My entire world just blew up . I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. can’t stop shaking stressing and freaking out. What can I possibly do to help?

I am 24 My fiancée and I have been together for over 10 years since we were in high school together, so we’ve done absolutely everything with each other holidays vacations birthdays she’s my everything . While she was in high school and even after graduating, she only had one friend, and when they were together, stupid stuff would go on – lying, getting trashed, not remembering who you were with or what happened. She talked with other guys while we were in a relationship and sent photos (because she thought it would be fun), all stupid kid stuff that I forgave because I wanted the relationship to work because I cared about us.

Fast forward to 2021, and with this same friend, I caught her on Reddit selling photos of herself for money even tho she made hella good money already at her job. . She blamed her friend and said it was her idea . She had a choice to stop talking with the friend, who is a horrible influence who to this day still is on only fans. , and to make other friends, as she’s very antisocial and doesn’t want to meet other people, or stay and try to work through this and have a future. She chose to stay with me. .

So, in 2023, we bought a house together, got two dogs, and started our family (no kids). Well, come to find out now, after years of supposed no contact, I find out they’re talking again, and she wants to go back with her friend we had a huge argument . She got very angry, packed all her stuff into a car, and moved in with this friend for a week. During that time, I was at my home trying to figure out what’s going on, what to do, and if we had to sell the house. I was talking with a lawyer about the house assets, etc. While she was making Tinder and a few other apps, she said she downloaded/made them to talk with other guys because she thought we were done.

I’m really hurt that after 10 years, she can just talk with other guys after four days. She never met up with any of them and said she didn’t send any inappropriate photos, but I don’t know if that’s true. She came back a week later to talk and agreed to go to therapy as she has some anger issues, punching holes in walls once in a blue moon, and is depressed due to childhood issues and having no friends/family. And she promised to work on the name-calling (I was constantly called names that no one should say to someone they love). But she says even if she goes to a therapist, it’s a waste of money, they can’t help, and it will make it worse.

I can’t trust her and her friend while they’re together, as I don’t know what’s going to happen with them, and her friend has never changed and still does the same stuff as in high school… Some people never change. I even considered going to couples therapy to try and build trust so there’s no doubt/issues. She says she’ll go, but that it’s a complete waste.

now I constantly have doubt in the back of my mind, thinking something’s going to happen again like it has in the past.

She said I never gave her attention when that’s all I ever did. I honestly think she likes the gratification from other guys calling her beautiful, etc., as what I gave her was not enough. I don’t know. Part of me wants to try and move on and meet other people and have new experiences, as I’ve literally never even been or done anything with anyone else. And part of me wants to stay here as I love what we built and don’t want to start new and sell my house, but all I have now is doubt that stuff is going to go back to old ways. I don’t even have any friends anymore as everyone I used to talk to once I moved stopped messaging me.Or my fiancé accused me of doing stuff I never would with them so I just stoped talking with them so I wouldn’t be accused of doing stuff

Now the real shit show last night she decided to hammer down half a bottle of bird dog whisky as she enjoys getting plastered (I very very very rarely drink and I did not last night what so ever. So she starts hitting me with headphones as we were arguing about this friend I go to walk threw the door to leave she gets shoved looses her balance falls and gets a mark on her face I call the cops as we’re screaming louder etc. and I end up getting arrested and now have a court date like I’m some skum bag as she sed I hit her which never happened so now I had to pack my dog up and go to my parents house and I’m freaking out wtf to do and how all this shit happened. Never ever thought anything like this would happen. I had to go back to my parents house. I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. I can’t stop shaking. I have no clue what to do. I feel like absolute trash and nothing I do helps. I get two hours of sleep wake up crying go back to sleep for 40 minutes and then wake up again. And repeat I’m freaking out now even tho I have a clean record never got in trouble they may try and throw me in jail for absolutely nothing my entire world just burned to the ground I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I can’t stop shaking. I moved into my parents house four days ago and