Men, is it really “any warm wet hole” will do?

r/

Overweight female, very self conscious, has an offer from a very good looking, in shape man, to help HER break a dry spell. We have talked, texted, messaged and flirted almost every day, but I can’t help thinking “just a warm wet hole; nothing special”. Tell the truth, does it matter what she looks like or no?
Edit#1
dry spell is an understatement and it was not self imposed; ex-husband did NOT want sex
Edit#2
To me, he is fit and good looking.
Edit#3
Not looking for a relationship or validation; I’m just freaking out because it has been so long since anyone has seen me naked, a long time since I have done anything sexual that didn’t involve a vibe and I would like to make him feel good too. So I am freaking out

Comments

  1. Cyberhwk Avatar

    Doesn’t sound to me like you’re comfortable with casual sex.

  2. JawzX01 Avatar

    Not to me but it’s hard to answer this question without more information about the guy in question. He’s in-shape and has a dry spell. What does that mean?

    I mean, perhaps he’s interested in you and has a self-made dry spell.

    What type of guy is he? Does he end up spending a lot of time with you at these parties?

  3. effascus Avatar

    you are so much more than your weight / what men think of you!

  4. Aracnida Avatar

    This idea that all men are comfortable fucking a warm wet hole is insulting and ridiculous. Men are not a monolith. While there are certainly men out there who would fuck a mossy rock formation if they had the chance, most men would not even think about it. While there are certainly many women who hardly think about sex unless they are in a committed relationship with respect and shared dreams, there are many many more women out there willing to fuck anything that gives them validation.

    For your specific situation, take a step back and ask what YOU want. Do you want to have sex with this person? If so, why? Is this just to get a dick in you? Is it to prove that even though you are overweight you can still pull a hottie? What are you in this for? Don’t worry about them… unless that is a key piece of what YOU want.

  5. SyrupStandard Avatar

    >”Men, is it really “any warm wet hole” will do?”

    No… what the fuck?

  6. Lindischka Avatar

    Sadly husband has confirmed this is the case sometimes

  7. thenletskeepdancing Avatar

    Please don’t downgrade yourself this way. You deserve to be loved and respected.

  8. Smithereens_3 Avatar

    It really, truly, fully depends on the person.

    Maybe this guy is someone who believes any hole will do and sees you as an easy way to break his dry spell. Maybe he’s someone who needs to be comfortable with a person before sleeping with them and wants you because he’s comfortable with you. Maybe he’s totally into you and wants to downplay that. And maybe he’s just into casual sex.

    It’s a question with way too many variables that will be answered differently by every individual, and it’s a conversation you should have with him if it matters that much to you.

  9. AdElegant3851 Avatar

    So …. there’s a lot to unpack here. No matter how we percieve ourselves, that rarely aligns with how others see us. Sometimes, you just need to trust that the person in question knows what they like and they are finding it within you. Have fun. See were it goes.

  10. LongLiveTheSpoon Avatar

    A lot of men, yes. Me, no.

  11. DragonflyWhich7140 Avatar

    Okay, listen. I want to be very honest with you here, and I hope this comment can serve as a voice of reason. No, it does not matter exactly how you look. I am saying that clearly and without hesitation.

    What truly matters is a genuine connection. I am not necessarily talking about love or full-blown romance, but something deeper, a sincere attachment. I mean the kind of connection where you are genuinely interested in another person, where you just want to talk to them and listen to them. And yes, sex can be an incredibly joyful and exciting continuation of that connection, but it is not the foundation.

    I am an extremely average guy. I am 5’9″, not jacked, and I have always been self-conscious, even insecure, about the fact that I gain weight faster than a newborn seal unless I monitor every gram of food I eat. And still, women have told me that I am “interesting.” Maybe I try to connect more naturally, I have no idea.

