned using a DNA testing service to learn more about her health and family history due to some medical concerns and wanting to learn more.
Out of curiosity, my mom asked if I could see her on mine (I’d done the same test). I couldn’t. She doesn’t show up—while all my other relatives do.
Later, my dad was catching up with an old friend who casually mentioned he might actually be Megan’s biological father. He recently found out, contacted Megan’s mom, and was shut down. She told him it would be devastating if Megan found out.
Now I’m stuck sitting with this knowledge: the girl I thought was my half-sister for most of my life… isn’t. My dad hasn’t been involved since she was a baby—her stepdad adopted her—but my grandmother always kept a close relationship with Megan’s mom and stayed involved, which caused tension for years.
Part of me wonders if my grandma knew the truth all along and used it to manipulate or guilt my dad. The whole situation makes me question who knew what, who I can actually trust, and how deeply this might affect Megan if (or when) she finds out.
Her biological father is open and eager to connect. It could give her answers—medical and personal. But it could also upend her world. I can’t even imagine how that would feel for her.
So… what would you do? Would you tell her? Stay out of it? I feel like I’m stuck in the middle of a secret that’s not mine, but one that directly affects someone I care about.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Tell her she will find out anyways better come from you then someone else