I (25F) have PCOS and get brutal, irregular periods. My boyfriend (28M) has always been weird about it. He acts like I’m exaggerating when I can’t get out of bed, or when I cancel plans because I’m curled up in pain.
Last month, he told me he thought I was “being dramatic.” He even said he read online that women “milk it” for attention.
Cue me being furious.
But this month? It got worse.
He confessed,while laughing that he set up a small motion-activated camera in our living room to prove I was “moving around fine” when I said I was too sick to meet his family for dinner.
When I confronted him, he said he deleted the footage (I don’t believe him) and said I was “violating his trust by overreacting.”
I packed a bag and left that night.
Guess who’s now single and filing a report.
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Backup of the post’s body: I (25F) have PCOS and get brutal, irregular periods. My boyfriend (28M) has always been weird about it. He acts like I’m exaggerating when I can’t get out of bed, or when I cancel plans because I’m curled up in pain.
Last month, he told me he thought I was “being dramatic.” He even said he read online that women “milk it” for attention.
Cue me being furious.
But this month? It got worse.
He confessed,while laughing that he set up a small motion-activated camera in our living room to prove I was “moving around fine” when I said I was too sick to meet his family for dinner.
When I confronted him, he said he deleted the footage (I don’t believe him) and said I was “violating his trust by overreacting.”
I packed a bag and left that night.
Guess who’s now single and filing a report.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Good. This is only the beginning of the things he will do to attempt to control you.
No matter what good traits he has, let someone else deal with him. There are good men out there.
Fugg that guy in particular. You’re better off
AI
“Filing a report” to whom, about what? The police, about the spy cam?
That kind of dude is dangerous and unsafe to be around. I am very proud of you for seeing that and leaving. Please stay safe 💗
Kick his crazy but out. This is crazy. This is not normal. There is no excuse for that. Imagine when he does that just because of your period pain, what else is he going to do whenever he doesn’t trust you?
oh……my god! lmao what the fuck?!
I bet you a thousand Internet points that his research into women faking their pain was making a post on the ask men subreddit.
Holy shit.
Your boyfriend secretly set up a hidden camera, he laughed about it, dismissed your pain, and accused you of overreacting when confronted.
This was a serious violation of your trust and privacy – potentially illegal and very abusive behavior. You made the right decision by leaving and filing a report. You’re not overreacting, you’re protecting yourself from someone controlling and disrespectful.
Stay safe xxx
Glad this isn’t a “what should I do” post because you did exactly what you should have done.
Fellow PCOS girly here! This is infuriating from an outsider’s perspective so I can only imagine how you must be feeling. I’m so sorry this happened to you but good for you for taking the steps you need for yourself!
“fILiNg a rEpOrT”
This sounds like AI. But it also isn’t illegal to put a camera in your own living room.
He’s an asshole, but I’d be surprised if the cops do anything about it
I think he’s faking loving you.
This is so totally unnecessary and mean spirited that I have hardly the words to be offended on your behalf.
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
THANK you for being smart and leaving his butt, so many woman wouldn’t do that!
Stay single until you can find an understanding man, maybe one who has a mom and sisters who have had horrible periods! You probably have endometriosis. It’s horribly painful, I had a lot benign cyst on both ovaries too and had to have a hysterectomy!
Men can never really understand our pain unless they get a kidney stone, then they’ll get know!
My daughter also has PCOS… if she ever told me someone did this to her I’d probably end up in jail an hour later. What a sick pos.
Saying that YOU were violating his trust after he set up hidden cameras is WILD. 💀
Good for you on walking away. No one deserves to be questioned that way. What a outrageous thing to do. There’s something seriously wrong with him.
Good. Because what he did violated your trust and privacy.
Good for you, girl!
Should probably get checked out. There are ways to improve it.
There is help for pcos. Get that checked out.
Ah yes, you are clearly the one violating trust here.
🤣 Dump the dude girl, this is just a droplet in a sea of violence and abuse he could be capable of when things don’t go his way.
Run and never look back – seriously
Girl, he really said you violated his trust after spying on you with a hidden camera? That’s not just toxic, that’s unhinged. File that report and never look back.