    It works the other way around, too. If someone feels mutual passion, intellectual chemistry, ora real emotional connection with you, looks become secondary. What does matter is taking care of yourself. Shower. Dress decently. Stay reasonably healthy. Do not spiral into extremes. That is it. And no, “any wet hole” is not enough. I have had casual hookups, I ended politely because I just was not feeling it. Without connection, it is just another form of empty masturbation. Nothing is exciting about it.

    I am sure things will turn out okay. I just wanted to offer a bit of balanced perspective

  12. yung_tyberius Avatar

    Well, say something. Gague the conversation next time and try to see if he’d like spending more time together or something. Baby steps and don’t sell yourself short.

  13. butt_soap Avatar

    Yea, no. Maybe to the rare creep

  14. 1w2e3e Avatar

    For some yes, for some no. Some guys like big girls. There is no one size fits all.

  15. A96 Avatar

    It varies form person to person. For me there has to be legit emotional attraction.

  16. pickledplumber Avatar

    I couldn’t get aroused to 98 of 100 women but there are some guys who could get aroused to 100 of 100 women. It all depends on the guy.

  17. JustMMlurkingMM Avatar

    Looks can be important, but not every man is interested in stick thin women. Many men like a fuller figure. Some men are obsessed by large breasts and big butts.

    Your insecurities may be playing tricks on you here. It sounds like he considers you sexy. You’ve talked and flirted and he’s interested. Are you interested in return? If so, forget about what the media tells you is beautiful, revel in your femininity and enjoy yourself.

  18. KarmaticFox Avatar

    Every person, man or woman, is attracted to different things.

    Some people like roses, and some people like tulips.

    That’s just how it is. You may be someone this guy finds very attractive so try not to worry about it so much. If you get the vibe that this guy is a creep then move onto the next one.

  19. -Rhymenocerous- Avatar

    Fuck these comments. If you want some action, go book that dick appointment, you never know. It could lead somewhere / end up as FWB’s/ lead nowhere.

    You’ll never know unless you do something about it.

  20. space-ferret Avatar

    Some dudes will fuck anyone. Some dudes prefer BBWs, some dudes don’t care about looks or even feel of their vagina, they need an emotional connection to love. It’s a spectrum and you shouldn’t base your worth on how others see you. If you are a good person and good to others, you don’t need fuck bois, you need a man. Raise your standards and stop looking, that’s when you find your person.

  21. Brightredroof Avatar

    I’m unclear why it matters tbh.

    If you just want to shag the guy cos he’s hot and you need to break a dry spell, why are you judging his motivations? Yours aren’t any more “pure”.

    If you’re looking for a relationship instead of casual sex, then you need to address that upfront. Because if that’s not what he’s after, your weight or other aspects of your appearance are irrelevant.

  22. Ambercapuchin Avatar

    Nope. If you’re chatting with a dude at a party about how it’s been too long and he offers, it’s likely he’s being friendly and offering some dick to make you feel better. It’s you being weird with the “men will f anything” perspective.

  23. mark503 Avatar

    I think you need to have some self respect. Learn to love yourself so others can be able to love you as well. Humans come in all shapes and sizes. Beauty is judged on a case by case basis. It is also judged differently every time.

    It’s why the 2 rules of attraction are

    1.Be attractive

    2.Don’t be unattractive. This isn’t looks. It’s what you say and who you are. Guess what 1 means. The same thing.

    Even if you find someone who wants to be with you. It will be difficult because it seems like you don’t love yourself like you should. Notice I said “like you should” not that you don’t at all.

    It’s ok to look different. Be the change you want to be if you aren’t happy with yourself. You can be unhappy with your weight. You can also try to work on it some. Only you can make yourself happy.

    I wish you luck on whatever you do.

  24. Cosmonate Avatar

    Men aren’t a monolith, just like women aren’t. For some men, yes. For some, no.

  25. Technical_Goose_8160 Avatar

    First of all, there’s a lid to every pot. He wouldn’t be propositioning you if he weren’t interested.

    The any warm hole will do isn’t how most men feel most of the time. When you’re really desperate, drunk, or thirteen that might be true. But most of the time, even guys want a little more.

