My boyfriend died a week ago in a car accident and I found out I was pregnant yesterday. I’m still weighing my options between keeping the baby or aborting it but both of them are heavy decisions I’m still thinking about.
I’m 17 and he was 17 as well. Both of our parents are strict Christian’s who have strong values. I don’t feel like his parents have liked me this whole time but I really hope that his death would bring us closer in a way.
Ultimately I’m struggling to tell our parents, I don’t think they’ll be that mad because they’re still grieving him but of course it’s still a struggle.
Comments
Do you want to be a teen mom as a single parent? If no, then no need to tell his parents.
I think it would be better if you told his parents, because I seriously doubt they would reject they only child from their son, also you should probably discuss it with his mom, maybe then you would figure a way to tell Your parents , i know it would be difficult but at least you would have someone to support you
When you’re ready, be honest with them. bringsomeone you trust if you can. this is your decision, and you deserve support no matter what.
If you’re considering not keeping the baby, it may be best not to tell them at all. You might find his parents especially wanting you to keep it so they can cling to his memory. That may seem like a sweet idea right now, but the reality is that it’s your life this would change completely, and they would only be babysitters who can move away or decline to help out at any moment. You would be on your own providing and caring for a child 24/7 for the next 20 years or so. That’s longer than you can remember and longer than you have lived.
Watch the movie how to deal with Mandy Moore, it’s about exactly what you’re going through. I’m so sorry about your loss, this is an unfathomable situation.
Make your own decision first. You don’t want pressure left and right when you make a decision that will affect the rest of your life.
Please take your time.
Take the time to consider what path YOU want to take. You’re in a position where these adults will try taking the decision away from you. Take your time.
ETA: I’m very sorry for your loss and theirs 🙁
Keep it
You’re only 17. You need an education and a decent job before you start a family.
Get an abortion and enroll in school.
No need to tell either family.
Wow, do you have anyone you trust that you can talk to before you talk to your parents?
Good Luck
I would wait to share. Decide what you want and make YOUR decision first. You have a lot to consider. I’m so very sorry for your loss. Choose one close, trusted friend and counseling is in order.
I am sorry for your loss which makes this decision even harder for you.
Do what is best for you and find a mental health counselor to work through this.
My only advice is if you choose to have an abortion – don’t tell his parents.
I say trust your gut
Your late boyfriends parents being very religious increases the odds they will try to pressure you into having the baby. Be kind to yourself as you make a decision. Don’t share information with people who will not agree with you when you are in such a vulnerable state. Find someone you can trust to talk to.
Whatever you decide to do, don’t let yourself regret it. Stick to your guns. There is no right answer here. It’s your call, and once you make it, stick with it and don’t second guess what could have been.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
I can’t imagine how hard this is, but if you don’t think you’ll keep it, it’s really best not to tell anyone.
Please know that if you’re early in it, you can even take medication, if you choose not to keep it. Use a web browser in incognito mode, even if you’re in a safe state. Delete this post, too, just to be safe.
I had an abortion doing a D&C medical procedure. It truly felt like the way a skinned knee feels, but on the inside. Very minimal recovery time needed.
A friend of mine went the pill route. The cramping was about at the top end of her regular period cramping.
There are organizations that can help you, look up the auntie network.
FTR, I’m not advocating that you should get one, but if you do, I wanted to give you an idea of what you’d feel physically.
I would urge you to think about how you would raise your kiddo, how it would impact future schooling and your financial stability and if you would have support from your family and/or your boyfriends family or if they would shame you.
It’s a lot to deal with, and I’m so sorry you have to do that on top of everything else.
I hope you can take care of yourself and dig deep to figure out what works best for you.
whatever you do, decide for yourself. don’t let anyone do it for you