This just happened like an hour ago, I’m too afraid to message anybody I know because I don’t know how to feel or what I want from this relationship here forward.
My cat has been getting into the trash and searching the sink for any left over food and it’s a problem because he’s a kitten and won’t eat his cat food if he eats human food. My bf thinks the way to stop him is by scaring him away from the trash/benches. I do push my cat away or give him a little fright if I see him near those things but my bf takes it as far as hitting him, grabbing him by the scruff and pushing him off benches harshly. No matter how much I express that I hate how hard and rough he is on the cat, he always denies he’s being rough and says it’s how he has to learn. I don’t believe this is the way but I don’t know what else to do about the issue I’m actively trying to find new ways to protect my cat from the trash and sink.
Well today the cat got into the trash and pulled out a chicken bone and ran under the deck with it. I was in the bedroom on my phone my bf was out in the rest of the house and he saw it. Bf comes into the room and tells me what the cat did then tells me that he shot the cat with the bb gun. I’m just in shock. I was in the bedroom so I didn’t hear a thing I didn’t know what happened. He tells me that it didn’t hurt the cat and only scared him. My bf has two guns and both of them aren’t real guns but I don’t know what they are, what they’re for, if they’ll hurt when getting shot with, I don’t know anything about them. I don’t know what he just shot my cat with I don’t know what a bb gun is. There’s no marks on my cat at all and he seems fine but I’m absolutely not okay with this. I haven’t said a word to my bf since this has happened because I don’t know what to say. He’s going to justify shooting the fucking cat and I won’t be able to tell him how wrong it is. He wouldn’t do it to his own fucking cat he treats mine so cruel. He always joked about shooting the cat which I hated, I thought it wouldn’t become a joke anymore and I was right.
I just don’t know if I am overreacting but I know this is now how I want my cat to be treated. Maybe he should be scared away from the trash and sink, but not shot under a deck with a BB gun after the incident has already happened. I don’t know where to go from this, who to tell, what to say to my boyfriend.
Is there anybody I should tell about this? Or what would you say to my bf if you were me?
TLDR: My cat keeps getting into the trash/sink for food, My bf thinks the best way to stop him is to scare him, and shot him with a bb gun today because he got a chicken bone out the trash “to scare him”
EDIT: I’m 20F he is 29M I did that wrong in the title
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You should be calling the police, not posting on Reddit.
You should break up with this guy and never look back, OP.
He is abusing your cat. He will kill it, if you stay. Or your cat will get “lost”, because he intentionally lets it out, etc.
And he is also emotionally abusing you, by treating your cat this way and threatening it. Don’t think his abuse will be limited to your cat.
Why are you dating an almost 30 year old dude? I promise you, he is not looking for a healthy, respectful relationship with a 20 year old. He is looking for someone to control.
You’re under reacting. Leave. Yesterday. He shot an innocent kitten. Leave. He’s dangerous.
Your much-older bf is an asshole to your own cat, has joked about shooting it and now has “scared” it by shooting it with a bb gun? You think you’re overreacting here? And who to tell? What would your mom/your dad/your sis/your bro/your best friend say if you told them this?
>> grabbing him by the scruff and pushing him off benches harshly
Why you wanna stay with a person who thinks that harshly disciplining a young animal is super cool, neat and useful?
He thinks hurting living beings is the way to teach them.
That’s not the kind of person you want to be with, right?
call the police and leave him. LEAVE HIM!!! LEAVE HIM!!! If he will shoot and be violent with the cat he will do the same to you. The way he’s “disciplining” the cat is abusive already. Get yourself and your cat out of that situation. Take your cat the to the vet, if it was shot with anything, even if it left no marks it may have done internal damaged or hurt him a little. I’m not sure, i’m no vet, I would just do that to be safe and cover all bases. Please keep yourself and your cat safe. Don’t subject your kitty or yourself to that abuse. A good man would be gentle.
