I want to start off and say that I truly value this friendship and I never make it obvious when I’m irritated unless it’s warranted.
Basically I have known L since last year and we got very close very fast. I usually am very cautious of who I chose to become friends with- I have a close circle of people and don’t feel the need to make new friends that often. L can be very argumentative at times-she is very logical and I focus more on emotions and this makes us often clash. I don’t think it is normal to argue with friends and she thinks it is. We argue about small things that get resolved rather quickly, but had a big fight about morals about a couple months ago.
T admits to being a very apathetic person towards current events (specifically about a conflict with a specific word that I won’t say since I might get deleted) and I am the complete opposite. She made some disturbing comments about the struggle of these people and others in the developing world that I cannot get over (she doubled down on them after calling her out for being insensitive). This argument did get ‘resolved’ by both of us doubling down on our beliefs and agreeing to not bring up topics like this but I still think about it everyday.
Basically since then everything she’s done seems to put me off. Like everything. If she calls me more than once a day I won’t pick up, or I’ll try to make plans that only require a few hours of hanging out. Maybe I’m just trying to create some distance but this makes her want to push more. She also has a hard time understanding boundaries and if I don’t want to make plans once a week she does get upset
My dilemma is that she is a great friend and even though that fight was two months ago I cannot get over that she thinks like this.
I have tried bringing this up with her (how I still think about the comments she made) and it goes nowhere. As I’m writing this I’m realizing this is a morals issue than a ‘me being annoyed at her’ issue but I feel stuck.
Help!!!!
TL;DR
My friend and I got into an argument about current events/morals and has extremely affected how I view her. However she is a great friend to me and I don’t know how to navigate this!!