Me and my roommate have been living together close to 7 years now. For a long while we both said we were straight, but none of us brought anyone home. I was in denial for too long. Reddit helped me realise me and him are more.
Very recently he told me to accept our relationship for what it truly is. I did. So now we are together.
My parents are very homophobic and will disown me if they learn I’m with a man. My partner demands we go public and that I come out of the closet, he says he will tell them himself if he has to because in his words “I’ve lived in fear for too long”.
I’m terrified, I don’t feel ready to come out. Is the right choice to come out and risk getting disowned? Or is the right choice staying private? If I ask we stay private my partner says he’ll tell them himself.
Comments
You need to live your own life the way you want. As long as you aren’t hurting anyone, you deserve to be happy. That being said, you need to realize that not everyone is going to agree with your choices and that’s their right also.
This seems like a series of unresolvable dilemmas. There’s not much advice for that.
Consider posting in r/makemychoice
My way of dealing w this w my parents was to act like he was a rlly good friend and I’ve got his family’s support. So if we ever get married I tell them after bc I’m fucking eloping then having the ceremony. If I lose then I’ve got other family. But at the same time I discourage this way of handling things heavily.
Wtf. … he has no right to tell them.. how would you feel if he actually does that? It’s your moment and your choice…
Your partner threatening to out you is absolutely not ok. He should never, ever purposefully put you in a position where you feel unsafe. This person is not a safe person for you OP. You need to find somewhere else to live.
Your “boyfriend” is blackmailing you. How can you live with that?
Your bf has crossed the line. He can make suggestions but the decision should be yours and yours alone to make.
If I were you, I would just tell them myself.
If they cannot accept you for who you are, honestly F them..
I’m not gay but had other issues with my father, I clearly told him, I want nothing to do with you anymore, not now, not in the future, and I don’t care if I ever receive anything from you ( he is actually wealthy ).
Don’t let your choices be influenced by money, you need money to live alright, but it won’t make you happy, being yourself and living the life you want to live will bring you true happiness.