We were out to breakfast with my JNMIL and her weird boyfriend. My husband is holding our baby and MIL says “he is a total chick magnet!” like there’s something charming about the idea of random women throwing themselves at my husband because my baby son is in his arms.
She is constantly saying the most inappropriate things and it’s like I’m the only one who notices.
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Babies do tend to garner attention, and more often than not, from women. There’s something about a guy cuddling a wee one that is appealing to (many) women; I don’t have or want kids, so I’m ambivalent about seeing dads do their dadding. My bestie, however, finds it the most attractive thing in the world, because she wants the picket fence, a fluffy dog, and a few littles…and of course, a great husband/father as well. However, she does not throw herself at these men; it’s just a moment that she hopes to have in her life one day.
If it annoys you, speak up: “Do you think fathers only tend to their children for the attention of strange women?”
But to me, at least, this feels like a BEC moment. It’s a gauche comment, but it’s not as if she’s sexualizing your infant. Unless she’s somehow waving ladies over to make introductions, I’d let her know that you prefer she not refer to her son (or yours) as a “chick magnet.” Though if he is, be proud — nothing wrong with being married to a hottie.
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It’s never ok to sexualise kids or use them to sexualise another person. Trust your gut.
I understand both sides here. However, I lean more towards how you feel about it because honestly, the people saying this shit are usually the same ones as those who cry about how “you can’t even watch a movie without being forced to watch the gays, what about the children???” Meanwhile, speculation and indoctrination of their sexual preference? A-okay.
That said, I don’t think your MIL meant this to convey how he could attract random women. Maybe she did, obviously I don’t know her, but most of these people comment this more about the baby than about the one holding them.
I would personally also be grossed out by it, but yeah. Unfortunately, this is still normalized by a lot of people.
I understand your concern but think you may be overreacting. Feel free to talk to your MIL but I think it will just cause tension. She probably won’t see an issue or your side of it