[ Removed by Reddit ]
Thanks god finally a story where the woman is not trying to find excuses to their shitty boyfriends.
He’s fallen down the alpha bro rabbit hole. RUN… Edited to say good job for running
Good for you!
Flippin Eck people are seeing AI everywhere except sometimes when it is AI. Someone who’s not confident in their writing might use chat GTP but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true.
I’m so sorry that happened but so glad you’re safe and knew to get the hell away from him. It goes beyond creepy, it’s a huge indicator what he could go on to do
Seriously concerning behavior. What is up with women-hating men not believing women when they say they are in pain?? Are we going back to the 50s where men diagnosing any woman who disagrees with “female hysteria”?
We live in dangerous times ladies, take care of one another and stay away from dudes who show these signs.
If he went online, researched, bought and setup a secret camera, you can be sure he picked up air tags too. Please get your phone and car checked for shared locations / trackers etc. Stay safe!
Good for you for leaving. PCOS already gives you enough pain to add that POS pain to your life.
He sounds like he is jealous lol.
Co mph
This is horrifying. Please tell me you left OP and don’t turn back. This is INSANE. The world of alpha males and its content will be felt for generations.
Yeah, your lies need to stop.
Good for you getting out. My ex hid his old cell phone under our bed when I was home alone and recorded me without me knowing with a live feed video camera. They always get worse.
Violating his trust by overreacting?
What the hell kind of stupid is this guy?
Dump him! But before you do, get one of those things that simulate period pain and put it on him, I guarantee he doesn’t even last on the lowest level 😤
My trans daughter says that period pain feels like the aftermath of being kicked in the balls. And that’s just regular period pain.
I came here ready to say “drop the man, sis” and I’m so glad you already did!!
Good for you! I was almost expecting you to end with AITA
Imagine what would he do when you have a medical emergency or even get pregnant and would need constant care. If he is not willing to understand the pain you go through during periods, he would not care even then. You are better off without him.
yeah that’s a fucking nightmare. i am so sorry.
My dad and brother used to laugh at me when I would be in the fetal position from period pain and used the lovely excuse that other people don’t act like that when on their period. Cue me decades later getting an ablation during another surgery when they found out I had endo. I finally have what are likely pretty average periods (although occasionally I have some reminders of the torture periods from my past).
No one gets to tell you how to deal with your condition (especially someone who has never had it). I don’t have PCOS but I have a friend who does and looking from the outside in it looks brutal. Please know you should have people who lovingly support you in whatever way you want and need. This guy started with the dismissive attitude and messages before he ended with the absolute invasion of privacy of recording you living your life.
Proud of you for leaving and filing that report!
I’m a man, and very gay, but holy shit, what an asshole. I’m sorry you’re going through this.
I have also heard that taking ginger on a daily basis can reduce the severity of menstrual symptoms. It might not work for everyone, and I don’t know if the effect would be helpful to someone with PCOS, but there’s a chance you might be a person who responds well to ginger. (I’m too lazy to Google them right now but I’ve seen some legit studies about this topic if you want to research it further)
Your violating HIS trust????
Oh god, I’m so glad you ended this post stating you are single. How horrific.
Well done for leaving his ass, that is not a normal behavior.
It is not the first time someone told me i was exagerating for attention, i too have PCOS, and even my ex told me that a kick in the balls hurts more than giving birth, so i dont know what real hurt is. I left him and my now boyfriend buys me chocolate,hand me pain killers and heated blankets for the pain. He nnever tells me i am overreacting and even holds me when i am in the bathroom with nauseas because of the pain.
I say this to tell you that there is ALWAYS someone better and that you didn’t lose anything, you will find someone that will trully treat you better.
As a person with endo who actually has a supportive loving partner….i cannot stress to you enough the importance of picking a partner who will stand by you “in sickness and in health” ….if this is how he is acting now imagine how much worse it will be if you end up in the hospital and he has to take care of you….your pain is real and a person that actually loves and cares for you won’t gaslight you about it.