    What’s most attractive though isn’t waist size or bra size or anything like that. It’s a connection. That’s what’s really attractive.

    If a guy propositions you, he might just want to have sex with you. But he might also be attracted to you. Don’t be afraid to tell him that you want to date if that’s what you want. But don’t be too down on yourself, there are other people who’ll do that for you.

  26. The_Lat_Czar Avatar

    100% depending on the guy. 

    Very good looking men have options and know it. Maybe you’re his type, maybe he likes your attitude and wants to sleep with you because of it, or maybe he really is just a crazy horndog who wants to fuck as much as possible with whomever until he dies. We don’t know him. 

    It sounds like you’re entertaining the idea of breaking a dry spell and not trying to get into a relationship, so does it really matter at this point? 

  27. No_Dependent_1846 Avatar

    Even if it’s a one time thing, please sleep with someone who wants your body… not just any body! You deserve to be desired, even if it’s casual. Never ever sell yourself short!

  28. bbcczech Avatar

    Never give sex in the hope you get love.

    The unknown is never better than the truth.

    If he doesn’t want more than just breaking a dry spell, don’t do it from a point of weakness.

  29. Kitchen-Wasabi-2059 Avatar

    What’s the issue if it is for him? Sounds like that’s what was agreed on? Do you plan on him falling in love with you afterwards or were you looking for him to exclusively break a “dry spell”? Sounds mutually beneficial and best not to overthink it, men aren’t a hivemind. Any warm wet hole could do for him.

  30. LoneWitie Avatar

    Personality usually matters a lot more

    But he may be seeking casual sex whereas you seem to want more meaningful connection

    I think you need to have a conversation about expectations and desires

  31. Semisemitic Avatar

    Whatever you may think about yourself, I’m going to go out on a limb and promise you that you are in fact much, much more than that.

  32. BlackGreyKitty Avatar

    Men are attracted to things about women that may surprise you. I get turned on by women with big noses for example. I love bigger full figured women. Don’t sell yourself short

  33. HairyHorseKnuckles Avatar

    As with most questions on this sub the answer is sometimes yes, sometimes no. People are individuals so preferences will change from one person to the next. Dont do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable but also realize that you may regret a decision in the heat of the moment

  34. Talloakster Avatar

    What really matters is being turned on, for me. I’ve been with “gorgeous” (regular standards) women that somehow didn’t crank my crank. I’ve been very turned on with people that didn’t fit the “hot” stereotypes. But the personality, conversation, dynamic etc are as important or more than that pure body type /looks.

  35. ThannBanis Avatar

    >parties have talked and flirted

    Over what sort of time?

    An ongoing flirtation would usually indicate more than ‘just a warm wet hole’…

  36. Unlucky-Pomegranate3 Avatar

    Honestly, if it’s strictly a booty call, it doesn’t matter too much as long as there’s good hygiene.

  37. britipinojeff Avatar

    If you’re flirting sounds like he wants you

  38. Trumpet_Lord89 Avatar

    Like on some level he has to be attracted to you otherwise he wouldn’t want to have sex. Sex with someone you aren’t attracted to is usually disgusting and traumatic. And there are far better options if you’re really desperate. If “any warm wet hole” would do, incels would not exist. So if he wants to sex with you, he finds you attractive. It’s not complicated

  39. Lurch2Life Avatar

    NO. It isn’t. I have standards. I’ve always had standards. Even when I was drinking heavily I had standards. Even when I was going through a LOOOONG dry spell had I standards.

    It’s just that frequently at past points in my life, the standards were low.

  40. ZenPoonTappa Avatar

    I’m siding with the ex husband. 

  41. DestructoDon69 Avatar

    For some men? Yes. For others? No.

    There are women that “a shaft is a shaft”. There are women that want the shaft to be attached to a person they find attractive. Same goes for men, turns out we’re all just people at the end of the day.