If someone tells you they are going to harm you or something you love, believe them. Not only is your BF exhibiting an extreme lack of empathy, but to put it plainly, he’s abusing your cat. If you were to have a kid with this man (assuming you don’t), how would he treat your kids? BB guns hurt. I’ve been shot by one, and I’m sure it could do significant damage to your cat. Please take your cat to the vet OP, and prioritize what’s best for you and your cat. You already feeling as though you can’t communicate this situation to him isn’t a good sign.
Psycho behavior
He’s nearly 30 and thinks this is honestly an okay reaction there is no fixing this. Begin an out plan now. Get the cat out first.
He will kill this animal eventually btw.
If animal cruelty isn’t a deal breaker for you, what is?
Break up and date someone your own age.. he has problems..
Please be safe! This man sounds dangerous
Your bf is too old for you and he has a screw loose. If I were you, I’d tell him “you freaked me out by shooting my kitten. I do not think we are right for each other. I don’t want to continue in a relationship with you. Please don’t argue about it. My mind is made up.”
Get rid of that dude today! Just think: if you have a child is he going to shoot it because they fill their diaper?
Call the fucking police are you kidding? Do something for your poor cat. You’re just as bad as him if you dont do anything!! Wow this breaks my heart
Um, we have a spray bottle of water that we’ve trained the cats with.
They are TERRIFIED of the spray bottle. Your boyfriend is a dumb@ss
If you don’t report it to the police and get the cat medical help you’re every bit as liable for animal cruelty as he is babe
Harm to animals can be a sign of committing potential violence towards humans.
File a police report and get yourself far away from this guy unless you want to be the subject of a true crime story.
The way people treat animals and waitstaff tells me a lot.
If someone—anyone—threatened to harm my animals I’d be done. He hasn’t just threatened, he has repeatedly been abusive and now he has literally shot your cat.
A BB gun likely won’t kill your cat if it’s hit on the body but hit in the head, eye, etc? Yeah. It could potentially kill them.
If he’s willing to do this to your pet, what do you think he will do to you to “teach you a lesson”? Or to kids if those are in the future?
The guy is an abusive asshole.
Make an exit plan.
People who will abuse their pets will abuse their children.
If you ever have children, god forbid, with this man, he will discipline them the same way. Also, you may end up on the receiving end when he gets frustrated with you. Please run as far and as fast as you can. You’ve got to love yourself enough to demand better for your one precious life.
couple of issues here
the age gap is insane. when did you and him start dating? and do you guys live together? just need clarification on that
the fact that he’s so aggressive with your pet and tells you that it’s how he has to learn rather than acknowledging your feelings and that he’s wrong is a major red flag. a man who will joke about shooting your pet and then actually shooting it will 100% hurt you as well and justify it the same way he justifies abusing your cat. he’s not dating a woman his age because she wouldn’t stay around long enough for it to get to this point and that’s why he’s dating someone your age.
you’re focused on what you need to say to him or who you need to call when what you need to be doing is coming up with an escape plan. serial killers start off by hurting animals too. do not ignore the glaring red flags in front of your face and end up in a documentary.
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Police won’t do anything, but still file a report when you can…you need to get away from him and protect your animal. It is not about you or your relationship right now, he will kill that animal. He sounds so horrible and will only escalate. Get your furry baby out of there.
He will kill you after he kills the cat. GET OUT.
If you allow this abuse of your cat, you are complicit in it. Report this to the cops and dump his ass!
Do you live together? Plan an exit. If he does this to your cat, it will escalate to you. Leave immediately if you can. If you don’t want the cops fine but know this is police worthy. Run. Far far away
Get the fuck away from him. He is an abuser. Today the kitten, tomorrow YOU.
This guy is a psycho. Beating an animal for wanting food is scary behavior. Please leave this guy and protect yourself & this sweet baby.
You have the world ahead of you, and he’s a predator in every sense of the word.
