Made this burner because I am in desperate need of advice.
Im not going to get into the whole situation because there is a lot but basically I was set up by my mother with this couple (M32) (F24) when I was 15. So essentially groomed with the approval of my mother. my mother went to do her own thing and left me in this relationship and only re-entered my life a year or two ago. i had my daughter at 17 after this
I started to question the nature or our relationship a lot as I got older, I’m 21 now and I thought about what I would want for my daughter and really understood how young I was at 15.
The relationship was never very stable and was very toxic. This only got worse once I questioned the man in this relationship and began actually sticking up for myself and placing boundaries.
I tried to leave a year ago and that went horribly. They found me and persuaded me to come back alongside my mother. Saying a lot about how horrible I would be if I left and I was ruining my life and my daughter’s. After this I end up FUCKINg pregnant! I want an abortion, he doesn’t agree everyone guilts me and denies me access to an abortion until it’s too late. I decided to stick it out cuz I’m pregnant. We move out of the country while Im pregnant. I accept it am excited for the birth. Then boom When I give birth a few months later the baby is stillborn. Everyone is an asshole and was an asshole my whole pregnancy.
I’m the main person working during my pregnancy hell I was working the night I went into labor, and I’m still working immediately after.
It’s been a month since and I am just trying to organize leaving so I can heal and grieve in peace with my daughter and just be free of this whole thing.
Now I’m just trying to save up enough for tickets for me and my daughter to fly back to the US and figure out our lives. so yeah any advice on how to get outta this shitty ass situation? And what to do once I’m back in the US?
Comments
Pick a city with a low cost of living that has a domestic violence shelter. Call the shelter in advance and see if they can help you or have a place when you get there.
Please have all you and your child’s paperwork in order.
I don’t know what country you are in but if it’s illegal for an adult to have sex with a minor, contact the police.
I don’t know what the US Embassy could do for you but depending on where you are, maybe they could help you with passport or visas if you are a US citizen.
Who’s your mother? I have a few things I’d like to discuss with her! I’m so incredibly sorry you’re in this situation. Wow. I’m speechless!
I would try and connect with a domestic violence nonprofit in the US and see if they can help you get back home. You might also want to contact the US embassy in your current country and explain the situation. Does your daughter have a passport? You might need her father’s signature to leave the country depending on where you are.
Never ever do poly. Never.
Im so sorry for what is happening to you, I hope you get to the States safely. I just want a clarification.
Did you have the baby at the hospital? And did you see the baby? I’m so very sorry for asking these harsh questions. I want to make sure that you were not not lie to, about the stillborn, without them showing you the baby. I am worried that they would have lied and taken your child as theirs.
Back to the US?
Where did they take you to? I’m fairly sure this isn’t far from human trafficking.
Additionally, I’m poly – these people are not. These people are just predators – nothing else.
I would be more concerned about your child. Has your mother ever intervened there?
This isn’t a relationship. It’s a predatory grooming crime situation. You’re a victim of a crime.
try to reach out to the US embassy. tell them you were sold by ur mother at 15. this is a crime, honey I’m so sorry for what u went through. Ask them for shelter and a way back to the US. They will arrange the tickets and other documents, passports are important but you already have them which is great to confirm that you are an American citizen. best of luck to you and your daughter sweetie.
leave without notice and without warning. Allow no contact. These people have abused and gaslit you into believing a very terrible situation is normal.
I hope all goes well for your exit, and for the relief you will feel when you are free of this situation and can start healing. I would recommend going no contact with your mom as well, unless you are already. Don’t tell any of these people where you are.