My boyfriend is stressed and idk how to help

r/

So, My (25F) boyfriend (27M) have been together for more than a year and have been friends, dating, and whatever transition that was for more and have been long distance ever since. The thing is, lately he has been really stressed with work. He’s not saying it but he’s extra tired when he comes home from work, sometimes he gets home way too late due to work emergencies, and there are a lot of circumstances where all he could do once he arrives home is clean up and fall straight to bed after his shift. I won’t say his occupation but let’s just say that it is both mentally and physically taxing and it has been taking a toll in his body. His health hasn’t been good these past few months and he has been getting ill frequently and won’t even recover as fast as before. I’ve told him to take it easy and that his health matters to me more than anything. I also always tell him that I am proud of him and that I appreciate him but idk if that is enough. Also, I do let him play his games for as long as he want even if we barely have enough time to talk due to the time zones. But how do I even support him? He doesn’t want me sending him anything. He doesn’t like it when I spend my money for him so sending him gifts or little trinkets and snacks wouldn’t be on the list. I’m lost. Idk how to ease my Boyfriend’s stress and somehow I feel like I add to it even. He’s not talking too much about it even and Idk if he is trying not to worry me or if he simply doesn’t want to tell.

Thank you in advance for all the advice you guys will give. I will especially be thankful to guy who might give me a perspective on how you men think about stuffs like this.

Comments

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    Backup of the post’s body: So, My (25F) boyfriend (27M) have been together for more than a year and have been friends, dating, and whatever transition that was for more and have been long distance ever since. The thing is, lately he has been really stressed with work. He’s not saying it but he’s extra tired when he comes home from work, sometimes he gets home way too late due to work emergencies, and there are a lot of circumstances where all he could do once he arrives home is clean up and fall straight to bed after his shift. I won’t say his occupation but let’s just say that it is both mentally and physically taxing and it has been taking a toll in his body. His health hasn’t been good these past few months and he has been getting ill frequently and won’t even recover as fast as before. I’ve told him to take it easy and that his health matters to me more than anything. I also always tell him that I am proud of him and that I appreciate him but idk if that is enough. Also, I do let him play his games for as long as he want even if we barely have enough time to talk due to the time zones. But how do I even support him? He doesn’t want me sending him anything. He doesn’t like it when I spend my money for him so sending him gifts or little trinkets and snacks wouldn’t be on the list. I’m lost. Idk how to ease my Boyfriend’s stress and somehow I feel like I add to it even. He’s not talking too much about it even and Idk if he is trying not to worry me or if he simply doesn’t want to tell.

    Thank you in advance for all the advice you guys will give. I will especially be thankful to guy who might give me a perspective on how you men think about stuffs like this.

    I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

  3. Separate-Cheek-2796 Avatar

    Fixing his stress is not your job. I understand your concern about him, but part of the growing-up process is learning how to handle your feelings. He’s doing his best right now. Send him love and wish him well. Pray for him if it would make you feel better.