Get out and call police, he’s a murderer in the making, what a mongrel
You need to rehome that cat, because it’s being abused, its life is in danger and you are unwilling or unable to leave at this moment.
My cat died after being shot with a be gun. Leave this man alone he is horrible.
Uhm, you need to get somewhere safe and call the police. That guy is a loose cannon and that is illegal animal cruelty punishable by law.
He will eventually get worse, either hurting or killing animals or you or your children or unborn children.
You have your HUGE RED FLAG. Please pay attention. Your gut made you write the question. Please be safe and keep us posted on the thread. Good luck sweetie.
This is gonna seem harsh but you really shouldn’t own a pet if you aren’t going to protect them. Your boyfriend won’t change and if you won’t leave him you should re-home the cat.
If you remain in this relationship, you are condoning animal abuse. This is breakup worthy behavior. This man isn’t a safe partner. If you won’t protect yourself from him, then please at least be compassionate enough to rehome the kitten and swear off pets and children.
If you give me his address I’d love to show him how to not scare a cat and why this may have completely ruined the bond with a kitten. A grown man shooting a kitten …and you don’t think when shit hits the fan he’s not gonna put hands on you????? Knowing how he is why did you bring a kitten to your dysfunctional home
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WHY would you continue to keep a small animal, and yourself, around your boyfriend. he shot your cat. the cat might be fine. but I guarantee you since that didn’t work he’s going to escalate.
it is literally your job to protect the kitten. so do your job and walk away from this raging ass hat of a boyfriend
You are under reacting. Advocate for your cat, or find her another home.
Today, he’s abusive to animals. Soon, it’ll be you instead.
Getting shot with a bb gun HURTS. Your boyfriend abuses kittens. That’s such red flag behavior. This is absolutely not okay and if you can’t stop him from abusing a helpless animal then you need to rehome the cat. Either way you need to take action. Otherwise you’re complacent in the abuse.
For sure break up. This is an enormous red flag. Take the cat somewhere safe and go from there
You need to call the police and file a report then bump the boyfriend!
Do you want that for your cat, yourself and what about any kids you may have. this is animal abuse it’s chargeable by law as a felony get out now while you’re alive and your cats alive ,dumped the bastard. Why have you not already called the police?
He’s an abuser and not far from abusing you get out while you’re still alive and your cats alive I have no tolerance for animal abuse. You are better than this and it’s your job to protect your pets!
That poor fucking cat. Jesus christ find that poor baby a new home NOW. Don’t ‘try’ do it. It’s a defenseless animal and I guarantee that isn’t the first time he hurt the poor kitty
Animal cruelty is a felony. You should contact the police… and dump this guy. Seriously!! Personally I would choose the cat over him in a nanosecond. Also, abusers start off with animals and “graduate” to larger targets… you. He needs to go! An the cat needs a vet ASAP. Bullsh*t he didn’t hurt the cat!!
You need to take your cat and leave as soon as possible. Get friends or family or even the police to help you grab what you can and get out of there. This guy is violent, unstable, and completely unsafe for you to be around. He will kill your cat, and he may eventually kill you, too.
Break up with the creepy man who is almost 30 and shooting kittens, he is obviously awful. And keep your cat inside, there’s a lot less for them to get in trouble with indoors. Outdoor cats die really young for many reasons, including creepy old men with guns.
Tell your family that his behavior is both disturbing and makes you extremely uncomfortable. Explain to them that when you tried to break up with him before, he would not accept it. This behavior is screaming danger and you need help.
Yes, it’s scary to admit we need help sometimes. It’s very scary because you have to be vulnerable. Your family would rather you be safe than have you continue to live with him just because of your cat.
OP, if he will harm one living creature, who’s to say he won’t harm another? These things usually escalate. He knows he can behave this way because you are letting him. He knows you are afraid, he knows he can convince you to stay, he knows exactly how to keep you there. Please OP, tell your family.
