We have been dating for 2.5 years. I just started a new job in July, and this week I’m in Switzerland for onboarding at our company’s headquarters.
Each night, different people from the team have taken me out for dinner/drinks to get to know me and show me the city—it’s normal for first visitors. The night before last I went with two female coworkers. Last night I went with four male coworkers (three of whom are married or in relationships). It was company-paid, nothing inappropriate happened, and I made it clear I have a boyfriend.
I got back around 11 PM after a long dinner because that’s part of the European culture. I had 3 drinks in 4 hours, no one was drunk. When I got home, my boyfriend asked who I went with, and I told him. He had a huge problem with the dinner and was pretty mad.
He asked to see my messages with coworkers (which were only work related) and said I wasn’t upfront enough. But during the duration of my trip he hasn’t once asked me about any other dinners but this specific night.
For context, He frames it as a concern but it’s more like insecurity. I’ve never been disloyal, I barely interact with other men outside of work and this trip was purely to be introduced and meet the team as a new employee. He was mad when I didn’t say what he wanted to hear and hasn’t talked to me since the argument. I figured he would grow out of this behavior since it start at the beginning of our relationship and I’m exhausted.
Is his reaction valid?
TL;DR On a work trip abroad for my new job, I went to dinner with four male coworkers. My boyfriend says it wasn’t right and I feel differently.