Most people truly want to be helpful, but often, their actions are more about feeling helpful and the satisfaction that brings than actually being helpful.
It’s understandable that doing something, giving advice, or jumping in FEELS productive and reassuring but sometimes just listening to the person and asking what they actually want/need is far better.
Edit: u/notmenotwhenitsyou pointed out some ambiguity and focused in on what I meant:
“…instead its about being clueless as to what constitutes as helpful.”
I’ll wrap up by adding that many people will forge ahead with what they think is helpful without first considering if they understand the whole situation and what they’re doing actually constitutes as helpful
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That’s why I never help anyone. I don’t want people thinking i’m just doing it for clout
how do you know someone isnt listening to what another needs in order to feel helpful and not be helpful?
It’s actually pretty easy if you have some skills and time. I volunteer with youth and a city garden. They just tell you what to do
Are you a psychic?
Very true, myself included. Its help from a selfish place for sure
Let me guess, you just got your first copy of an Ayn Rand book?
ok and? does their intention matter? they’re helping someone.
Yeah I do that for myself, but it doesn’t change the fact that the people in need of help got their issue resolved.