  42. bon_courage Avatar

    Absolutely not. Not if you have any self respect. 

  43. thomcge Avatar

    No? Wtf?

    Plus, either way who said it had to be wet? Or warm? Or a hole for that matter?

    This is so poorly formulated.

  44. keith2600 Avatar

    For some guys yeah, for others that is a gross simplification. Generally what that means is someone you don’t have any issues with (looks, personality, etc) but aren’t necessarily friends with and not really desiring a relationship. I’d say for nearly everyone I’ve ever known has fallen into the latter category with the exception of a couple guys who would probably fuck sheep if they could and a couple guys that were extremely picky.

  45. Vipper_of_Vip99 Avatar

    Maybe it’s the opposite, maybe he is worried you just want a warm, wet pole?

  46. 3tree3tree3tree3 Avatar

    Bit of a self sabotaging mentality. He might be into casual hookups and that might not be for you but it’s a bit cruel to both him and you for you to assume he couldn’t possibly be into you or that if he is, then he has absolutely no standards.

    I’m morbidly obese and married to someone who completes cycling marathons and iron man competions.
    Don’t hate yourself so much that you decide other people have bad taste for flirting with you.

  47. KokirisEmerald Avatar

    Although most guys will deny it, that’s pretty much the consensus. Especially if they have a few drinks. LOL 😂

  48. PrincessCyanidePhx Avatar

    Confidence is the sexiest thing to a man. Every person has a preference. Capitalism would have you believe that only size 0 is sexy. But that doesn’t tell you that BBW is the most lucrative p0rn.

    I met my husband when I was a size 24. I’m a 16 now. He loves me regardless. He prefers larger women. But he is really turned on when I am the girl in the Cake song. We’ve been together 20 years.

    Ask them straight forward; what are you looking for in a relationship?

    If they are willing to date you in public, that is different than the guys that only want to fuck because they have a fat fetish. Yes that’s a fetish. Your weight has no bearing on how sexy you are.

  49. Duckfoot2021 Avatar

    There are different kinds of attraction.

    (A) He might be genuinely turned on by a variety of shapes and sizes including yours.

    (B) He might be down for any sex he can get.

    (C) He might find you sweet and have sympathy attraction for your situation and be turned on by the idea of giving you the good time he thinks you deserve, even if it’s short term fun.

    (D) He might genuinely dig you.

    But your question right now should maybe not focus on his possible motives, and focus instead on would you like to fuck him.

    NOT “would I like a relationship” or “does he really like me” because those questions are pure fantasizing anyway that only time will sort out.

    What matters is if you want him. It’s a simple question. There are no guarantees of more and you shouldn’t expect any. Neither should he. Neither should anyone because the question of sex isn’t a bargain or negotiation….it’s really about what you both want now.

    Figure out how you feel about that and you’ll have your answer.

  50. Pittlers Avatar

    What makes you think he isn’t attracted to you? Overweight doesn’t mean unattractive. He might be into you, girl.

  51. Ok_Dog_4059 Avatar

    I have been accused of “anything with a pulse” kind of guy. I never really thought of it like that. I like all sorts of women. Just because a woman isn’t a 10 or even an 8 by my standards doesn’t mean she isn’t a beautiful and unique person or that I am not attracted to her sexually. Sure there are women who I just don’t find attractive but the ones I do vary so wildly that given the opportunity I would say a solid 85% or more women have a shot with me if they want to have sex. Beyond just sex there is so much more to a person than appearance that I could absolutely see myself passing on an 8 to date a 6 because looks just don’t make up for many many other traits that make a woman a great person.

    This is one perspective from one guy but I hope it helps.

  52. Mountain-Wing-6952 Avatar

    Depends on your personality. Most men are happier with a less attractive woman who has a great personality over a woman who has a garbage personality and is more attractive.

  53. Mcsmack Avatar

    Not for me. I need a real connection to be interested. I’m okay with friends with benefits, but I need to really know the person first.

