Location: New Jersey – USA
This happened today so excuse any errors or lapses of exact information as I am still a little shaken up about this. For some backstory, I am19 and my brother is 22 as of now so we are both adults but we split time with my dad and stepmom and then my mom and her boyfriend. So today we started our day with a nice DnD game that we have been kind of dreading as our dad was DMing and he puts on a horribly slow and grueling session every time that we have played in the past. Looking past this the game was going pretty good and I was trying to make it enjoyable for everyone involved.
As the day went on and my dad kept drinking and devolving into a sloppy angrier version of himself I knew that it was heading in the typical lashing out at people direction it always goes in. It started off with smaller comments about the way we were playing and remarks about my brother’s girlfriends DMing ability from past sessions. These remarks were aimed at everyone, including my step mother. He is clearly upset about something and we all ask him to elaborate but he refuses to do so and says that were done playing. As it was a day we typically at our moms, my brother and I began to pack up anything we needed to head over there. Then he says that the games not done and he wants to continue, we don’t end up continuing and he starts going off about random things that he has dealt with in the past, his divorce with my mom, his friendships ending, etc. Then our step mom joins in with him and starts to list things that we have done that are “disrespectful” or “not caring.” He mentions things such as our phones and cars and how he could take them away in a heartbeat. I have still not even gotten a word in at this point and I was kind of just sitting watching as they argued with my brother.
There’s many things about this that may not make sense from a third person view and I get that cause I still cant wrap my head around it all. Apologies for any of that and ask questions if you want to, I will go more in depth.
Anyways, the arguing gets worse and I did decide to take a video with my phone just in case. Even before we were adults it felt as if everything he had provided was given out of control and not love. Everything was a bargaining chip he could use in the future if need be. He is telling my brother to get out and my brother gives some verbal push back because he felt as if he couldn’t sit there and take this from him. Like I said I wont go into the nitty gritty but it was a horrible sight and my brother decided to call our mom to come and get him because now we don’t have access to a vehicle of any sort.
At this point its mostly a conflict with my dad and brother and I was watching in borderline horror. I talked to my brother and found out his plan and what he was doing and I decided I would go with him to make sure that he would be okay and we could talk about this and maybe come back and resolve the issue. I then say that I am going with him to get some space and talk to him about it and we can come back to resolve this issue in the near future but I’m met with the same things he said to my brother. As we packed up our items to leave we hear constant noise and verbal assaults coming from the living room, slurs, curses, the whole nine yards.
My brother ended up leaving his phone, keys, anything my dad thought he had the right over. I left with any necessary items and my phone because I felt he did not have the right to take it from me. I got this as a birthday gift, still payed half and have been continuing to give him money monthly for my phone bill as well as car insurance. That goes for both me and my brother. I did not feel safe in that house and to be honest, I never really did, I felt as if I was constantly looking over my shoulder in case I screwed one tiny thing up and all the fire got directed onto me.
I don’t truly know where this is going from no on cause I’m still sort of in the middle of it all. This is more of a rant and less of asking for legal advice and I apologize for that but for any domestic cases I would want to at least know how something like this would be handled in case it gets to a legal standpoint. Thank you for anyone who is willing to read this and I would really appreciate any help or advice.