I want to first start this by saying I absolutely adore my girlfriend and I find how she dresses to be really attractive. When we first met she definitely had a preference for clothes that covered her body, which stemmed from insecurities, but as she has become more confident in her body she loves to show it off. I think it’s great, it makes her feel empowered, confident, sexy. It makes me feel empowered too, I see she gets looks and I can just bet they’re all jealous that at the end of the day she’s coming home to me.
The problem Im having is wrapping my head around a couple new additions to her wardrobe. One is a completely sheer dress she wants to wear with just panties on underneath. It’s elegant and sexy, but totally see through and her whole body is out there except for a tiny strip of fabric covering her genitals. Another is one of those extreme micro triangle bikinis. To me, it seems like the desire to wear this is coming entirely from exhibitionist desires and it feels like something that is special, shown and shared with just me is being flaunted for others. It hurts to imagine her sharing these intimate parts of her body for others to see and loving the attention she’s getting.
And yet, I know she’s loyal to me and I really don’t think she would cheat. I don’t want to control her, I think it’s wrong and misguided. At the same time I can’t help but feel anxious and at times a little nauseous when I know she’s out wearing these clothes. So I’ve been sitting here with these feelings and unsure of how to proceed. Any similar posts have such extreme polarising reactions and I think my case is a little different because of the such extreme exhibitionist nature of the outfits i.e. other posts complaining about their girlfriend wearing crop tops or mini skirts etc. (which I love on her).
We’ve been together for about a year and she’s pretty terrible communicator so if Ive ever asked her about these outfits it doesn’t get very far. We’ve had a lot of ups and downs, almost broke up several times and this is weighing on me a lot.
I also had an ex who dressed very revealing too and she cheated on me, I’m sure this affects how I think too, even if I believe it really doesn’t.
I understand and fully accept that her putting these clothes on is to feel confident, and I know that that comes with being seen and noticed by others. Hell, I do the very same thing when I get dressed up for a night out. It doesn’t mean we want anyone else and at the end of the night the only thing on our minds is our partners. I just find it hard to understand why, in achieving this, she needs to show off every inch of her skin that is societally acceptable.
Am I just being insecure? If so how do I get past these feelings because I’m sick of them. I don’t want to feel this way and the last thing I want is to control her or make her feel bad for wearing what she wants.
TLDR: Sexy girlfriend likes to wear sexy revealing outfits, don’t want to control her, don’t want to feel uncomfortable about it either. Unsure how to proceed.