I’m 19 f he’s 28 m. I met him when I was an adult and we were in a friend group together. I don’t think I was groomed. I can’t even put words together right now. But he has full control of this relationship. I don’t even have his phone number. He leaves as he pleases and then tries to act like he’s just taking space when he is actually just trying to manipulate me into feeling bad about standing up to his abusive behavior. He does it all the time. For so many different things. I don’t know how to leave though. I’m chronically ill and cannot work much so I’m dependent and he knows that. Please help. I’m so exhausted. I have had a lifetime of trauma and just want someone to love me.
My boyfriend is emotionally abusive and I don’t know what to do
r/Advice
Comments
Do you have any family who could help? Hope things get better
You should break up with your abusive boyfriend
I’m so sorry you’re in this you do not deserve to feel trapped or controlled. It is abuse. Please reach out to someone you trust a friend, family, or a local women’s shelter they can help you plan a safe way to leave. You are not alone. You deserve real love and safety. If you want, I can help you find resources near you too. 💙
You poor thing. I think you know deep down this isn’t love. He sounds dreadful. Do you have a support system of family or friends at all?
Look up women’s services and shelters.
Are you still in touch with your parents?
You are being held as a victim, a play thing, a subordinate. There is no point in standing up for yourself to him directly, it could be dangerous. If he “punishes” you by leaving for a while that could certainly play into your escape plan. However, he is likely monitoring you. You need to cover your tracks, delete your history, you should honestly be worried he will find this post. He could monitor your calls. You have a big life ahead of you, you need to get out of this before he becomes physically abusive, which I’m sure is next. Good luck!
Contact local women’s services including YWCA if you have a local chapter.