I told my brother he cannot move into my home and he is angry with me. But there is no way it can happen. My brother is a doctor. Or was a doctor I guess. He lost his job and he is being investigated for fraud. I’m not a doctor so I will try my best to explain what has happened. In my country the healthcare system only allows a medication called Semaglutide for Diabetes. The cost is not covered for anything else. If someone wants Semaglutide for another reason they have to pay for it themselves. There is no way to have the cost covered.
There was a test that doctors like my brother did for Diabetes. I do not know what the test is called. The person had to stop eating and drinking. Then they would go to the doctors office and get tested. Then they had to drink a special liquid. Then they got tested a second time. My brother told his patients to eat before the first and second test. This would give results that showed the person has diabetes. They were able to get the costs for Semaglutide covered by the healthcare system. I don’t know how my brother got found out. I know some of the people ended up in the hospital but I am not sure how what my brother did was found out. He has already been told he cannot be a doctor in our country again because he misused a prescription medication. He has lost his job as a doctor to. He is being investigated for fraud against the healthcare system.
He wants to come live with me. He would not be working and would also expect me to pay for everything as well as living with me for an undetermined length of time. I said no and now he is angry with me. But it would not work out. I live in a studio so there is no room. I make enough money to look after myself but not someone else to. My parents live in a retirement community and are on fixed pensions. Our grandfather lives in assisted living care. So none of them have the money or the room to help my brother. He says I am the only one who can help him. When I said no he got angry with me and called me a bad sister. He says he used all his money for help with his legal problems and I must help. My job is an electrician but I also work as an auto mechanic once in a while for extra money. It is enough for me. My brother said I can do more auto mechanic work when he lives with me. I do not want to do this. I do not think this is my responsibility and I am angry he would ask this from me and blame me for his problems. Thank you for reading.
Adding:[English is my second language so I ask you to forgive any mistakes]
Comments
I’m sure he knows enough people to crash at. But you two know he would never leave your studio again. So yeah, don’t let him in. You don’t have the means to support him.
He shouldn’t have committed fraud! The nerve of this man to demand you take on more work for him, and then to blame you for his self-inflicted situation. No, sir.
Good for you for setting firm boundaries and refusing to compromise your own peace and sanity for his sake.
He needs to find a job and take care of himself. Why doesn’t he have any savings. He won’t be able to keep living like he did, but he should be able to get a job somewhere.
You don’t have to let him live with you, and it sounds better if you don’t. If he keeps pushing, ask him how many jobs he’s applied for (even basic jobs like sweeping the floors of a shop) and how much he has in savings
Not that it matters, but normally people like this get found out because their master plan to accomplish x ethically questionable/illegal goal includes personally diagnosing people with a certain disease or set of diseases at significantly higher rates than are normal, which someone eventually notices wherever that influx of diagnoses lands a bunch of new patients in an unusually short window.
Time for the fraud to get a job.
Suggesting you take on extra hours to support him is outrageous entitlement
Tell your brother that HE can do auto mechanic work since he is no longer a doctor.
He was found out probably because when those people ended up hospitalized and they checked hemoglobin A1C levels they figured out pretty quickly (in addition to regular glucose testing) that those patients never had diabetes in the first place. Patients probably ratted him out too about how your brother helped them cheat the system and he was reported.
Has he helped you in the past when he was a big shot physician? Is he willing to get a job that’s “beneath him” to start building back his life up? My guess is no and it doesn’t matter bc he is not your responsibility- he’s an adult!
He’s the one who fucked up, tell him to go get another skill and a new job, because you cannot afford to pay for more than yourself to live, and you will not be starving over his mistake. My god…
Edit: I also just looked up the drug. LOW doses can be used short term for weight loss, but a regular sized dose that would control diabetes taken by a normal person or taken long term in low doses can cause serious side effects, including kidney failure, increased risk of thyroid tumors (including carcinoma) and several other things that could kill people. He’s lucky all he’s getting charged with is fraud, and not medical malpractice. He should be in jail, not just jobless
Sucks that your brother got fired for trying to get people lower cost weight loss drugs. Expensive stuff without insurance.
