I stopped drinking and drugging…became the man my mom would have been proud of. Albeit a little late. Volunteer firefighter for 16 years, attempted to build a relationship with my oldest daughter.
Lost my mother at 15 in a horrible car accident. Every day I fear that I will lose my wife or kid in some horrible accident. Every time I go on a plane, or leave the house at all, I hug them like it’s the last time I’ll see them. There’s not a single time where I will fight with them more than a mild disagreement, for the fear that it may be the last thing I will ever say to them.
I am constantly knocking on wood, as I constantly think of scenarios where I will be left on this earth without them with me.
Nothing is ever worth anything more than the last time I’ve been with my family.
Tremendously. I lost my mother in a different sense but almost in the same way you mean in this question. I grieve her every day and I’ll probably never get closure. I can’t move on, I can’t grieve her properly and I don’t even know how. I’m just stuck every day in a constant state of grief with a pain that will never go away and never lessen. The only thing I can do is to try not to feel at all. I’m full of anger at the people who tore us apart and took everything of what could have been. It’s complicated but it’s not pero ay de mi
It’s an empty hole in your heart that no one or anything can fill. Three years and literally 2 days before Christmas is when I lost her. My life hasn’t been the same it’s the new new plus being unemployed for a year hasn’t been good on my brain.
We grieve differently. I did the hard stuff with arrangements and burial and was generally fine. When time came to see if the grave stone was correct and saw it, I burst into tears.
I lost my mother when I was 12. She had cancer all over her body and one day she just went catatonic while I was at school. Didn’t get to say goodbye. When I got home I held her hand, which was ice cold. Her eyes were open, she wasnt blinking. She was taking short breaths. I could only sit there for a couple seconds. It wasn’t my mother anymore. It didnt hit me emotionally for 3 years when I just started crying and I couldn’t stop for probably 6 hours.
My mother and I weren’t close and when I told her I wanted to kill myself she hit me and called me retarded so I didnt cry when she passed last October. A small part of me wanted to because it felt like I should but when she hit me and proved she wasn’t going to be there for me, but I think it just l lost my love for her.
I had been in a mid-functioning (as opposed to high-functioning) depression for several years. Consistently thought about being dead, or just not alive, but would only briefly consider suicide because I knew it would greatly hurt my parents. Then my Dad passed away in late 2019, and then Mom in mid-2021, both from relatively brief illnesses. 3 months after Mom passed the suicide thoughts came around again. And I realized I couldn’t hurt my parents any more, so that same day I tried. Fortunately I had two people wondering where I was and both showed up to my place within minutes of each other. I was in a coma for 2 days. But survived. I didn’t try because they passed away, though the struggle through their illnesses contributed. I tried because I no longer had that reason not to.
I lost my mother a few weeks before I entered rehab for self medicating through alcohol. She was suffering from Parkinson disease and was the last of her siblings to come down with what was an effect of the defoiliant that my grandfather was exposed to in the military. She started to experience hallucinations, which is the first indication of advanced symptoms, and rather than become incapacitated in a vegetative state She took her own life.
That hit me like a ton of bricks and it didn’t help to be going through alcohol withdrawal in rehab to have such a traumatic ending to her life without knowing that she going through the preliminary stages of advanced Parkinson disease. I was always taught by her to be pragmatic about death, but it was really hard to find the pragmatic side when we were so close when I was a child. I have to admit that it broke me for a while, but eventually, after I made it to the other side of rehab, I found the strength to mourn her tragic ending.
I just lost mine in January. It’s been rough. The first few weeks I couldn’t function at all. Barely slept or ate. I couldn’t stop seeing her lying there on the floor, whenever I tried to sleep. I kept blaming and hating myself. Even now, I dream about her a lot. Still crying when I think about her
I was devastated. My parents were the greatest. We were very blessed with the most loving and supportive Mom and Dad anyone could have, and their partnership was, and still is, the gold standard by which I measure my own marriage and parenthood.
We prepared for Mom’s passing for over a year as she battled leukemia, having been told at the outset that it was terminal, but no amount of early warning can truly prepare you for the actual loss.
The emptiness of losing my Mom only hurt until just after the funeral, when I watched my Dad walk back into his house, and I realized that, while I had lost my mother, he had lost the only woman he had ever loved, and now he had to learn to live a life without his partner.
That realization hurt me more than my own loss, and I mourned more for him than I did myself.
