Both problematic and healthy relationships with people – sometimes a relationship coming to an end of being disrupted for innocuous reasons allows you to reflect on them, and see them in a new light
How much I actually disliked working in an office and the issues it caused me – always thought I loved it, sociable guy etc. work from home worries me, love it, wouldn’t go back to an office
A distorted self destructive perception. I wanted to feel malice from people. I believed I wanted them to hate me. That way I know they were being honest with me. If I knew they hated me I would be in control and have a sense of power. They couldn’t hurt me without my permission. If they hated me it was expected they would, I would see it coming so it would be fine cause it’s part of the plan.
I did not know how to receive kindness cause I didn’t trust it, it’s a trick, a trap, strings attached and whatnot. Why would they show ME kindness? Nobody likes me at all so let’s keep it that way cause I’m subhuman. It’s the only way I knew how to live. Connected through malice.
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Hair on the top of my head.
Autonomy. We often take it for granted but get locked up in a psych ward or other place and you’ll quickly miss it
My dignity
Parents love ..
good knees
Optimism. I’ve always been called a pessimist, but I wasn’t always one.
Innocence. Crazy how quick you lose that one.
My ex wife
Be calm
Hope
Patience! I don’t know why but I can’t even fake it
Both problematic and healthy relationships with people – sometimes a relationship coming to an end of being disrupted for innocuous reasons allows you to reflect on them, and see them in a new light
How much I actually disliked working in an office and the issues it caused me – always thought I loved it, sociable guy etc. work from home worries me, love it, wouldn’t go back to an office
The weight of my family’s expectations.
A future I wanted
A decent life
Blessed solitude.
A world without a batshit crazy US administration.
My marbles.
Ignorance
Hope
Peace of mind.
r/misophonia is hell 24/7 (or like 16/7 if you’re lucky).
Will to live
A slight glimmer of hope
Mother.
Hope. And good knees
Fitness
Health
Beautiful woman, loved me to death, thought I hung the moon.
Walked away thinking I needed more life experience…. Dumb
Big dreams
A distorted self destructive perception. I wanted to feel malice from people. I believed I wanted them to hate me. That way I know they were being honest with me. If I knew they hated me I would be in control and have a sense of power. They couldn’t hurt me without my permission. If they hated me it was expected they would, I would see it coming so it would be fine cause it’s part of the plan.
I did not know how to receive kindness cause I didn’t trust it, it’s a trick, a trap, strings attached and whatnot. Why would they show ME kindness? Nobody likes me at all so let’s keep it that way cause I’m subhuman. It’s the only way I knew how to live. Connected through malice.
Turns out what I really wanted was to be loved.
Innocence.
An amazing woman and partner.
Traumaless existence or maybe I just wasn’t aware if the trauma I had
My health, at 64 I’m slowly inching back to fit. Different game from working out at 30 something.
The ability to sleep at 10
My youth. It left me earlier and more quickly than most as I developed ulcerative colitis at 30 and things haven’t been the same since.
True love