  54. BabyMamaMagnet Avatar

    Not all men are the same despite what women say. 

  55. AMexisatTurtle Avatar

    Even if you do it make sure to have them wear a condom cause that’s how my baby cousin was made and the dude kinda left there lives

  56. m1rrari Avatar

    Don’t speak for all men but: as with most things in life it depends.

    Personally, physically appearance isn’t very important, as attraction comes from personality and intelligence. I’ll note: I used to say not matter, but there are things I find repulsive and will kill any chance at attraction.

    But, my father was definitely on the “Any hole” side of things. It was more important to get his dick wet than anything else to him in life, only thing that matters.

    Idk that that helps, but it’s really dependent on the guy.

  57. nipslippinjizzsippin Avatar

    to some guys, it doesnt matter at all. to others it will. sounds like it doesnt to this guy, just an easy no effort win, to notch the belt with.

  58. Kyleforshort Avatar

    Men aren’t a monolith. Different men like different things. Sometimes that thing is any warm wet hole, sometimes it isn’t.

  59. 64Olds Avatar

    I mean, some dudes will fuck a couch but we’re not all JD Vance.

  60. ovid31 Avatar

    You have agency here. If you’re attracted to this guy and you’d like to have sex with him, you can totally do that and just enjoy it. If you’re only interested in sex with people with whom you feel you’re on a more long term trajectory, then you’re gonna have to talk to him about this.

  61. onomatopoetix Avatar

    this is a one-night stand someone is offering you willingly. Sometimes overthinking is just unnecessary. Just go with the flow and best of luck.

  62. Duardo_e Avatar

    Sounds like he likes overweight women and doesn’t want to admit it

  63. implodemode Avatar

    Some guys really like women who aren’t skinny. He knows you. He’s gotta be into you or he wouldn’t offer.

  64. lipslut Avatar

    Not a man so no input to your question, but just want to say I get where you’re coming from.
    I’m fat and most of my adult life has been dry spells with some breaks (at varying body sizes). It’s rough. I’d totally be up for some casual sex, but I’m way too self-conscious these days to be intimate with someone.

    What some men here don’t seem to get is that sex isn’t so great when, in the midst of the fun, it becomes clear you are being fetishized or seen as sub-human. People can be cruel.

    FWIW, I say listen to your gut and enjoy yourself. People like people and you never know what someone’s preferences are or what they may see in you.

  65. GWARY54 Avatar

    I think two things can be right at the same time. Both are interested in each other and sex is sex.

  66. imfamousoz Avatar

    I’m not a man but I am a fat woman. I’ve been overweight for quite some time. I also draw plenty of romantic interest from men. My husband is astonishingly good looking and strooong, ten years of marriage has softened him a little, but not much. If we’re talking conventionally attractive he is way out of my league but he is so enthusiastic about me. You’d be surprised to learn how many men are legitimately attracted to bigger women. Gym bros in particular are a demographic with a surprisingly high number of those guys. You’re cool.

  67. tropicsGold Avatar

    Have women simply forgotten how this works?!? You lure them in with the pussy, then you make it so good he can’t get enough. Then you start cleaning their apartment, doing laundry, being a love filled joy to be around. Dude will never let that go, even if there is a little extra padding.

  68. goldandjade Avatar

    Maybe for some men but most of the grown men I know at least want to only sleep with people they like and respect even if it doesn’t end up being a long term thing.

  69. N0Z4A2 Avatar

    Not for me, definitely not. There are exceptions of course, some people just have a raw sexual energy or we happen to just click in the bedroom. But if I have my pic I’m always going with chubby gals gif

  70. Tungstenkrill Avatar

    I’m in shape and am attracted to a range of body types.

  71. tony22233 Avatar

    Im sure he knows what he is getting himself into. Some of us prefer bigger women.

