This feels weird asking. But … I (22F) have been with my bf (24M) for just over a year. He’s usually sweet, but lately he’s been acting like everything I do is “too flirty” or “too attention-seeking.” I’m literally just my normal self, joking around, being playful, dressing how I like, chatting with people, having fun, but he reacts like I’m trying to cross some invisible line.
I love him, but it’s exhausting to feel like I constantly have to censor my personality. I don’t want to start fights over nothing, but I also don’t want to lose the parts of me that make me… me.
How can I be myself around him without it turning into a fight every time?
TL;DR: I love my bf of a year, but he freaks out over me being my normal flirty/fun self. How do I stay myself without constant arguments?
Comments
You don’t shrink yourself to be with a man. If he doesn’t like it he can go. Or you can go.
If he doesn’t trust your intentions because of his insecurities, there’s nothing YOU can do to change that. He would have to see an issue with his behavior and actually want to change, it doesn’t seem like that’s the case.
The bar is in hell. Why are you doing this to yourself? If your boyfriend hates who you really are, what’s the point of being in a relationship with him?
The quote “if I’m too much, go find less” comes to mind.You’re sooooooooo young, you don’t need to put up with someone fighting with you every time you show a bit of personality. Unless you are blatantly flirting with other people in front of him, dressing provocatively for attention from other people, or disrespecting your relationship in other ways, I don’t see anything wrong with who you are. The right person will love you for who you are. Tell him he can accept all of you or hit the road.
Seems like he’s more serious about the relationship than you imo.
>How do I stay myself without constant arguments?
Find a new bf.
Seriously – if this just started happening, I’d be looking closer at him for why he’s suddenly so worried about you being too flirty.