Seems like losing his job and his housing was a natural consequence of practicing ethically terrible medicine. It sucks that he’s dealing with that, but maybe he should have… not done what he did. I hope he finds some temporary housing and some kind of employment soon but you don’t have to be the one helping him with either.
The man is a liar and a criminal and seems to think because you are his siblings you should work more hours at a highly physical job to support him from feeling the entire consequences of his terrible choices. Because it sounds like not one mistake but hundreds of choices he made to get where he is now.
No matter if they are family or not I would not want to be under the same roof as a criminal who has literally caused people to be hospitalised. He is a danger to people. And I hope he ends up in jail – then he will get free accommodation and food.
Stand your ground or he might end up being a leech. He shouldn’t have done that. He knew what he was doing.
I’m also shocked someone would spend all those years studying and practicing to be a doctor only to do that…
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It seems like the perfect time for your brother to learn new skills to get a new career.
He needs to get another job because he can’t expect you to pay his way for the rest of his days. Just so you know, for the mere fact that he mentioned you taking on more work to help him simply means he is never planning on leaving your apartment and you will work to the bone to support him. It’s not your duty to take care of a grown man who lost his job because he got greedy. He needs to find his own way.
He sounds unscrupulous and entitled. He got himself into this mess and it’s not your responsibility to look after him. He’s an adult who can go and get another job, even if it’s waiting tables. You are perfectly in your rights to not let him move in with you.
You’re doing the right thing. He can get a job and figure it out. That’s called being an adult.
Why don’t you decide what you would do to help him help himself, and offer that? I’m sure you care about your brother and would like to help, but offering up your own space and income is obviously an unreasonable ask.
Could you offer to help him find work, or a place to live? If he refuses that’s up to him, but it might help him notice he’s being unreasonable!
This situation often ends up with people who never end up leaving because they get comfortable being there.
He’s in his position because of his own actions.
He’s a bum. And, a fraud.
Say no and stop answering his calls. Be careful when you leave your apartment, he might try to come there and potentially be violent if he feels this entitled to your money.
Tell him to work at a quick shop or clean houses to pay rent in HIS own place. You are so NOT a bad sister.
You can work more to support him? WTF? lmao, that is some entitlement. Don’t let him guilt you. Stand your ground and be firm. He is/was a doctor, he will figure it out
He may be able to apply at other Countries that have a Dr shortage. But cheating was on him. He knew the consequences. Do not move him in. He is an adult.
No one told him to commit fraud. He did it all on his own and he has to suffer the consequences. Maybe just block him for a little while so things calm down. I’m sure it doesn’t feel good knowing your sibling is talking to you like that over his decisions. He’ll figure it out on his own just like he figured out how to commit fraud.
He’s a grown man who needs to take responsibility for his actions. Not your problem, he can figure it out. Don’t let him guilt you into taking him in either.
What an entitled POS.
Guy is a psychopath. He’s in the wrong, not you. I would cut him off.
As someone who takes semaglutide for actual diabetes I am having a hard time feeling any empathy for your brother. I think you are doing the right thing in protecting yourself. Stick to it.
He can’t work as a doctor, but I’m sure he’s allowed to work, in general.
He can help himself.
America will take him. No questions asked. Fraud away doc, fraud away.
Right you are. He was cheating diabetic people out of their medcine.
The amount of diabetes medication is limited. By creating false files for people to fraudulously get that medication to lose weight he cheated patients out of the medcine and the health system out of money.
He deserved what he got.
In this country the saying is not my circus; not my monkeys meaning you are not responsible for the drama your brother has created for himself. Too bad he did not save some of the illegally got funds for a time like this. Just because he can no longer be employed as a doctor I am sure he can work doing something else instead of telling you to work more hours to take care of him. Tell him to channel some of that anger into seeking employment and a place to stay because no matter how angry he gets the answer will still be no. He may as well because I am pretty sure he may lose his license, face jail time or house arrest. Even if his license is not revoked it may be suspended for 3-5 years so he better find some way to live and eat on his own steam.