  72. CoatedWinner Avatar

    It depends on the guy and the girl. For me, and I choose to have sex with people I actually like, a little extra weight “overweight” is cool and up to a point. But at a certain point it’s not attractive to me. Everyone has that same sort of gauge on the spectrum of body types they find attractive unless they’re unbelievably shallow and picky. I find my taste a more realistic view of the world but also not going after the biggest girl in the room necessarily.

    More important is the personality and the face to me as far as attraction goes. If I’m going to have sex with someone it’s pretty much 100% whether we vibe and I like who they are as a person and their body/attractiveness is way low on the priority list.

    And no… I’ve done the “warm holes” and “meaningless sex is good” phase of my life, it’s not good, I’d prefer my own hand. Even if the girl is out of this world attractive to me if she’s annoying or offputting I’d rather go home and imagine having sex with a hottie than actually do the deed and regret it immensely immediately after and for the foreseeable future. Been there, done that, rather have sex with someone who I like. Physical attraction does a lot for a lot of people but after a while it’s just not the thing.

  73. jennybean2442 Avatar

    You’re over thinking. Some guys are like that unfortunately. I’ve had my fair share of them. But some are genuinely interested. This guy very well could be into you. It sounds like he thinks you’re a beautiful woman that he wants to connect with physically. You’re smart. Use your best judgment.

  74. lootenantdank Avatar

    Here’s the thing is that, fat people are hot. Maybe he wants to bang you cuz he thinks you’re hot.

  75. Sad-Entertainer1462 Avatar

    Overweight females, in my experience, have better and wetter.

  76. Abject-Grape2832 Avatar

    Whenever there is a considerable disparity in looks, the hotter one is usually the more toxic one behind closed doors.

    Some people want love. Some people want control.

  77. EyesWithoutAbutt Avatar

    If your self confidence is low right now, he could be targeting that. He could hurt you sexually and physically. I’m not saying it is always true but there are some bad men out there. Or he could be into you. I’m just warning you for safety.

  78. alexmaycovid Avatar

    You can also use him as a pretty hard stick so it won’t matter 🙂

  79. ItzBwenin Avatar

    Holes is holes at the end of the day.

  80. vampireRN Avatar

    Depends on the guy. For me, no. Not any warm wet hole will do. I need some connection. If I get the vibe that I’ll probably get roasted in the group chat afterward, I’m gonna pass. And have because of that exact thing.

  81. 0dineye Avatar

    Dont call her my lady if she aint 280 😉

    Also, hes not offering to be your boyfriend. Hes offing to fk you if it will help ease your anxiety.

    Fluffly women arent unattractive, even tho yall feel that way.

    Men are really attracted to hair too. I think most humans are.

    Get out of your own head. That is the most important thing.

  82. DannyHikari Avatar

    If you want to generalize. The best answer is for more than enough men, yes this is the case. For all men no. For me personally no. That being said, being larger isn’t a deal breaker for me if someone is hygienic and is attractive to me in the face which is what I base attraction on before weight.

    Honestly, you’re thinking this, if it’s making you feel like this id highly suggest not going through with it.

  83. kinks96 Avatar

    Well i can tell you that looks certainly matter to extent, but that doesnt mean everyone wants the same looking one. But what matters to me the most is whats inside her head, meaning that she can be the hottest one out there but if her mentality and personality is shitty she instantly isnt attractive to me and if there is a girl who isnt seen as “hot” per se and has a great personality, open mindness with sex, she is instantly a turn on for me… so yeah, hope you understand what i mean?

  84. Naxilus Avatar

    Definitely not

  85. SonnyMonteiro Avatar

    Looks matter. It’s really difficult to get hard if you don’t feel a minimum of attraction. If he’s offering, he probably wants you as a whole, not just as a hole.

  86. Intelligent_Breath99 Avatar

    A lot of man are like this, in my country say “In times of war, any gap is a trench”

  87. AceFiveSuited Avatar

    If you’re clearly out of his league looks wise, then most likely he is just looking to have a fun casual night. Most guys that are fit and attractive know its a lot less work to get laid with overweight women.