And through his loss and heartache, he still worried about us kids, making sure that we knew that we weren’t alone in our pain, even though I’m sure he felt alone in his.
Losing Dad years later was just as painful, but the emptiness was lessened by knowing that he was reunited with his love.
Sorry for the essay, but I will never tire of telling the world about my Mom and Dad.
My boyfriend lost his mom in high school and it’s been heartbreaking to watch him struggle with simple things like Mother’s Day commercials. He gets this distant look and just shuts down for hours.
I dropped out of college during senior exams. Mental stress was peaking. From there, i became a vagabond. I’ve lived in 15 states traveling job to job, I work roughly 3 months a year unless a big expense comes up. Otherwise, I just chill out in my hammock on the edge of town with a cozy fire and a pot of stew simmering on the fire some place out of the way. No drugs, no alcohol, no begging or panhandling, divorced, just peace and quiet minding my own business. I work for what i want and need. I read three hours a day on average about various topics, and I believe everything will be alright so long as you aim to be a decent person.
In other words, im disillusioned and dont care enough to bother. I just wanna be left alone most of the time, but other times, I enjoy company, so I’ll make food and share it with others to have an excuse to invite people over.
My family were nomads before and settled briefly, and I just took to the road again, not feeling like I fit right in any one place but the road.
Mom died when she was 38. Dad died at 27. I turn 35 tomorrow. Im in a weird headspace about it, but I’ll be fine.
Not great. I went down a depressing path for a few years. I had no direction. Did a lot of drugs and drinking. It took me some time to learn to move on.
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I stopped drinking and drugging…became the man my mom would have been proud of. Albeit a little late. Volunteer firefighter for 16 years, attempted to build a relationship with my oldest daughter.
Lost my mother at 15 in a horrible car accident. Every day I fear that I will lose my wife or kid in some horrible accident. Every time I go on a plane, or leave the house at all, I hug them like it’s the last time I’ll see them. There’s not a single time where I will fight with them more than a mild disagreement, for the fear that it may be the last thing I will ever say to them.
I am constantly knocking on wood, as I constantly think of scenarios where I will be left on this earth without them with me.
Nothing is ever worth anything more than the last time I’ve been with my family.
Tremendously. I lost my mother in a different sense but almost in the same way you mean in this question. I grieve her every day and I’ll probably never get closure. I can’t move on, I can’t grieve her properly and I don’t even know how. I’m just stuck every day in a constant state of grief with a pain that will never go away and never lessen. The only thing I can do is to try not to feel at all. I’m full of anger at the people who tore us apart and took everything of what could have been. It’s complicated but it’s not pero ay de mi
Loss my father, so a lil different. But I’d describe it as loss of Sanctuary.
It’s an empty hole in your heart that no one or anything can fill. Three years and literally 2 days before Christmas is when I lost her. My life hasn’t been the same it’s the new new plus being unemployed for a year hasn’t been good on my brain.
Just immense relief.
She won’t die until all light has left this world
Grief comes in waves even years later. It made me more introspective and more present with the people I still have.
Honestly I had a horrible relationship with my mom. She was an abusive drunk who hated me for just existing. I rejoiced the day she died
We grieve differently. I did the hard stuff with arrangements and burial and was generally fine. When time came to see if the grave stone was correct and saw it, I burst into tears.
I lost my mother when I was 12. She had cancer all over her body and one day she just went catatonic while I was at school. Didn’t get to say goodbye. When I got home I held her hand, which was ice cold. Her eyes were open, she wasnt blinking. She was taking short breaths. I could only sit there for a couple seconds. It wasn’t my mother anymore. It didnt hit me emotionally for 3 years when I just started crying and I couldn’t stop for probably 6 hours.
My mother and I weren’t close and when I told her I wanted to kill myself she hit me and called me retarded so I didnt cry when she passed last October. A small part of me wanted to because it felt like I should but when she hit me and proved she wasn’t going to be there for me, but I think it just l lost my love for her.
The world became a darker shade
My GOAT, my friend, the person who loved me the most.
I got anxiety after that. Also, some part of me died with her. There is an eternal loneliness that will never go away.