He fucked around and found out just how deep the river of shit is. Future employer’s and prospective employers will want to know why he is looking for work outside the healthcare sector despite holding the diplomas. They’ll ask about a gap in their employment history too should he try covering it up. This will change everything in his life and there’s no undo button to press.
It’s not your fault he lost his job, girlie. It’s his own, and I don’t blame you for not wanting him in your small home that sounds like it’s only big enough for you. If I we’re you, I’d tell your parents and grandparent (I can’t remember who you said) and just have an honest conversation and say you can only house yourself. It’s his own fault for his malpractice case. He needs to learn from his mistakes, and it seems like he needs tough love. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. If he escalates, I would go no contact.
Don’t feel bad for establishing boundaries. You did nothing wrong here
Stand your ground. He’ll bring you nothing but trouble, which you already seem to know. It doesn’t even sound like he’s prepared to get a job anywhere. He’ll just do nothing all day while you work yourself to death.
Get him an application for McDonald’s house
Hey, just have him crash with some of the people he fraudulently provided drugs for. They owe him a favor!
He created this mess by misleading patients. He harmed patients. This is all on him. You’re not required to rescue him or help him in any way.
Can he move to the US? Doctors here seem to hand out that medicine without having to prove diabetes.
He needs to work in a shop. He did illegal things and has to adjust is,life’s expectations. Find a room to rent and earn enough to live there. Do not take him in. It will not go well considering he is angry already.
Your brother wants to live rent free and wants you to work more often to pay for him,? A studio apartment is too small. No way
He thinks you are a bad sister? He would not be in this situation if he was not such a terrible doctor!
He can get a job. He doesn’t need to move in with you and have you financially support him. He sounds entitled.
Tell him NO and to leave you alone.
You’re right. He’s wrong.
He wants you to sponsor him? Work more hours so he can sit at home? No no no. Tell him to go get a job at McDonalds.
OMG. OP he doesn’t have money saved? Or did they shut down any accounts he had. What’s up with where he was living? He could go elsewhere once this is over, him being contrite could help him.
He has more nerve than a bum tooth. He wants YOU to work extra to support him. To Hell with that. Tell him to get a job, any job and support himself or is he too proud to do “honest” labor.
He can contact some of those patients he told to eat before the tests
Why is he expecting you to work more to support HIM?!? That’s insane. He can get multiple jobs to help himself.
He would rather take advantage of you. He’s being ridiculous.
Well, he needs to get a job. I understand that in his head all he can be is a doctor, but there are many other jobs out there. Maybe he doesn’t want to go be a cashier in a supermarket, but he needs to have some money coming in while the legal problems are happening. Or he can work as a receptionist in a doctor’s office. Or anything really. He can work two jobs if he has to to make ends meet. With that money he’ll have enough to at least rent a room somewhere. Because it sounds like he was making a large amount of money before all this happened and he didn’t give you a penny since you’re living in a studio and working two jobs to make ends meet. He didn’t help you when he had more than he needed, why should you be obligated to help him when you’re barely making it?
Don’t even let him inside your apartment for lunch! Once he’s inside, he will never leave. In some countries, once a person is inside a home, he is allowed to stay, and it takes a long time and a lot of money to legally make him move out. So if you want to see him, arrange to meet at a restaurant or some public place.
I have seen this happen with more than one adult male. They wound up living at the other person’s expense for between 5 and 15 years.
He already proved he’s willing to break the law, and he’ll do it against you, too.
Sorry this has happened to you.
If he can’t work anymore as a doctor, he should be looking for a job.
Get ready to call the cops a lot.
I’m on Mounjaro, and it is expensive if you’re not diabetic. You should know the cost before you see a Doctor about it. I wouldn’t get giving him a cent.
He made his bed, he now has to lay in it.
He can take any job offered & live where his means allow. Tell him to stop being so damn entitled & grow up
How lucky you are that your brother suggested you work extra hours to support him! What a thoughtful person.
No is a complete sentence. Let him be mad.
Do not let him move in. He can get a job somewhere else. He will never leave if you let him stay.
He cant work any other job? He doesn’t expect to bring anything to the table to support?
