This happened a few years ago, but some of the posts here remind me of it and why I had every right to be upset.
My husband and I made it very clear we didn’t want our baby’s photos or information on Facebook. We discussed this many times prior to his birth and everyone said they would not do this.
So imagine my surprise when an hour after he was born we sent out some pictures to family and MIL immediately posted a picture of me holding the baby I had just risked my life delivering. It was a very private picture of me in my hospital gown and she had cropped most of my head out so that it showed just my chin and my baby. It said Welcome to the world! And then his full name.
I told my husband to get her to take it down and luckily she did but I was so mad. At the time I thought maybe I was overreacting, but now I see that she just didn’t care.
She was abusive to her own kids but now wants to be facebook grandmother of the year. So weird.
Anyway, glad I have people who understand.
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We had a fb grandma of the year too! It definately gets worse with the disappearing and then when you do see them, they ask for pictures of just them with the grandkids and their son only.
I don’t understand women who have gone through something as hard as childbirth to try and make it a worse experience for someone they call family. And then to play more games later on… its giving emotional immaturity and jealousy. And if you have a sil, forget it. She’s just the same too.
No more pictures for her. And demand her phone when she visits.
Totally understand! We also have a firm boundary about facebook- it started with no posting without permission but mil is so obsessed with fb and so lacking in judgement and impulse control that over the years it’s become neither us nor our kids exist so far as her social media is concerned. Don’t reference us, mention us and absolutely no pictures. At one point she went the better part of year without receiving a single picture (we live half way across the country) because she’d proven that she wouldn’t control herself and resist posting them. Make it clear to yours: that’s on the table for her.
I no longer have social media, but my husband has a FB he just doesn’t use. My MIL at least has some sense of shame. She BEGGED my husband to let her to throw us a baby shower. He wanted people to buy everything on our registry and I view showers as for the baby so I was indifferent. MIL has been awful since the day I met her and I put up with it until I was pregnant so she knew she was on thin ice with me.
She posted a photo of her and SIL before the shower captioned “We put the shower together under pressure!” I can’t imagine what she meant by that. In the comments she put a ton of pictures of me and DH from the shower… idk why she did it that way. She had not acknowledged my son being born at all lol I used my husband’s fb to check so maybe she blocked him from seeing if she had posted anything.
Your MIL totally disrespected your boundaries. Posting that pic without permission, especially with your vulnerable state post-delivery, was a huge overstep. You’re right, she didn’t care about your wishes. Now, you’re setting boundaries and sharing your experience. Good for you.
Sounds like she disregarded your boundaries and disrespected your wishes. You’re not overreacting, she’s just a narcissist trying to get attention through your kid. Good on you for standing up for yourself and your family.
Nah, you weren’t overreacting. That’s textbook “my control, my way” bullshit. Posting without permission, especially something so personal? It’s less about sharing and more about asserting ownership. She didn’t care then, and she still doesn’t. Classic narcissist move to play grandma on social media while disrespecting boundaries IRL. Good on you for calling it out.