I (25F) met my BF (24M) 3 years ago in college and we split up due to being distracted with school. He never really had friends nor was he really known around campus at all and the only people that did know him never had anything positive to really say about him unfortunately. Hate to say it, but he was kind of the butt of every joke back then and nobody took him seriously. Not just in college, but he grew up just kind of a loner as well. He’s still like this today. At that time, he was always trying to convince me he’s popular and everyone likes him (I knew none of that was true but I never said anything because I didn’t wanna hurt his feelings).
Fast forward from 2022 to now, we reconnected recently and he’s constantly telling me stories that I know NEVER happened. For example he’ll constantly come up with scenarios where girls are always hitting on him, calling him handsome, fighting over him, flirting with him etc, claiming even guys always hype him up and say he gets hundreds of girls. Not to say that’s hard to believe considering he’s a conventionally attractive guy and quite tall. But like I can just tell the stories are so fake and dragged out and made up. He’s constantly trying to give me the impression that he’s somebody that I know he’s not and I just want to know why you guys might think he tries so hard to make himself seem like he’s this really super cool person that everyone wants to be? Especially when I know for a fact that isn’t the case.
Because it’s just really odd and I questioned the idea that he may either be incredibly insecure or a compulsive liar, but these stories are so detailed yet fake that I feel like he’s just mentally ill….I know that sounds harsh, but I was wondering if there’s something deeper psychologically that I may be missing? Can someone tell me what may be the reasoning behind these exaggerated random stories?
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…and you’re dating a narcissistically compulsive liar because?
That’s adorable. Tell him to grow the fuck up, there’s no mental illness that does that
I have a friend that’s like this, for that reason i’ve grown apart. But over the time getting to know him, part of it seems to come from how he was raised, but most seems to be from an insecurity standpoint. He always said things that were debunked by others, and I concluded it was because he felt the need to compensate and fantasize versions of himself that weren’t real. It sometimes came across as somewhat narcissistic, trying to make himself seem more powerful or wanted, or even respected. He was a very “by-the-book” guy, that one guy that didn’t have many friends in hs or college, the “you must be fun at parties” kinda guy.