Hey everyone! Please enlighten me on this dilemma!
So today my boyfriend was pressuring me to allow him to take my MacBook to use for work since his broke. I said no!! He threw a tantrum and we basically came to the conclusion that I’d allow him to use my laptop only at my house. I wasn’t in, but since I was basically manipulated into allowing him to use it, I had to trust him and told him to primarily use it for work, and not to go through it. (Not that I have anything to hide!).
He texted me to let me know when I’m on my way home, and then by the time I arrived home, he had left and blocked me on everything! And I mean everything! Come to realise that he had gone through my chatGPT conversations about how he had been treating me.
Who’s in the wrong here? I just feel completely set up. He was even having a go at me beforehand as he felt the reason I wasn’t giving the laptop to him was because I couldn’t trust him!
Any insight and perspectives into this would be fab
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Hey everyone! Please enlighten me on this dilemma!
So today my boyfriend was pressuring me to allow him to take my MacBook to use for work since his broke. I said no!! He threw a tantrum and we basically came to the conclusion that I’d allow him to use my laptop only at my house. I wasn’t in, but since I was basically manipulated into allowing him to use it, I had to trust him and told him to primarily use it for work, and not to go through it. (Not that I have anything to hide!).
He texted me to let me know when I’m on my way home, and then by the time I arrived home, he had left and blocked me on everything! And I mean everything! Come to realise that he had gone through my chatGPT conversations about how he had been treating me.
Who’s in the wrong here? I just feel completely set up. He was even having a go at me beforehand as he felt the reason I wasn’t giving the laptop to him was because I couldn’t trust him!
Any insight and perspectives into this would be fab
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I think him finding out ending up being a blessing. You did say you used ChatGPT about how he’s been treating you.
>chatGPT conversations about how he had been treating me
So he’s been treating you bad, and then got mad that you were trying to process things? Take this as a good thing, heal and move on, No one needs that bullshit in their life.
Would he rather you asked someone you knew instead of AI? Lol if him seeing you question whether he’s treating you okay is reason enough for him to leave then good riddance. Sounds like the trash took itself out.
Is this the same guy you posted about two months ago? Because seriously let this fish go!!!!
I mean, he was right, you can’t trust him..
He proved it.
Sounds like whatever you were “discussing” with chatGPT must’ve been accurate for him to respond like that.
I think we have a right to seek help for our relationship problems. Chat would have never exacerbated your conflict but might have made you feel validated for feeling certain emotions. If your boyfriend didn’t like that, well, it happened that he did x and you felt y. A nicer reaction might have been , ooh I have to repair my relationship . Too hard for him, the rubbish took itself out.
Think about it this way: in my head, this is the same as talking about him to your friend or something—and him reading that conversation. You’re allowed to process things and ask other people about certain situations, especially because your judgment can get cloudy when you’re in love with someone. It helps to get perspective from someone who isn’t emotionally involved. In this case, it’s just ChatGPT—but still, he seriously crossed boundaries, I feel.
Block him right back and move on. You did nothing wrong. He did everything wrong. Those are private communications like a diary or conversation with your therapist. He violated your trust, your privacy, and his role.
Sounds like the trash took itself out and you can just be glad he did and you don’t have to live with how he’s been treating you any longer. Speaking of which, you should have thrown him out and told him to fuck off when he threw a tantrum for any reason.
Not to mention, his work is responsible for his work laptop and I highly doubt they’d let an unsecured device on the corporate network. It was all likely a lie just to do what he did.
Question – How did you find out exactly what he had gone through on your laptop? There aren’t access logs on ChatGPT logs.
3 big issues here,
1 – Him pressuring you to use your laptop when you did not want to lend it to him. No is a complete sentence.
2 – Him abusing the privilege of being allowed use of your laptop and snooping. Total invasion of privacy.
3 – Biggest issue. This man found out you turned to fucking AI because he was treating you so badly, and his reaction wasn’t to, I don’t know, feel bad?! Heartbreaking that you didn’t have a real person to confide in, but that his treatment was so bad that you looked to a computer for support.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Dump this loser. Make space for something positive.
