My bf (27m) has a burner ig and TikTok account following 1.4k and I (24f) don’t know what to do

r/

So I’ve always known he had a burner account for porn and when we first started dating three years ago I was fine with it. Tbh I think bc I was young and it was my first ever relationship I never really processed how I actually would feel with porn in a relationship, but now that I’m older I am more turned off from the idea of him following a bunch of porn accounts.

Ultimately too I had seen that he was searching up women he knows irl, and a specific woman who we both know. I also have seen before he had commented on one of the porn girls accounts pictures (on his burner). And once I brought up the fact that he followed over 1400 people on his backup TikTok and he tried to be like “oh it must be accidental follows” when I said how much it kept increasing.

All this to say I have a problem with this behavior. It’s not the porn watching it’s the porn lifestyle. I mainly want to figure out how to talk to him about me not being comfortable with him following sm other accounts as well as engaging with them but I’m not sure how?

Comments

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  2. BaconHammer9000 Avatar

    easy – give him an ultimatum

    either he goes porn-free and begins attending church with you twice a week or you dump him.

    problem solved one way or another!

  3. DistraughtDaddyo Avatar

    You said it yourself- this was all there when you started dating him. You should have thought through this before .

    No offense but I sincerely doubt Any of this is going to change.

  4. Advanced-Sandwich159 Avatar

    I think this is actually very fair.

    I think your statement it’s not necessarily porn, but the “porn lifestyle” that bothers you is all you need to say.

  5. Spare_Firefighter999 Avatar

    I dated and eventually married someone with a porn addiction (before TikTok and IG though).
    It just gave me a life of bad sex cause they weren’t worried about my enjoyment during anything intimate and it was miserable. 

    It doesn’t go away. Just the truth

  6. GlitterBitch99 Avatar

    engaging with them is cheating for me personally