My brother didn’t invite me to his birthday party because of his gf

Hello everybody,

I (f22) have had a lot of mixed responses about this situation so I wanted to take it to Reddit. To start with some background. The beginning of July my whole family went to a water park. My brother (Nick m20) and his gf (Anna F19) went off on their own and didn’t hangout with the rest of us very much. At the end of the day we meet up and have picked two places to eat for dinner. One that is gluten free and the other was not. Since the family is so big we took two cars. Each one going to a different restaurant. Since I am gluten free and my baby sister hated the place that was gluten free we decided to switch cars and then nobody has to stop at two places. I go and tell this to Nick and Anna and Anna tells me I have to ride in the other car. I get annoyed and just ride in the other car. The next day I learn that Anna thought that I was talking bad about her behind her back (she thought I was talking about her feet). Me and Nick talked this over and we both agreed that it was a misunderstanding. This is the actual conversation “ooh just think about how many nasty feet are in the water” “Eww stop feet are gross” “Guys I really understand why Anna hates feet”. I think because of the distance we were in line that she just heard Anna and Feet.

Anyway I think we have it all figured out. Well me and my sister get lunch together last weekend on Saturday. She get a call from Nick telling her that she needs to hurry up so they can make it to his birthday adventure. My sister tells me it’s her, Nick, Anna, my other brother, and our cousin. I ask my sister why Nick didn’t invite me and she stated it was because I am mean to Anna. I am obviously hurt and was so confused. I have tried inviting Anna and Nick to all kinds of things but they always are busy. Plus up until the water park thing I really thought that me and Anna were friends. We all got along great but now it feels like this one misunderstanding has turned the whole house into a war zone.

We all still live at our parent’s house. My mom has been fighting with my dad because Nick’s whole character has changed since the water park thing. He has been blowing off all his responsibilities (no called no showed work, no chores, ignores simple tasks that he is asked to do). The newest thing that happened is my mom, dad and I are going on a work conference one week in November. My mom asked Nick to stay and watch my baby sister since she just started middle school. Nick agreed. Well yesterday he told us that the same week we have our conference he booked a trip that whole week to go see Anna. This cause a fight and now everyone in the house seems to be on edge. My dad is telling my mom that Nick needs to live his life and my mom is mad because she needed him for one week out of the whole year. Plus Anna will come back from college for thanksgiving break two weeks after he is going to visit her.

I just don’t know what to do to help mend the situation. I want things to be better with Nick but everytime I try talking to him there is no accountability on his side. I am tired of apologizing but I also don’t want to loose my brother. We grow up really close and I know things will change as we are older but I feel like the direction we are going I am going to have no relationship with him.