I’ve been working here for a year and over the time, I have been catching feelings for my friend who is also my coworker M20. He’s a cute guy and it’s obvious because my older coworkers seem to love ogling him.
They know I have something going on with him which is why they keep making these “jokes”. I’m gonna cut to the chase and just give examples. Sometimes they day thing like ‘I wish i could just get an hour alone with him’ or talking about how they would ‘put him to good use’ if they weren’t married.
I get mad and they do it everyday. Sometimes they even try to hit on him and they ask him very personal things about his sex life and I got in an argument with one of them because one of them asked if she could see his dick.
My mom is the boss (she owns a small business) and I’ve told her. She told me to stop being jealous and that they were just admiring him and that I should take it as a compliment towards him. How tf do I get these grown women to stop talking sbout him like he’s just a piece of meat to them?
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You could remind your mother that this situation is a sexual harassment lawsuit just waiting to happen. However, if this guy hasn’t complained to her himself about it you may have to accept that he kind of likes it.
Honestly with your mom owning the business, I don’t know how much people will listen to you. But the website askamanager.org just had a recent post in the last couple days about someone who wrote in about older women objectifying a young college student. I think you’ll find better work related advice there. But keep in mind that family owned businesses are a special beast and do not always operate with typical business rules.
https://www.askamanager.org/2025/08/my-employee-got-fired-and-i-feel-responsible-risque-photos-of-a-new-coworker-and-more.html
This feels like something he should decide. Not you.
Flip the genders in the story and everyone would immediately call it out as inappropriate.
You might need to talk to him about it. Find out his feelings about the situation. And support him. But as someone else said, this is definitely in the realm of sexual harassment and even if he doesn’t sue, someone else can.
Imagine a 40 year old man asking a 20 year old girl to see her genitals. Or saying things like “i wish i could get an hour alone with her” or to “put her to good use”. 🤢
Don’t listen to anyone saying that he probably likes it or has no reason not to like it. They’re sexually harassing him. Your mom needs to do something about it.