I had been in a mid-functioning (as opposed to high-functioning) depression for several years. Consistently thought about being dead, or just not alive, but would only briefly consider suicide because I knew it would greatly hurt my parents. Then my Dad passed away in late 2019, and then Mom in mid-2021, both from relatively brief illnesses. 3 months after Mom passed the suicide thoughts came around again. And I realized I couldn’t hurt my parents any more, so that same day I tried. Fortunately I had two people wondering where I was and both showed up to my place within minutes of each other. I was in a coma for 2 days. But survived. I didn’t try because they passed away, though the struggle through their illnesses contributed. I tried because I no longer had that reason not to.
Was one of the best days of my life.
Don’t get me wrong. I did love her.
But she had so many mental issues. She stole from me. Every other call when I left home was her begging for money.
I was always terrified that despite the fact that when I left home, SHE owed ME almost 100K, she would beg for help in retirement.
But she got lung cancer. From smoking. The fucking thing id been telling her since I was 10 to stop wasting our limited money on.
So when she died at around 66 (don’t know for sure) I was just relieved she wasnt my issue anymore
I was numb for a long time. I just should have been there more for her. But I was all over the country and didn’t get to.
I lost my mother a few weeks before I entered rehab for self medicating through alcohol. She was suffering from Parkinson disease and was the last of her siblings to come down with what was an effect of the defoiliant that my grandfather was exposed to in the military. She started to experience hallucinations, which is the first indication of advanced symptoms, and rather than become incapacitated in a vegetative state She took her own life.
That hit me like a ton of bricks and it didn’t help to be going through alcohol withdrawal in rehab to have such a traumatic ending to her life without knowing that she going through the preliminary stages of advanced Parkinson disease. I was always taught by her to be pragmatic about death, but it was really hard to find the pragmatic side when we were so close when I was a child. I have to admit that it broke me for a while, but eventually, after I made it to the other side of rehab, I found the strength to mourn her tragic ending.
I just lost mine in January. It’s been rough. The first few weeks I couldn’t function at all. Barely slept or ate. I couldn’t stop seeing her lying there on the floor, whenever I tried to sleep. I kept blaming and hating myself. Even now, I dream about her a lot. Still crying when I think about her
I am colder than I used to be
The only pain i felt was for my dad. She wasn’t a mother cshe was a wife.
I was devastated. My parents were the greatest. We were very blessed with the most loving and supportive Mom and Dad anyone could have, and their partnership was, and still is, the gold standard by which I measure my own marriage and parenthood.
We prepared for Mom’s passing for over a year as she battled leukemia, having been told at the outset that it was terminal, but no amount of early warning can truly prepare you for the actual loss.
The emptiness of losing my Mom only hurt until just after the funeral, when I watched my Dad walk back into his house, and I realized that, while I had lost my mother, he had lost the only woman he had ever loved, and now he had to learn to live a life without his partner.
That realization hurt me more than my own loss, and I mourned more for him than I did myself.
And through his loss and heartache, he still worried about us kids, making sure that we knew that we weren’t alone in our pain, even though I’m sure he felt alone in his.
Losing Dad years later was just as painful, but the emptiness was lessened by knowing that he was reunited with his love.
Sorry for the essay, but I will never tire of telling the world about my Mom and Dad.
My “mother” split when I was about a year and a half old, and I saw very little of her between then and when she died about 40 years ago.
So I suppose my response was something like “good bye and good riddance.” She meant nothing to me.
My boyfriend lost his mom in high school and it’s been heartbreaking to watch him struggle with simple things like Mother’s Day commercials. He gets this distant look and just shuts down for hours.
I dropped out of college during senior exams. Mental stress was peaking. From there, i became a vagabond. I’ve lived in 15 states traveling job to job, I work roughly 3 months a year unless a big expense comes up. Otherwise, I just chill out in my hammock on the edge of town with a cozy fire and a pot of stew simmering on the fire some place out of the way. No drugs, no alcohol, no begging or panhandling, divorced, just peace and quiet minding my own business. I work for what i want and need. I read three hours a day on average about various topics, and I believe everything will be alright so long as you aim to be a decent person.
In other words, im disillusioned and dont care enough to bother. I just wanna be left alone most of the time, but other times, I enjoy company, so I’ll make food and share it with others to have an excuse to invite people over.
My family were nomads before and settled briefly, and I just took to the road again, not feeling like I fit right in any one place but the road.
Mom died when she was 38. Dad died at 27. I turn 35 tomorrow. Im in a weird headspace about it, but I’ll be fine.
Not great. I went down a depressing path for a few years. I had no direction. Did a lot of drugs and drinking. It took me some time to learn to move on.