How many other women have experienced something like this? My M/35 husband of 2yrs was arrested for domestic violence after throwing me F/34 to the ground to get his phone back. The weeks and months leading up to this event, he was trying adamantly to get me to have sex with another man while he watches. He gave out my number without my consent, and had a stranger texting me sending me pornographic videos and pictures of himself. I clammed up and pretended like it wasn’t happening. When I went to sleep at night, my husband would sneak onto my phone and text back and forth with this man pretending to be me, also sending him nude pictures of me. After the domestic violence incident, I texted this stranger asking him how he got my number and why is he messaging me. He tells me my husband posted an ad on Reddit to solicit strangers to have sex or do “hot wife challenges” with me. He told me my husband tried to have him come over and surprise me with his “large package”. I was unhappy in our marriage prior to the incident because he is pretty verbally and emotionally abusive. That caused me to refuse sex with him. He wouldn’t take no for an answer and seemed to increase his sexual demands. One night he raped me anally in our bathroom after I refused to have sex with him, got out of the bed and tried to flee to the bathroom. Around this same time he purchased a 10inch dildo and began introducing it into the bedroom and foi used all those texts of when I was considering it to prove consent. But I clearly have texts telling him I didn’t want it, for a long time. Anyways, the case got presented to the grand jury and they no billed it. I guess if your wife ever agrees to something they’re bound to that agreement for life, and rape is ok. Think twice before you try to please your husband because he may use that to legally rape you for the rest of your life. Everyone says the justice system is unfair because the woman needs no evidence but that’s not true. I provided quite a bit of evidence but without a video it was too “muddy” for the grand jury to proceed.
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wait was he found innocent? i don’t get it
Where do you live? You can still divorce him
Except for it doesn’t have to be the rest of your life. Get out gf.
Did you have a question or request for advice?
Surprisingly no comments so far have said this, but I am so so sorry that this is happening to you. Physical and sexual abuse is almost always tied with emotional abuse and that can impact you in far more ways than you realise at the time. The emotional scars can take longer to heal than the physical. Your decision to take this to the police shows so much strength and as a stranger in really proud of you.
Leaving isn’t as simple as a quick decision and clearly your husband is a risk to your safety. Are there any local organisations that can support you? Have you got your own network of friends/family who could also potentially help?
Continue to be brave. You don’t deserve this.
Divorce? This post reads like venting but since it’s on r/rekationship_advice I’ll leave you with that. Leave him, and probably flee the house when he’s out, take whatever you can, and wait until you are a safe distance away before you tell him your intentions. By the way the court siding with him in a situation like this seems unusual, I wonder which country/state you reside in if you don’t mind sharing.
I have to wonder if that’s a red state thing… I think in CA rape is rape regardless of who. But we’re a blue state… Or we were for a while…
Having a grand jury “no bill” it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. We are living in bizarro world at the moment and that likely has a factor in the grand jury decision.
Just know that there are people out there who believe you. No woman wants this to happen and we know the strength it takes to confront your abuser and to leave them. If you haven’t done so yet, contact RAINN and see if there are resources for you for therapy and support groups.
Omg sweetie I am so sorry! Idk even know what to say but I have been through something similar with an ex-bf and I was worried if I went to the police they wouldnt buy my story because we lived together and I guess I was right. I am so so sorry. I hope that you are safe now and you can always DM me if you ever need to vent to a person who has been through similar trauma.
Sorry this happened to you.
How do you get raped anally?
All you have to do is tighten that butt hole up and he can’t get in.
Eww what a gross bastard
I went through marital rape for over a decade. I documented it throught the course of the years and have a. Paper trail. Currently going through divorce and was granted a life time protective order.
I’m so very sorry that you are going through this