This is not your responsibility. He lost his livelihood because he did the wrong thing. Let him figure out things on his own.
It seems your brother was trying to work around the system to get his patients’ the medicine. My immediate family member is a doctor. Mental health is a serious issue for them. If you don’t have the room, perhaps you can offer to use your contacts to help him find somewhere to stay.
Sounds like he may not have to worry about housing for much longer, the prison system will give him 3 hots, and a cot.
As a healthcare professional myself, he did this to himself. He purposely skipped appropriate tests. He would have known the risks not only to himself but to other people. He has no right to be angry at you for not supporting him when this is all his doing from an active decision he made.
I’m so curious about what country you’re from, electricians make a killing in my country. But to your actual topic, you’re doing the right thing. Your brother messed up, he has no one to blame but himself. And those drugs aren’t even that safe, they reduce bone mass and are lawsuits waiting to happen on the other side of this. Your brother now has to figure out his new move and if he stays with you he will likely not bother until you throw him out.
It isn’t your responsibility to help him with his MAJOR fuck up. He. Hurt. People. He knew what he was doing was wrong and did it anyways, so now he’s on his own.
Your brother is being an entitled AH. If you want to feel like you’re doing something and not completely abandoning him (which, by the way, you’re not), offer to teach him one of your trades and help him get jobs/gigs doing those until he’s able to support himself. But this is something he has to figure out on his own…
Definitely don’t let him move in, he’d probably never move out.
Sounds like he got his patients to falsify a fasting blood glucose test. This is the most common test to diagnose Type 2 diabetes.
A normal person will have a fasting glucose level of less than 100. But it can be up to 140 after a meal. Sometimes a little higher, but not usually much higher.
A person with diabetes will have a fasting blood glucose of 126 or higher.
So yeah, a non diabetic person will look diabetic on a fasting blood glucose test if they recently ate.
Your brother did this to himself. Not to mention that GLP-1 drugs are showing tons of side effects, he acted unethically. You’re no under no obligation to help.
Are his arms and legs broken too? He may not be a doctor but he can certainly get a job doing something else, even if it is “below” him. Don’t take the scamming freeloader in and you have beautiful English.
Your brother is behaving like a moron. He is now unemployed, unlicensed, and unhoused. How in the world does he think your studio is going to have enough space for 2 adults? He is not now nor will he ever be your responsibility. If he has the audacity to show up at your door you have zero obligation to open it.
You are doing this right OP. Stay firm on your “no” and force him to figure out his own mess rather than relying on someone else to sweep up his garbage. Your home, your rules, your boundaries. Best of luck OP!
First, just because he can’t work as a doctor any longer doesn’t mean he can’t work some other job. Restaurants, retail, hotel/hospitality, etc. He can downsize from wherever he currently lives and get his own studio apartment.
Just because he’s your brother, it doesn’t entitle him to free room and board because he can’t work in his chosen profession any longer.
He knew the rules and intentionally broke them. Who can believe anything he says, now? None of it is your problem.
Best case, he gets some time for his illegal doings and doesn’t need a room.
Your brother is trying to boss you around like one of his nurses. ‘work more’
Tell him to get back in the food line and worry about his reputation moving forward.
Any ‘high society’ job is gonna see that legal strike. So he better get used to a wrench or other trade that lets felons work.
How he got caught is Simple. and dumb. Once one of those patients ended up in the hospital, he was done. because the first question they ask among many was ‘what are you taking’ and they ran tests. once those tests came back, smart doctors went ‘Huh’…and your dumb brother got pinched. He could have killed someone. Robert Courtney-ed himself real good.
Tell him find a job he can do other things for work
Good for you for having strong boundaries!
He can get a job at McDonalds and support himself. Just because he can not work as a doctor doesn’t mean he can not work at all.
I’ve known several people over my lifetime who lost professional licenses due to their stupidity, bad judgment, drugs or criminal activity. Three had law licenses, one was an accountant and one was a doctor like your brother.