Huh? YOU violated his trust? Well that’s funny considering he filmed you secretly and didn’t believe you in the first place. 🙈
Good job packing your bags right away.
Holy mother of all gaslighting. This guy is olympic level
I mean..was be right though? Were you milking it to get out of doing certain things because it kinda sounds like you were??
He was 100% wrong that’s a no brainer but based on his response I’m wondering
Finally a story where we don’t have to tell the person to dump his sorry ass
This is my favorite end to a post, EVERRRR!!
“Guess who’s now single and filing a report.”
This is bizarre and disturbing behavior. I’m glad you left AND are filing a report.
I’ve always been thankful my then boyfriend understood and protected when I tried IUD’s. I have sciatica endometriosis and Mirena is supposed to help with it. My SE attacks the IUD’s causing immense pain spontaneously followed by feeling completely fine 3-5 minutes later like nothing happened.
We were at Hannover fest with his friends and I almost fell to the ground I was cramping so bad. I ditched immediately so he could have a good time with his friends but I found out they were searching for me the whole time while I was laying in the grass about to fall asleep because the pain subsided. It’s embarrassing to say the least, and I hated it for him. When I returned home from traveling abroad I went and had it removed.
He came here and recently left. Got another IUD to try it again and the same pain all over again. Just 3 years apart. My now husband just supported me the best he could knowing I was in actual pain.
I love having a high pain threshold but when I get these flare ups, OOF. I’m out.
He just showed you and told you exactly how he feels about you and how little he respects you. What you do with that information from here on out is up to you. If he minimizes pain like this, think long and hard about what he’s going to be like when you’re in labor and after you have a child.
I think you mistyped your title, shouldn’t it be
“My Ex-Boyfriend…”
As a man, this is some wild shit. Run girl. Run.
Dump him. Stay away from him. Block him every way possible. Never speak to him again. You deserve better.
Disgusting end it now no telling what else he might try
Interesting. So he understands the concept of violation.
Where tf do these men get these ideas?? I really wish they had to experience the level of pain that we feel. Especially those of us with PCOS endometriosis etc. I’m glad you filed a report and left him. So proud of you for that.
Good riddance! He sounds like a pain in the ass.
I’m so glad you left him omg. File that report! I have PCOS as well and my boyfriend remembers my supplements, cycle, favorite comfort snacks and drinks – that’s what you deserve
I’m glad you are out and filing a report.
He needs a paper trail.
Good job!
You made the right move OP. Happy you’re filing a report as well. Good on you ! You’re strong and showed him that you are! And you’re not willing to tolerate what he did. That kind of behavior is inexcusable and should not be tolerated at all.
So he hates women, why would he not believe u? And why would he insist that u were lying to the point he hid a camera?? He’s weird glad u left his ass
you’re well shot of him! as someone with PCOS who has to precisely time my pain meds to avoid me being on the floor writhing and trying not to vomit from the pain, i still have periods of ‘moving around fine’ between bouts of nausea, diarrhea, pain, peeing every 15 minutes, and waterfall bleeding. means nothing and I still don’t leave my house for the worst day(s) because i’m basically useless those days.
I’m petty, so I’d have baught one of those period simulators and sent it to him, told him “put it on max, and try to do stuff”
This man has 0 empathy. And even worse, he refuses to believe you, he thinks he knows better about periods! It’s insane. Run. Don’t walk.
Wow that’s so crazy that he would do that, imagine what else he would do! Congratulations for standing up for yourself that’s definitely not normal behaviour or cute!
There is something wrong with him. He needs help.
Good. Diminishing your pain, especially from something that is well known to cause that level of pain, is awful. Accusing you of faking it and going to such lengths to prove it is even worse. What a sociopath!
violating his trust by overreacting.” what in the fresh hell
Filing a report?
Oh my god. Thank God you left him.
> and said I was “violating his trust by overreacting.”
There’s not much that makes me more annoyed than people weaponizing therapy-speak. Always reminds me of Jonah Hill telling his ex, a professional surfer, that her having pictures of herself in bathing suits on her instagram or surfing around other men or having friends he didn’t like was crossing his “boundaries” and was “hurtful and triggering.”