You’re an asshole for letting him near the cat after the first time he put his hands on him. What the fuck are you expecting.
Take his cat and yours and LEAVE
Whatever happened to a water bottle wtf? I haven’t read past that first sentence cause I’m with you. I’d be OTD and never look back. That is criminal and cruel. What a sick-o!
You scare cats out of the trash with a squirt gun, not a bb gun. You can injure and kill cats with a bb gun. I’d leave him.
Today, he shoots the cat.
Some time later, he uses the BB gun on you.
Him using the gun on your cat shows how much he respects you and your belongings (which is not at all).
He’ll try to justify it as “teaching” the cat. That’s not teaching a cat to not dumpster dive.
And when he uses that BB gun on you, he’ll probably justify it or blame you for being in the way of the BB pellet.
He is not a safe person.
Please 🙏 🙏 🙏 PLEASE leave this man. Please. He’s going to hurt that poor kitty and you to. Please don’t ignore all these people telling you. Please. At the VERY least your cat is going to end up hurt and suffering, only worse from there. You shouldn’t want a man who can treat animals so cruelly. Its a huge red flag.
Animal abuse is a huge red flag, leave him. That is sick. You need to get him away from your cat as a pet owner it’s irresponsible to now allow him anywhere near any animal.
TELL Everyone you know he abused your pet, tell your family and get rid of him. Anyone who thinks that is a viable solution to a cat being a cat is sick in the head and on their way to a lot worse in life.
Personally I would be making a police report to cover myself because any act like that can escalate to more and a papertrail is important. Animal abuse is also criminal.
Fucking hell, shooting a small defenceless animal with a BB gun, it’s so much smaller than humans, it hurts as a human, imagine the pain he caused the poor thing!!
If he really shot your poor kitten, call the police and have him arrested for animal cruelty
Throw his stuff out and cut him off
Be careful. He’s dangerous
Listen: Look all the commenters in the eye, really absorb what we’re saying, and believe us when we tell you that he tried to kill your cat and he will try again.
You’re not safe, either. This is genuine violence. You need to take your cat and get out of there today or tomorrow. And don’t go back.
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I would say this relationship isn’t working for me, I’ll be back for my stuff on <insert date here> and I would take the cat & leave
And then when all my stuff is moved out id probably do something crazy like slash his tyers
You are terrible for even considering staying with a man that would shoot your cat with a BB gun.. like leave him bruh, he has no problem harming animals, what’s next? You? 😃 Like you are a terrible owner for allowing this to happen for so long, seriously ur poor cat dude.
You cannot stay with someone who will shoot your kitten.
The solution to keep your kitten out of the trash is to make the trash inaccessible, a locking lid or behind closed doors. If you want to dissuade the cat from certain behavior, you can use a WATERGUN, not a BB gun. A BB gun is a real gun. BBs are tiny metal balls. It can injure or even kill.
Take your kitten and leave this person.
Kick him the fuck out.
If you’re going to stay with an animal abuser please just give the kitten to someone who will actually take care of him. You don’t sound like the best pet owner yourself saying you give the kitten a fright to keep him out of the trash
OP, people that are cruel to animals are DISTURBED. DEEPLY DISTURBED.
Girlllll. Get that cat out of there and somewhere safe before it’s traumatized or dead. Then get yourself away from him. He’s willing to physically harm a young cat for “misbehaving”, what will he do to you or any future children if you make him angry?
Do not have kids with this man.
OP, don’t get down on yourself about protecting or re homing the cat – take your fucking cat & immediately rehome BOTH YOU & THE CAT ASAP PLEASE
Go ANYWHERE, community centre, shelter, even support groups online for DV/FV – they will be able to link you in with someone who will assist you in an exit plan. They will put you up somewhere for a few nights, they can help negotiate the cost if you cat has to go to an animal shelter or boarding kennel in the meantime. They can help with getting your belongings out of the house if you need- they will be your saving grace out of this situation!