Without exception, the initial reaction was a loss of identity and some pretty weird behavior to compensate. Then they all (within the first year) pivoted to another career. My doctor acquaintance went to drug sales (legally—he started as a drug rep and now has a management position.) I think one of the lawyers went back to school and became a teacher.
Many people who have any type of professional license that took effort and education to obtain have much of their self-esteem tied up in the fact that they are a doctor or a beautician or a lawyer.
When they lose their ability to be a professional because of their own dumb actions, they don’t know who they are.
Just a long-winded way to say that you are absolutely in the right to say no to your brother. “No” to his moving in; “no” to his inappropriate demand that you take on extra work to support him; and just a general “No” to the hassle he’s putting you through.
Your brother is absolutely in the wrong to make such ridiculous demands of you.
There might be hope, however, that once he gets through this transition and gets another career going, he might stop being such an ass. I have seen that happen.
He would be taking over your life if he moves in with you. He’s trying already, telling you to work more to support him.
My first thought passed with “The brother fucks up and it’s the sister’s responsibility to clean it up? Pakistan for SURE.”
Then I thought oh maybe India. Maybe China. Maybe-
I realized that narrows it down not at all.
That being said he is NOT your responsibility. He got greedy and started selling off label as a shop doc for weight loss. It was money and just money.
Why didn’t he help you when he was a well paid doctor, huh? You’re a working professional in a studio. He could have helped. Didn’t.
Also: your English is phenomenal!!!’
Do not let him live with you and make certain there are no other copies of keys or passwords to any accounts he can steal. He is being an abusive parasite do not let him near you
He can get other kinds of jobs to support himself. Nothing is stopping him. That isn’t your job to cover his expenses, that is his job, he can wash floors
What your brother did WAS fraud. He was defrauding insurance companies intentionally. He wanted to make a quick buck and got caught. He made his bed and now he gets to lie in it. It is not your job to rescue him. He probably made a lot of money in his fraud. It’s his choice to spend it on lawyers or rent. He can go get some other job now
Why would you let anyone move in with you into your studio apartment for an undetermined length of time without paying for anything? Brother or no brother that should be a hard NO!
I might give my brother 30-60 days to help him out but that’s a slippery slope
Why can’t he find a job to bring in money? Don’t let him move in.
Just because he is trained as a doctor doesn’t mean he cannot get a job doing something else. Do not let him live with you. He has created his own problems. He has also proved he is untrustworthy. Besides, won’t he have a jail sentence coming since he broke the law? Problem solved. He will have a place to stay and be fed.
No, don’t let him guilt you in to moving in! He made his choice, he knew what he was doing was wrong. Greed got the best of him so now he wants to become your burden! My brother is very much like yours, I spent so much money on him, his wife and kids. Every time a scam caught up with him I would save him. Your peace means everything, say no and if that means he stops communicating with you then so be it
I’d think after being a doctor he could easily get a job in home health care, hospice care, assisted living, etc. A lot of places hire those with experience and medical training.
No you are not the only one who can help him. Just like everyone else, you CANNOT help him. You live in a studio apartment. No.
No you are not the only one who can help him. Just like everyone else, you CANNOT help him. You live in a studio apartment. No.
No you are not the only one who can help him. Just like everyone else, you CANNOT help him. You live in a studio apartment. No.
The fact his response to you not making enough to support him was for you to work more is telling.
fafo. Im a diabetic that didnt have access to ozempic for over a YEAR cause of doctors like him cause alot of people in australia got around the system doing similar. He deserves to lose his licence, i fear he got basically nothing in return and firebombed his own life. Like i said Fafo, 🙂 i hope he gets his feet back under him but im not really seeing him willing to flip burgers to support himself
This medication almost killed me. I ended up very unwell with acute pancreatitis, losing my gallbladder, higher risk of pancreatic cancer and extremely bad side effects that will never go away, when I used it for weightloss for a few months. It’s a good thing your brother got caught for misusing it.
He screwed up, actions have consequences. He got himself into this mess after his poor choices, it is absolutely not your responsibility to take care of him. What a manipulative loser.
I’m no expert, but it sounds like he is the one that messed up, not you.
Not your problem, OP.