Did he leave the laptop behind when he left? Change your locks and good riddance. He sounds like a loser.
It seems to me the trash took itself out. If you have been struggling with how he’s been treating you then you already have your answer. He might have many qualities you find attractive but this behavior is ugly and repulsive. Let him go and check your laptop for spyware and change your passwords.
I love when the trash takes itself out! Block him back and move on.
Just be thankful that he’s gone.
Ghost him, because he can’t be trusted. Then invite his best friend over for dinner and a movie. Problem solved.
Sometimes the trash does take itself out.
Let him.
Congratulations! The trash took itself out!
I mean…you have to ask AI about how he’s treating you. I could not have possibly read that right. If you have to use AI to understand your relationship than either you or he have NO self respect.
He sounds like an asshole for pressuring you to do something you don’t want to do. Then he breaks your trust. Just let him go and move on.
Ok. First thing I will say – Using chat GPT as a pseudo therapist is kinda genius lol. At first I thought that’s weird but the more I thought, the more genius I realized it is. 2nd – if I saw my significant other messaging chat GPT about my behavior, I’d be super introspective and think on the things I’ve done and work to get better. This guy seems like he wanted to find a reason to do exactly this – good riddance. He’s a giant baby if that’s his response
You’re not wrong. And this is nuanced. But I will never understand not giving your partner your personal devices. It wouldn’t matter if you knew there wasn’t stuff to worry about.
IN A PERFECT WORLD, you would’ve already had this conversation. But in a less than perfect world, you would’ve let him have access but prefaced it with a conversation about you already doubting your relationship. But hindsight is 20/20.
Moving forward depends on your emotions and his responses.
I don’t think it’s done yet. But you two need to work on communication
For god’s sake, the man’s a menace. Just be glad he cut himself out of your life so you didn’t have to do it.
I live alone and have my laptop password protected. Anyone is free to use the guest account. Now worries. I maintain privacy. Gives me a small sense of security.
You found out you can’t trust him and he doesn’t trust you. Proceed cautiously.
I think the trash took itself out. Don’t let it come crawling back in.
Just thank God that he left without your prompting.
Congratulations on losing a loser 👏
Did you a big favor! Outed himself as far as trust and he saw you had his number as regards not treating you well, and realized the gig was up on being an AH.
The trash took itself out. Good fucking riddance.
Well you were setup by your Ex BF (I hope he’s Ex}.
Reading your post it kinda looks he was shopping for a reason to breakup and blame it on you.
I’m gonna guess if you were to send him a msg and say you are done with him, you’d not get any push back.
Move along, embrace the suck of it all. And be strong in front of him and act like it doesn’t matter what he does. That my dear… Will kill him internally. Hurt with a trusted friend or privately, but don’t you dare show one millagram of hurt to him.
Dad to a 27F. She is strong, independent and knows how to deal with asshats like your Ex…
If you can’t trust your boyfriend enough to not warn him before lending you laptop, then why are you in this relationship?
Seriously, my husband and I have used each other’s computers for various reasons over the years, and we’ve never had to say “don’t go through xyz thing” to each other. We simply respect each other’s privacy and don’t!
Sounds like you got away scot
-free! (Oh gosh is that troublesome phrase? Now I need to look that up. )
Now to make sure he didn’t take anything. Or place anything.
(Edit: it just means not having to pay a tax. Phew!)
He’s treating you poorly and you’re upset because he blocked you?? He’s an awful person who lies and can’t be trusted and obviously there are other issues if you’ve been having conversations about how he’s been treating you. Is this the bf that you said you broke up with a couple of months ago? If so, why did you get back with him? Have some self respect. Trust your instincts.
Also, create a second account/profile on your computer for others to use. That way, they won’t have access to your files or browser history or anything.
Let him go. This behavior is wrong and childish. You are avoiding a bad long-term issue.
Cool story
Move on from him and quickly. All the red flags are there.
In the future set up a guest profile on your laptop and you don’t have to worry about someone going thru it.
Don’t sound like you lost anything important
So you’re saying the trash LITERALLY took itself out?
Well good riddance. If he’s not ok with U chatting to chatgpt he is too controlling