Me (23F) and him (21M), together for 4 months.

Did he really like me, or was I just someone convenient?

So when I was 23, I fell in love with a guy who was 21. We had known each other for a long time—half of his life, actually. We were friends for years, and I watched him grow up.

As he got older, he began exploring relationships. One of those “experiments” was actually with one of my close friends. She would tell me stories about them going on dates and sleeping together. It was casual, but still, I was aware of it.

A year later, this guy started flirting with me and confessed that he liked me. I rejected him at first, mainly because I knew about his past with my friend—though he didn’t know I knew. He kept being persistent (“makulit”), and eventually, I gave in.

At that time, I was going through a rough patch mentally, and he was there for me. He comforted me, stayed by my side, and slowly, I started to fall for him. Before anything happened, I spoke to my friend about it. She gave her blessing and was happy for us.

So we started seeing each other seriously, not just as friends.

At first, things were good. He was sweet, supportive, and made me feel seen. But as the weeks and months went by, I began questioning everything. Was this really what I wanted? Something felt off. I felt like I was giving more—emotionally and financially. I paid for most of our dates and even helped out with his motorbike expenses.

He also started becoming distant. Sometimes he wouldn’t update me for hours or even days. He always blamed his internet or said he was overwhelmed with school. I tried to be understanding, but it became a pattern.

Eventually, I confronted him about it. He repeated the same reasons. I tried to hold on, but I was mentally struggling too, and I just didn’t have the capacity to keep giving to someone who wasn’t meeting me halfway.

So I ended it after 4 months.

Fast forward to now: I see him in a new relationship, doing all the things he never did with me. He looks genuinely happy.

Now I can’t help but wonder:
Did he really like me? Or was I just someone convenient during a lonely time in his life?

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TL;DR:
I (23F) dated a guy (21M) for 4 months after being friends for years. He had a past fling with my friend, but later pursued me. While he supported me during a tough time, I felt like I gave more emotionally and financially. He became distant, and I ended things. Now he’s in a happy new relationship, and I wonder if he ever really liked me—or if I was just a temporary comfort.