Mom won’t acknowledge my boyfriend of 2 years (18M) as more than my “friend”

Me and my boyfriend (18F and 18M) started dating in my senior year (his junior year) of high school. We are both ahead a grade so I’m currently a sophomore in college and he’s a freshman. We have been long distance for a large chunk of it considering I go to an out of state college (8 hours away). We do visit each other not including breaks probably once a semester. We have been together for 1 year and 11 months- basically 2 years.

While I know we’re young, we have already talked a lot about a future together and plan to get married after we both graduate from college. The problem is that my mom always refers to him as my “friend”. If I’m visiting home and ask if he can come over for dinner she will instruct everyone to clean the house because “name has her friend coming over, we need to make sure the house is clean for any guests”. Like… maybe I’m overreacting but it’s kind of offensive to me that she won’t acknowledge that he’s more than a friend to me.

I’ve had conversations about how what we have is a serious relationship and we plan on being together for a while but she just doesn’t seem to get it. My mom is a perfectionist and wants me to live my life her way. My parents have expressed their disappointment in me still being in a relationship with someone from high school and how they wished I could’ve had the “college experience”. I’ve never been a partier, but I joined a sorority and am involved in several extracurricular organizations. I have several friends and am enjoying my studies a lot. I feel like I’m experiencing college in a way that is good for myself.

My mom grew up wealthy and both she and my dad are very successful while my boyfriend’s parents are not. He is from a poorer family and will be the first to graduate from college. I feel like a lot of my mom’s bias is because of that fact. However, I know him and I know he is working so hard to become successful so that we can both support our future family one day.

Something else that bothers me is that she will blatantly body shame him. I’m a size 12ish so I’m not a small girl, and my boyfriend is tall and skinny. My mom has made comments like “wouldn’t you like to have a guy who could pick you up?” or “I always wanted a guy who was bigger than me…” or giving backhanded compliments like “He’s a cute kid but he’s so skinny!” Some of these have been right in front of him too, his size is something he’s insecure about and it makes me so upset that she feels like it’s okay to say things like that in his company especially. I love my boyfriend just the way he is, and I don’t expect him to be able to carry me around or anything as an almost 200lb woman.

I’m also 9 months older than him and a grade ahead. My mother has made comments about how I should want to find someone who’s already successful rather than “dating down”, he isn’t immature but I feel like that’s how my parents perceive him because he and my younger brother (current HS junior)had some mutual friends in high school.

TL;DR: My boyfriend and I are high school sweethearts have been together for 2 years, we are now a freshman and sophomore in college and plan to have a future together. My mom has refused to acknowledge that we are in a serious relationship and refers to him as my “friend” and makes rude comments which upset both me and him.

I just want to hear other peoples opinions, do you think this is just because we have only been together for a couple years, because we’re young, or is that just how it will be since my relationship doesn’t follow exactly what they had envisioned? How do I approach the topic marriage and such if I’m still being treated like a little kid and my relationship is not being taken seriously?. I care a lot about my parents opinion of me and My boyfriend has very strong family values so my mom’s acceptance (or lack thereof) has become a problem in our relationship. While I know parental approval isn’t required, both of us want our relationship to be acknowledged and accepted by my family.