Leave him for your own safety and that of your poor kitten. Imagine what he would do with a stubborn toddler!
Your boyfriend is dumber than a crock pot. Please keep him away from all animals AND children. Wow, your cat is an animal and is acting like one??? 😱😱😱🤯🤯🤯 Shocker! Imagine what will happen to you one day if you annoy your boyfriend enough.
You have friends, family, coworkers, law enforcement, etc. to advocate and protect you. Your cat only has you. Your cat relies on you for protection. You have been hopelessly failing as a cat parent by keeping it around a monster like your boyfriend. If you don’t break up with him, please give your cat to a shelter, so it can have a chance at a better life. You are enabling your cat’s abuse by keeping it around its abuser.
I foster cats in my spare time. They don’t respond to fear, but they do respond to repeated redirections. Obviously, scaring the poor cat will do nothing, but make it trust humans less and act out more.
As a guy with 3 cats, one of which is a little rascal like yours, this guy is for the garbage and is an awful human.
Genuinely what is wrong with you that you’re not protecting your child???? This is why your bf is 9 years older than you. Grow a backbone and protect what cannot defend itself.
It did hurt the cat. Your boyfriend is an abusive, sadistic animal hater. I have rescued two different cats with bb-s in their bodies. One had some that worked their way down close to his bones and had to be surgically removed. Shoot his bare skin with the gun and see if he has a reaction. Or let him shoot you with it and you will know for yourself. Take your cat and leave. Or at the very least take your pet out of the house so your boyfriend doesn’t have access to it. I hope this is a fake post from someone trying to make animal lovers angry.
If the kitten shows no ill effects from being shot, I’m going to assume it is an airsoft gun that shoots plastic bb’s. These can be powered by spring, electric or gas. Depending on the quality, they can be pretty harmless. If it is on the weaker side of the spectrum it probably startles the same way a spray bottle would.
I’d suggest requesting your boyfriend allows you to shoot him in the arm or stomach with it. It will give you an idea of how powerful it is or isn’t. It should also give your boyfriend a greater understanding of how much pain it may be inflicting on the kitten, which he might not be aware of.
OP, from your comments, it’s not just that the abuse of the cat will eventually extend to you, it already has.
You’re being manipulated and abused. You need to seek a women’s shelter ASAP or contact friends and family.
his aggression is escalating towards a literally defenseless kitten. He will kill your cat if you dont get him away from your (ex?) bf…
Take the cat to a shelter or reach out to an animal rescue group. Then take yourself to a shelter or contact a women’s rescue group. Neither of you are safe with this man. The only reason a man nearly thirty would date a woman barely twenty is to control her. You need to leave. Leave your stuff, it can be replaced, you can’t.
You and the cat need to get the hell away from him. He’s not a safe person. You’re underreacting.
Call the cops. That’s crazy behavior. You teach and train your animal. U don’t shoot them.
First of all, I’m sick of these age gap relationships. Every single one of them on here, the man is absolutely vile in all ways.
The situation at hand, you call the cops and get somewhere safe. What kind of violent sociopath shoots a cat/pet? Say hi to your BF Ted Bundy for me
Your bf thinks it’s okay to abuse animals. Folks like this typically think it’s okay to abuse humans as well. End this relationship immediately for you and your cat’s safety.
You are too young to know there is something very wrong with this guy. Keep the cat and ghost the bf.
The single biggest predictor that signals someone will be violent towards people is that he has previously been violent towards animals. Not only is your cat not safe, you’re not safe either. If I were you, I’d get out of there.
Wow he’s an abusive AH. Why are you with him??
This is the clearest indication that this is not the relationship for you. I’m horrified and disgusted about this. OP, someone who casually hurts an animal like that is dangerous. Do you both live together?
Someone who would casually hurt a child or an animal is a POS.
If this was me I’d be grabbing my cat and belongings and never look back. But if you do leave, do it safely.