He defrauded the health system, he is a criminal, you do not want anyone like that associated with you, let alone living with you.
He knew the risks when he did this so now he can suffer the consequences. His fuckup is not your problem to fix
Tldr – doc was caught for ozempic fraud to help people who wanted it purely for vanity reasons, yet didn’t want to pay.
If you’re not diabetic or obese, please don’t play around with drugs that control glucose levels. In my country, a bodybuilder fell into a coma as he apparently abused diabetes medication just to look “better”.
Don’t let him move in. He’ll never get a job and will expect you to provide food, shelter & even money for him. It’s his own fault for losing his job. I’m wondering if he was getting money under the table from his patients he helped get the medication. A lot of people who aren’t diabetic try to get their Drs to prescribe it for the weight loss benefits from the appetite suppressant in the medication.
The test he cheated on is a glucose test that registers the A1C. I don’t remember the exact medical terminology, but it’s a measure for testing how well the body produces insulin after eating carbs & sugars. Before Drs started using those sucky sweet drinks to patients they used to have patients come in fasting, draw blood, then would send them out to go eat a high carb meal and return for the second draw.
If you can, cut contact with him completely
it’s called a Glucose Tolerance Test. and wow.
That’s probably a test called OGTT.
There are lots of jobs he can take related to the medical field that doesn’t need an MD.. medical scribe, medical VA, medical writer/content creator. As well as tons of other jobs not related to medicine.
I understand he cannot work as a doctor. But he could work elsewhere, say a grocery store.
Him telling you to pick up an extra shift is crazy. Don’t let him in unless you want to be leeched on.
The test is a GTT. Glucose tolerance test. Fasting for 8 to 10 hours and then given a glucose drink then tested every hour for 2 hours.
I see the empathetic side of your brother trying to help others. Especially with the cost of things etc….
But…don’t allow him to move in!! He’s already said you can work more to cover things. So he can sit there and do nothing!! I. Don’t. Think. So.
You brother basically behaved as a drug dealer, complete with the entitlement of expecting you to house him for free now.
You’re right to set boundaries here. A studio apartment and your own limited income isn’t a foundation for taking in someone long-term, especially when there are legal and financial issues involved. Your brother needs professional help, not to shift the responsibility onto you.
keep optimistic
Its called a glucose tolerance test.
You fast for 24 hours for a fixed, non adjusted result, then drink a glucose syrup. Usually 2 hours later, more blood is drawn and the results sho how your body processes glucose.
The issue is that your brother telling people not to fast would immediately adjust the results. It would show a higher than expected glucose reading, then even higher after the syrup. That indicates diabetes. If you then take medication to treat diabetes, it can have irreversible, and potentially life threatening consequences.
If youre saying he’s only being done for fraud, then he’s damn lucky. Every single patient could sue him. Every single patient would win. He’s lucky he doesn’t have a lovely assault charge on top of fraud, or even manslaughter… or worse.
He was likely discovered because if someone has diabetes, its recorded, and the doctor who diagnosed it is recorded too. They likely saw a pattern in the records of patients in hypo or hyperglycemia, or DKA patients, who were only in those states because of taking medication they didn’t need.
A doctor prescribing medication to patients who dont need it is 100% worse than a doctor who misses an occasional diagnosis. Literally how people die needlessly.
The fact is, he misinformed his patients, he put their lives at risk, and he cost the health care system potentially tens of thousands of whatever currency.
So he should count himself lucky. Medical fraud, or medical negligence? The fraud he has a chance to scrape back from in time. The negligence? No patient, no office, no hospital in their right mind would ever consider a doctor with a negligence claim on file. At least with fraud he’ll just be monitored and extra checks done if he’s ever employed again.
The absolute best you can do is give him little bit of money, if you have, to rent a cheap place, then cut contact. He can do some minimum wage jobs to sustain himself wtf he’s expecting you to do more side jobs. Don’t let him stay in your house even a day with his attitude he’ll never leave.
I take semaglutide for weight loss, and yes, I have to pay full price. I kinda sort of wish my doc was unethical and tick the box for diabetes, would be soooo much cheaper for me