Hey!
We have been together for two and half years and it has always been clear, more or less that i dont like to post on social media.
She wants and asks me to post different TikTok trends, or just because. I dont really mind posting sometimes on ig story , when we have been like on a date, or birthday/womensday (for example).
She just asked me, why haven’t i posted her on this on specific TikTok sound, and just said “i just haven’t”. She should know, that i dont like posting anything. Not her, not myself and nothing’s else , really.
Now shes mad, and i get it that she wanna get posted and have the feeling that im showing her to everyone. It gets to this point often, more than i would wanna admit.
Does anyone else have similar situation, or could throw some advice in here?
Tl;dr Girlfriend wants me to post her, but i dont like to.
im going to sleep stressed as fuck . I hope go see some cold truths or helpful advices when i wake up.
(Sorry for my English. I know its understandable, but not smooth. Im working on it).
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If you don’t post anything ever, she’s being unreasonable.
I think I can understand her feelings. It’s easy to feel left out when everyone is doing a trend and she can’t because you never post. Here are some possible compromises to consider:
You should keep your own boundaries regarding privacy, but at the same time you can listen to her feelings about why she finds this important (feeling left out, feeling like you hide her, feeling like you’re not proud of her), and try to meet her needs in some way.
This isnt really about you posting exactly 🤔 I have a sneaking suspicion its more about her not feeling appreciated as your girlfriend so the easy option would be for you to show a grand gesture of love via social media.
My husband posts nothing about me, nada, fuck all, even when I gave birth to our very high risk baby (a child he wanted and persuaded for me to have) , not even a “mother is doing well”.
Do you show her appreciation in other ways or has the relationship settled into a taking it for granted stage? And be honest with yourself about it.
So yeah, essentially she’s asking for attention.
Oh man, I do not envy you. I’m a woman and I’m the same way, I almost never post anything on any platform. Just not my thing. It sounds like your girlfriend is being really unreasonable and frankly kind of foolish. If this is a huge problem for her then she should date someone who has a similar online presence to hers. It is not okay for her to demand you post more than you’re comfortable with. Your boundary is that you don’t post very much, she can respect that or leave. What we post online is forever and if you’re not comfortable with every moment being online, that’s totally fine and normal. Not only that, but this is a seriously immature thing to argue about in a relationship. Beyond frivolous. I think you can do better, find someone who is less of a headache.
the last thing on my Instagram is 8 years old.
This is called relationship advice, but I have no advice and a few thoughts. I suspect part of her feelings come from her wanting to feel like you want to brag about her to the world. And I suspect part of her feelings come from an urge to perform your love for the world to inspire envy in others. I say this because if she’s referencing other couples’ TikToks, then clearly they have stirred envy in her.
I’ve never posted romantic partners online, and I think that was the better choice for me, because every relationship except my current one has come to an end. So instead of leaving a trail of breadcrumbs in the form of deleted posts/captions every couple years, my posts show my more naturally stable relationships. While that’s not the same as “airing dirty laundry” and subtweeting them after a breakup, it still functions like an embarrassing announcement to people you know about your private feelings which are your business.
Your girlfriend is shallow. She should respect your boundaries instead of pushing her need for social media validation onto you.