You were violating his trust?
I’m glad you left him.
More men need to experience the Cramp Simulator! All of them can barely handle level 2 while compared to the women just sitting there at 10!
Definitely good getting away from this nut. 🚩 on fire.
A 100 men vs taking accountability 😭🙏🏼
Notify cops. He is a perv.
I’m sooooo happy with that last sentence
Good for you! What a POS. Smart woman!!
So proud of your get up and go. That’s the only right thing to do. Stay safe and healthy. Stay gone.
You did a right thing. Stay away as far as you can.
Thank god you had the clarity and strength to get out immediately and report his ass.
Y’know, I just read a post about 20 minutes ago from a young woman, about 19, I think, asking if she was overreacting because her boyfriend gave her three ‘light slaps’ and she didn’t like it.
Now here you are, 25, and telling a guy who called you a liar and had no empathy to go fuck himself.
Proud of you!
Okay ex boyfriend.
Move on.
Nothing more to do or say about this loser psycho you’ve been dating way too long. Start rebuilding your self love and life without his succubus energy.
Wow, good job! So proud of you.
Good for you! That’s so invasive and breaks every boundary.
He’s giving you so many signs he’s a horrible boyfriend. The universe or god will keep letting him be trash bc it’s showing you the signs he is not meant for you. You deserve better. Your man should be taking care of you, showing he cares, helping you when he can. Not whatever manipulative bullshit this is. Run girl, unless you want to be miserable forever. Fr
Egads. After trying for over a year of trying to handle erratic periods that were painful, heavy & sometimes non stop, my daughters gyno finally officially got the PCOS diagnosis confirmed. While there may be SME women who use period pain to get out of obligations, in most cases it’s not.
Yeah, good for you for dumping that guy.
🗣️ Nexttttt!!!!
Would’ve left after the “dramatic” comment ngl, if your partners first response to you being in pain is anything less than “are you alright? What’s wrong? How can I help? Do you need me to take you to the doctor?” You need to pack up and go imo
Pcos sucks and the periods are so brutal what a jerk
Having a period can hurt. If you tell him you’re in pain he should believe you. I fear that he has no empathy. He just doesn’t understand what women go through.
You left out one thing- were you actually moving around well while he was gone?
You left out an important detail- were you indeed moving around well while he was gone? Apparently you were healthy enough to move out that night.
What a fool.
OP I’m not trying to freak you out even more but I would bet money those cameras have been there longer than he’s claiming. I’m really glad you got out of there and contacted the authorities
My wife collapsed in pain in a parking lot after me frantically searching for her in the store. It was very embarrassing for me that she made a scene like that. Someone called the cops because they just saw a man scoop up a passed out woman on the ground and drive away. I rushed her to the ER. Turns out she has some kind of ovarian cyst. Never once did I question her pain.
If you are in that bad of pain, just stay home. Don’t try to power through it. Men have no idea how bad the pain is. Especially this man. You’re better off without him.
WTF. Not only is he totally hanging out on some scary online forums, but he also tried to gaslight you. What a misogynist. Good thing you got out.
Omg yes leave him. My ex kept recording devices in the house and had a tracker on my car ….. He was a cheater… The tracker in my car was so that he knew where I was so I didn’t bump into him with a gf. He kept a key logger app on my computer and a recording card in the printer. He was just flat out evil. The ones who do these type things mentally ill. Your female problems are there and he’s trying to discredit you on them. Glad you left!!
So glad you left him & are filing a report. That’s literally insane. I hope the next unfortunate girl he winds up with hooks him up to one of those period simulators so he can see for himself
Good for you!! What a little b***h!
Get out of that relationship. Now.
Updateme
filing a report because he setup a camera in his living room? wont stick unfortunately
Hot damn. I don’t want to be the asshole here, but I almost feel like you should drop a name and city so EVERYONE can avoid this guy.
Overuse of quotes. Sus
this post made me realize how lucky i am cause im treated like a princess in distress when it’s my time of the month