TLDR: my husband texted his ex/ called her while we were dating and beginning of our marriage. I would like to move from this but I don’t know how to move forward. How can I move forward?
My husband (m30) and I (f27) have been married for over a year now. When we first got married my husbands ex reached out to him and I was upset.. because previously while dating I spoke to her to stop emailing or no caller id my husband… context while we were dating ( my husband and l) his ex gf and him (my husband) were still friends and I didn’t know.
When I found out I was hurt he didn’t tell me she was still reaching out or he was. While I like to trust him and believe him that it was only friendship nothing more. it hurt me that he lied to me for since we been dating. We were already planning our wedding and I was pregnant…and I spoke to both of them and they said it was never anything more friendship leve conversations. After our wedding.. she emailed him saying she loved him and I told him to tell her to stop reaching out, she needs to respect it. My husband and I got into a fight and he texted his ex girlfriend… that I’m married and I have a wife, I understand how you feel bleh bleh. while I was sleeping. His ex gf ended up calling him and he picked up, I don’t know why he picked up but it hurt me so much. They spoke on the phone for about half an hour, and what hurts me here the most is I feel like our relationship has been fake this entire time, and he just didn’t respect me/ nor did she. I don’t expect anything from her but from him I did. I tried to let it go because I trusted him, thinking I believe him that he wouldn’t text her anything that would hurt me. But I can’t let it go no matter what. I was so hurt and stressed from him being on the phone with her while I was sleeping in, I didn’t get out of bed, spent everyday crying wondering what I did to deserve this. I was miserable in my marriage, I wasn’t happy. I spent the last year working our relationship, I’m happy now but sometimes | wish I never married him. Whenever I remember what happened, I don’t want to be with him. I love him very
much, and I want this to work out. I just don’t know how I can get past this. Do you get past this? How does one get past this?
Comments
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We’d like to take this time to remind users that:
We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors
We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.
Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)
ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.
No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users “friend-zoned”, referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me’s, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.
All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don’t get a free pass.
Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned.
What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, “body counts” or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.
If you have any questions, please message the mods
This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.