M20 Gained a LOT of relationship weight (no plan on losing)

r/

Hi, I’ve been living with my girlfriend (F21) for about two years now. I understand that it is normal to gain about 10-15 kgs (22-33 lbs) of relationship weight however the amount I have gained is truly astronomical.

When I moved in with my girlfriend I was 18 and she was about to turn 19. She is very fond of baking and bakes almost every week. Furthermore, we stay at home almost all the time, either cuddling in bed, or watching TV together, and sometimes just baking and cooking. At the time, I weighed 70 kgs (154 lbs) at a height of 5’9 and was relatively fit, however, having had a history of poor eating habits mostly related to binging and stress eating, I have managed to put on so much weight.

I’ll give you some contrast to show you the change in my diet and lifestyle in these two years.

At the very start, I ate a pretty normal amount, three meals a day, a snack when I came home from uni, and indulged in dessert often after dinner. This indulgence in dessert was already a sign as I never used to have dessert however I didn’t think much of it and my girlfriend’s baking is just irresistible. We also sometimes feed each other the brownies just as we do other food so many times there’s a “just one more bite”. This combined with a sedentary lifestyle obviously led to some weight gain but my increasingly large lunches and snacks were probably the main problem.

In college, there is normally an all you can eat buffet in the cafeteria, as is the case in mine, and my college has particularly good food. At first I tried to stay a bit healthy by having salads and maybe a sandwich once in a while, however one day I was recommended the spaghetti and the mac n cheese, and since then, I’ve been hooked. Even the desserts which I tried my best to resist since day one are now a necessary part of my meal.

When we moved in I also normally made dinner at home, even breakfast, however as life got busier, I just simply did not feel like I had time. This however was a problem I didn’t encounter until late into my second semester of freshman year.

In the first semester I gained 5 kgs (11 lbs) nothing too noticeable, a slightly larger belly and chubbier face but really not much at all.

In second semester however, I gained a tremendous amount of weight. Due to stress and binge eating habits I found myself constantly snacking when I had the time even increasing my portion sizes for lunch and dinner. Having only been able to eat the spaghetti or mac n cheese and dessert once a week to it becoming my regular meal and sometimes having even multiple pastries and servings of mac n cheese or spaghetti. My girlfriend also started giving me a box of cookies (10 each) for the day and when I’d go home I’d have at least one large bag of lays and get through another box of cookies binging while studying until it was time for dinner. During peak exam season all we did was order mcdonald’s and I almost always got a big burger with large fries and sometimes even a ten piece nugget, after which I’d have two brownies for dessert, one of which my girlfriend would feed me herself.

At this point my weight gain was very noticeable with many clothes being very tight or even not fitting at all with an exposed hanging belly. By the end of my first year I had gained a whopping 25 kgs (55 lbs) bringing my weight up to 95 kgs (209 lbs) and obese. My girlfriend didn’t mind and nor did I. She still loves feeding me and cuddling me.

In the next semester I gained yet another 20 kgs (44 lbs) which was largely due to me now getting through two large bags of chips and two boxes of cookies as well as 2-3 portions of spaghetti or mac n cheese and up to 6 pastries and two large cokes throughout the day. For dinner I had started cooking again but my portion sizes had not only increased but my helpings had too, with me being able to finish about three sometimes four bowls of pasta and have three brownies with three scoops of ice cream afterwards. Here I was 115 kgs (253 lbs) and a BMI of 37. This meant that in just one and a half years I had gained 45 kgs (99 lbs). I never reversed this because I found it impossible to do so, and besides I also found no need.

Second semester was always worse with more mcdonald’s and more food. Now throughout one day I get through 3 boxes of cookies, 5 bags of chips and for lunch I often have 2 servings of spaghetti and mac n cheese each, two plates of fries about thirty nuggets, three large cokes, 10 pastries, and 4 scoops of ice cream. When I get home I have about 5 brownies and half a tub of ice cream as well as three more bags of chips. By the time of dinner I finish about three boxes of cookies and even a bottle of coke. For my mcdonald’s order I get two burgers, three large fries, two twenty piece nuggets, two large cokes and four mcflurrys. For dessert I of course have 8 brownies, a tub of ice cream and even another box of cookies.

Now in the second semester of my second year I have gained 45 kgs (99 lbs) bringing my total weight gain this year to 65 kgs (143 lbs) and total weight gain being 90 kgs (198 lbs) and my final weight compared to my initial weight being 160 kgs (352 lbs)

TL;DR: Gained 90 kgs (198 lbs) within 2 years of living with my girlfriend as a result of sedentary lifestyle and binge eating. No plan on losing it, what’re your thoughts?

Comments

  1. Girl_Intern8105 Avatar

    You have gained significant weight that can put your health at risk, even if you feel comfortable now. If one day you decide to change, it won’t be too late and you can do it little by little, without guilt.

  2. WeirdAl777 Avatar

    It’s normal to gain 10-15 kgs of relationship weight…?

  3. TheAnxiousPangolin Avatar

    You’re putting your health at risk. I literally cannot work out why you’d even be okay with gaining that much weight. I don’t know if this post is just rage bait, or if your self esteem really isn’t what you think it is, but you need to put down the fork before you drop dead.