I (20F), started dating my boyfriend (22M) a little less than a month ago. Yesterday I mentioned that while getting clean is obviously the priority, showering is more ritualistic for me and I like how the hot water feels. It’s just relaxing Idk, not the point. Anyways he responds by saying that he agrees, and that he doesn’t usually wash his body with soap when he gets into the shower and kind of just lets it run over him. But he does make a point to wash his hair. I was internally shocked. Appalled if you will. But I just kind of stayed calm and asked him how does he get all the dead skin and bacteria off of him if he doesn’t use soap or body wash, and he replied that he uses a loofah and scrubs. With just water. He just scrubs with water. And he said that on special occasions he’ll use body wash if he wants to spell particularly nice. I genuinely don’t know how to handle this, I’m a little bit grossed out.
My Bf just told me he doesn’t wash with soap and Idk what to do.
r/Advice
Comments
Buy him soap and put in his shower. Take a shower with him and use the soap. Problem solved.
Honestly it’s kinda gross, but water and a loofah scrub (provided he is swapping the loofah regularly) probably does 80% of the job.
Its just the germs and bacteria you have to worry about.
That should be your ex tbh
My mom doesn’t either… it’s odd but she’s okay and doesn’t smell bad.. idk some people don’t like soap that’s all I got
good luck with the UTIs
If you end up with frequent UTI’s or yeast infections you will know why.
All men know it’s only pits, balls and ass. Water does the rest.
I understand in theory it’s gross, but you have been with him for a month. If you have not noticed anything off until now, is he really doing anything wrong?
The bar is in hell the bar is in hell the bar is in hell
Many just use soap on their face and the stinky parts, armpits, crotch and booty.
Please tell him he needs to wash his junk. If he doesn’t, please don’t have sex (if you are of age for that). This includes his ass. It isn’t about smell, it’s about health. He can get really sick if that area isn’t kept clean, and so can you if you are touching him.
The rest isn’t AS important (but obviously he should still be washing)
Maybe ask him WHY he doesn’t want to use soap? I know for me, I have really sensitive skin and most soap irritates it, or dries it out so much it’s gross after. I’ve struggled to find products that work for me my whole life.
Buy him an unscented/gentle body wash for everyday use. Does he use deodorant everyday? The build up under his pits 😷
The amount of people in this sub who make similar posts is beyond belief.