So my husband are in between homes. We move into our new house in a month. My in laws offered to let us live in their second home. It’s not a house they live in, so we agreed. We are always on rocky terms with them but I always said, if it gets bad I leave. We are also going through IVF so I will remove myself from the situation if need be.
This house has a Ring camera. It catches every motion. When we first moved in, anywhere we went she was calling to see where we were going, why the patio furniture was moved, did you put the garbage out? After two weeks of arguing with her, my husband got her to turn off motion activation. Now, her new obsession is live views. We asked her to turn off sound so she couldn’t hear our conversations and she said ok.
She watches about 10-15 live views a day trying to see us. She claims she watches them to see the weather. It bothered me but I let it go. If she happens to catch us moving cars or something shell watch it until we go inside.
Yesterday, while outside having a conversation, she happened to do a live view at the same time. She then turned on the microphone to hear the conversation. She recorded about 1 minute of our conversation. I’m completely over it and said I’m moving in with my parents. I do not want my every move and convo recorded especially when I’m trying to lower my stress
She absolutely lost it that she has the right to the cameras of her house and I’m being dramatic and I should be grateful for her help. She will not stop calling and texting. I ignore her. My husband answers and tells her to stop bothering me. She doesn’t listen.
Am I being dramatic? Is there any better way to handle this?
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You’re handling this correctly, go stay with your parents.
Your MIL shouldn’t be invading your privacy, but she can view the cameras at her own home. That does not mean that you have to live there though. It’s not that you’re ungrateful, you just want to have and maintain a sense of privacy.
This is about trust and respect. Your MIL has shown you that you cannot trust her and she has no respect for you. She’s spying on you for her own entertainment and told you to suck it up if you’re accepting her help.
You might warn her that her current behavior has made her plummet on the list of desired babysitters. Her relationship with her future grandchild will depend on how willing she is to earn back your trust and show that’s she’s learned to respect you.
Put a sticker or tape over the camera lens?
Move in with your parents. This is just crazy behavior and shouldn’t be tolerated.
Oh my gosh – you could have so much fun with this if you want to be petty hahaha. Start talking in front of the camera about surprises (fake), doing things she wouldn’t approve of (getting your belly button pierced, your husband dyeing his hair green, go WILD), get creative with what you say! Park the cars weird, move the patio furniture to super weird spots, etc.
If she calls you on it play dumb and pretend you never said/did those things!
Yes, she’s entitled to have cameras in her own home. But also yes, YOU are entitled to live where you choose, complete with privacy. Your life is not her soap opera. And I’d also make it absolutely explicitly clear right now that your LO is not and will never be her baaabbbyyy or emotional support animal or whatever the eavesdropping boundary-ignoring tantrum-throwing cow has in mind. I suggest you get cameras for your new home, too, and record her every second she’s there. Hopefully that will make HER feel unwelcome and uncomfortable just like she has done to you, and will have the added benefit of capturing any nasty behavior so you and your husband can address it with her and show her video proof of her inevitable transgressions when she’s screams about not engaging in said behavior.
Unplug the cameras. That’s ridiculous.
“I can’t possibly have sex with you while we are staying here, it’s very creepy that your mother is spying on us. What if she has a camera in the bedroom.”