  88. ExcitedGirl Avatar

    Don’t freak out; no need. Men who like larger women… REALLY LIKE larger women. One of my best friends is quite heavy and one of her breasts is much smaller than the other. She isn’t especially “pretty”, but she laughs at herself about her weight and gave up “dieting” – whatever that is – long ago. She’s just herself.

    She has many more, um, dates… than do any of our so-called “average girl” girlfriends. She really enjoys sex and isn’t in the least embarrassed about saying so. So if men express an interest in you – they are really interested in you and you have absolutely nothing to be afraid of. Go out, have fun, and live your Best Life!

    PS – she’s learned not to date guys more than 3 times; if she does, they ‘fall in love’ and all of the “who were you talking to’ and ‘what were you doing Saturday night’ stuff starts.

  89. SubstantialFinance29 Avatar

    I was a very in shape and muscular guy multiple times in my life depending on my job or amount I went to the gym. I have a pretty face. I LOVE me a BBW, especially when they own it.

  90. VaderSpeaks Avatar

    A non-comprehensive list of possible reasons:

    He’s into larger women.

    He likes you in particular.

    Any warm wet hole will do.

    He likes sleeping with people he won’t feel self conscious around due to his own body image issues.

    He’s a narcissist that enjoys sleeping with people he thinks he’s better than.

    He thinks he’s helping someone out.

    He’s trying something new.

    You remind him of someone else that he wants but can’t have.

    He’s a sex addict.

    He’s trying to break his own dry spell.

    Truly an endless list of possibilities. Best to simply enjoy it. 🤷‍♀️

  91. TexasScooter Avatar

    Responding mostly to your last point, he knows what he’s going for if he sleeps with you. Men can largely tell what you would look like naked – not 100% accurate, but enough to know what we’re going to see. And some guys are either into that or just don’t care. Other guys try to sleep with larger women because they believe the woman will be more willing to do things that other women would not. But if he wants to hit it, and you want to do the horizontal dance with him, and you know it’s not leading to anything permanent, then stop worrying about it and just do what you want.

  92. dcp00 Avatar

    This made me so sad to read. I have no words.

  93. IanHall1 Avatar

    I believe the saying is, any port in a storm. 👍

  94. green_meklar Avatar

    >Men, is it really “any warm wet hole” will do?

    No, but…yes, sort of. We do have standards. But our standards are lower than women’s standards and also different and sometimes unexpected from women’s perspectives.

    >Overweight female, very self conscious, has an offer from a very good looking, in shape man, to help HER break a dry spell.

    I mean, it’s up to you. Personally I’m not attracted to women who are substantially overweight (and I think you owe it to yourself to stay healthy, regardless of sexual prospects). But some men are indifferent or even like that.

    >does it matter what she looks like or no?

    Yes, but also who she is. There are reasons why even chronically lonely virgin men tend not to get prostitutes.

    Certainly the proportion of women I consider attractive enough is way larger than the proportion of women who consider me attractive enough. I mean the latter is close to zero.

  95. swiggityswirls Avatar

    You are projecting your own insecurities onto him! You’re the only one saying that to yourself because of your own self consciousness.

    You’re attracted to him, right? Okay, thats something you know about yourself.
    He’s the only one who gets to decide for himself what he’s into. It sounds like he’s attracted to you too.
    Every single one of us has stuff we’re into. It’s wildly unfair to judge and assume what any other person is into. Let each person choose for themselves.

    When those intrusive thoughts come in just name them for what they are – they’re your own anxieties about yourself that have nothing to do with him. Thoughts aren’t facts. Feelings aren’t facts. They’re just signals by you to you.

    Where you pay attention more is how you feel and why. If you feel fear, then question why. Where it’s coming from. If you feel guilt or shame, question their origins. But otherwise, just identify the feelings and thoughts that you can trace back to your insecurities and let them go.

