Living with MIL I can’t take it anymore

r/

Hello Reddit,
I am currently living with MIL because my husband and I lost our jobs. We’re likely going to start jobs by the beginning of September and are trying to move out by early November. We have been living with my in laws since the beginning of the year, very recently like within the last 2 weeks my MIL has changed her behavior towards me. We used to get along but now she is not smiling at me, not acknowledging me when I look at her and talk to her but also constantly staring at my body? It’s very strange. I’ve been on a diet for a couple weeks and this seems to have lined up to when she started treating me differently. I told her I was on a diet in casual conversation and she asked me what I was eating and I told her (more protein, whole foods and no processed stuff) She’s constantly staring at my stomach my chest and basically anything below my face. In the past even before this she has made several comments about my body specifically about my breast size which is on the bigger side. I’ve tried to talk to her about my progress and how I’ve been exercising and losing some lbs and normally I feel like she would be happy for me but as I said she hasn’t smiled at me in days. It’s really making me question myself as to what I did. She has made several comments on what I’m eating one day I had a hamburger with no bun and put some mayo on it a small amount and she said “wooooow look at all that mayo!” Another day I brought home donuts because she asked me to and when I got home she stared at my stomach and asked me if I ate 3. But then she’ll switch it up on me and last night for dinner we had chicken and veggie and buttered noodles and I didn’t have any noodles and she said “you’re missing out on the best part” she also was the only one with tomatoes on her plate and still singled me out and said “what you can’t have tomatoes on your diet either?” As im typing this out it sounds like I could be overreacting but her demeanor has completely shifted towards me. She’s normally very nice and shows interest in me and my life and that has completely gone away in a matter of the last 2 weeks. I’m so confused. Context of my MIL: unfortunately she is a diagnosed narci***** so there is really no resolution here. She does not handle confrontation well at all and will give the silent treatment for days if you upset her. She also has openly admitted that she over exercises and under eats purposely. She is already very small and is active for her age (65) but does not look “fit” just thin. I really would love an opinion on why she is treating me this way. Im feeling very uncomfortable in the house now and I think it’s showing. Im not talking to them as much and im staying on our side of the house more. I’ve been practing emotional detachment the past few days but if anyone has any advice I would appreciate it. Thank you.

Comments

  1. spoopygorl Avatar

    I also forgot to add (not that it matter really) but I am an average size and not overweight at all I really just want to tone up as I haven’t been consistent with exercise or diet lately so her staring at me constantly is just making me question myself and my body so much it’s a terrible feeling.

  2. botinlaw Avatar

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  3. KatzAKat Avatar

    Just like you, she likely “can’t take it anymore”. The “it” being you living in her home.

    Hopefully, you and your husband are contributing something towards at least the food and utilities you’re both using. Hopefully, you’re at least doing gig work. Hopefully, you’re cleaning up after yourselves and doing your own laundry.

    If you’re not paying for food, then your diet changes are likely causing your MIL to spend even more money on you.

    Get out sooner rather than later even if that means to somewhere less than ideal for you. Ideal is out of your budget at this point.