My husband and i have made clear boundaries since before our baby was born that no one is to kiss her. We sent text out stating our boundaries when baby was born. Only people from my husband’s side of the family to acknowledge the boundaries were his sisters, the mil and fil ignored the boundaries but questioned his sisters on no kissing which sil explained. We also told my inlaws in person twice not to kiss the baby.
Now our baby is 2 months old. My mil and fil have not visited in almost a month and they live 20 minutes away. Im a sahm so they can visit anytime. They chose to visit this past weekend. For once everything seemed to be going great until my mil was handing off baby to fil. As she was handing over baby she brought her up to her face and kissed her head/face area. Two big smooches on her. I then said “we still are not letting people kiss her” which my mil replied “oh okay”. My fil held baby for a while till she was fussy/hungry. I nursed her and let her fall asleep on me not handing her back to my in-laws. My mil was annoyed i was letting the baby sleep and not waking her up and letting mil hold her. They left shortly after.
My husband and i were pissed and didnt want to confront them right there cause his mom will cry and the dad will get angry causing a fight. My husband and i had to decide how to handle this and the consequences of what she did cause she knew the rules. We have had major issues with the in-laws and boundaries also we are low contact with them.
A day later my husband texted his mom:
“We are pretty upset that you kissed baby. We have clearly given our boundaries and rules and reminded more than just the text of them, and they were still broken. We are not going to keep baby from you and you are able to see her, but we don’t plan on letting you hold her for a while.”
MIL responded:
“I was going to text you. That was a total mistake. I was snuggling her and did not even realize my mouth was close to her head until [yourbrokencondom] said something.”
“How long do I have to wait to hold her????”
Husband:
“We haven’t decided yet.”
MIL Responded:
“Please let me know soon. This breaks my heart for something I did not even consciously do.”
Clearly by her text the stories don’t line up. She admitted in the recent text she didn’t consciously do it. But no one just accidentally kisses a baby they haven’t been allowed to kiss from day one. Shes lying and digging herself a hole. My husband is over his moms lies and he is extending the time of her not being able to hold her. I knew it was a matter of time before this would happen, we will see how this plays out. This is my mil first time facing consequences of her actions of breaking boundaries.
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She absolutely did it on purpose to see what she could get away with. She didn’t even apologize or acknowledge that it made you guys upset, she’s only worried about herself being able to hold the baby. Not overreacting in the slightest.