    And there’s no rule that once you start sexy time that you have to go all the way. You can kiss and pet and that’s it the first time. You can kiss only. You can pet more later. You can get naked but no penetration. Basically, you may have a better time if you just do the next thing that feels right when you’re in the moment. Don’t let stressing about the whole thing fuck with your head.

  96. SaysPooh Avatar

    Yes it is if you are meeting up for sex. If you want a relationship then meet to do other things together until you feel confident it’s right or he leaves

  97. comfortboner Avatar

    Any port in the storm

  98. littlegoddess Avatar

    Have you met this person? Or is it just over the phone 📱?

  99. mr_jinxxx Avatar

    Some guys will fuck a hole in the ground. Some are more picky. And me I have to like you. There is no universal rule on this.

  100. capsaicinintheeyes Avatar

    Unless there’s something about you physically that’s >2 standard deviations from the norm in a bad direction (and there’s not–you’d know if there was), you are way over-worrying. He’s presumably already acquainted with your face & has a rough sense of your general body type—that’s enough to make an informed decision; most of the rest is tactile & unrelated to the visual.*

    tl;dr—quit losing sleep cramming for this test: you already got a passing grade.

    ^( *and above all, ignore any of that shit you hear online about guys’ alleged preferences for labia—not a single male has ever cared enough for it to impact the experience.)

  101. Dexydoodoo Avatar

    If it’s to break a drought and a one and done, does it matter? I mean you could see him as a big fleshy meat rod if it helps?

    Don’t worry about it. Have the sex with the hot man. Let him worry about what kind of hole it is. You worry about the fleshy meat rod. Together you shall combine and make orgasms!!!! Mwah ha ha haaaaaa

  102. Nvenom8 Avatar

    I mean, if he propositioned you, you’re attractive enough for him. That’s how it works.

  103. yitzaklr Avatar

    If you throw it at me, sure

  104. Delicious_Delilah Avatar

    Plenty of men are attracted to fat women. Yes, even very attractive men. I’ve banged literal models.

    Just go for it.

    But also work on your self-esteem.

  105. le0bit115 Avatar

    Everyone is different.

    For me, I can’t get it going when I don’t find their body in any bit attractive and I also need to know the person and have somewhat of a connection / feel comfortable around them.

    So no, not any warm wet hole will do, at least for me.

  106. 60svintage Avatar

    Nope. Not for me. I don’t do guys.

  107. _mr_kippers_ Avatar

    Reasonably fit and healthy male here. I’m physically attracted to larger women. In my opinion women are supposed to be voluptuous and have wobbly bits. It’s possible this guy is into you and your insecurities are telling you otherwise. He could also be an asshole.

  108. b0ingy Avatar

    There’s a lot of “good looking in shape men” who like large ladies. I had a roommate who was a very big girl and she and her handsome and very cut boyfriend were “loud”.

    Hook up with the guy or don’t, but don’t put yourself down. He’s not doing you a favor, he’s into you.

  109. AnomicAge Avatar

    For horny men with no standards I suppose it is

  110. Muahd_Dib Avatar

    For sex, it’s kinda tru. For relationship, no fucking way.

  111. yaboytim Avatar

    For me, there has to be some short of attraction. Like there are some women i find so unattractive that I’d never be desperate enough to do. Also, being overweight might not be a deal breaker for him. There are plenty of sexy overweight women. Being that he wants to go there, there must be some genuine attraction towards you besides “being a warm hole.”

  112. HeckleJekyllHyde Avatar

    Sometimes it doesn’t have to be warm. Or wet.

  113. mahogani9000 Avatar

    He has offered and communicated, sounds like he’s into it. Go with it!

  114. Rad_Knight Avatar

    Some men are into, how do I put this nicely, rounder women.

  115. sugurkewbz Avatar

    I am overweight and am recently single. I was briefly on a few dating sites and the number of fit/thin men that hit me up blew my mind! Everyone has their type, but it’s far more common for a man that’s in shape to be attracted to a curvy woman than you think!