My girlfriend still hasn’t told her parents about me after 8 months

r/

We’ve been together for over 8 months and things are honestly really good between us. We communicate well, we support each other and we spend a lot of time together, but one thing has been quietly bothering me which is that she still hasn’t told her parents about me and its been 8 months. Meanwhile I told my family about her pretty early on within the first month or so. My siblings know her name, my parents ask how she’s doing, but when I ask about her family, she just says “they’re complicated” or that she’ll tell them “eventually” I don’t want to push too hard, but I’m starting to wonder like is she embarrassed of me or something? Or just not that serious? I know not everyone has a close relationship with their parents, but I can’t help feeling weird about being kept a secret for this long especially when it comes to actual relationships

Comments

  1. _BlushBee Avatar

    It doesn’t automatically mean she’s embarrassed, but it’s fair to want clarity on where you stand. A gentle, honest convo might help you figure out if it’s really about her “complicated” family or something deeper. You deserve to feel seen, not hidden.

  2. ezagreb Avatar

    Maybe she’s not allowed to date or her parents are old fashioned or religious. Ask again

  3. hammong Avatar

    See rule #2 and #8. Not exactly sure what “advice” you’re asking for here.

    My guess is that she doesn’t want her parents snooping into her personal life, and she accomplishes that by not telling them anything that would instigate scrutiny.

    Either that, or you’re not a serious thing for her. Simply tell her that not meeting her family is becoming a problem for you.

  4. GenoFlower Avatar

    Well, maybe she’s embarrassed of them, not you. Maybe there is addiction, or she’s really poor, or there’s big dysfunction, or something along those lines, and she’d rather not have to explain that to you.

    Have you made it clear that you’re a safe space and you won’t judge?

  5. HappySummerBreeze Avatar

    I would caution you against making conclusions based on what you would do. Your family is not the same as her family and she is not you.

    I’m pretty sure I didn’t mention my boyfriend to my parents until he proposed. I might have, but I think not. I just didn’t want their input or interference in an important relationship.

  6. Dulcimore51 Avatar

    Ask her. Some family situations are toxic.

  7. DryBag6544 Avatar

    You don’t say your age in here. If you are both adults then you will never be more than what you are now. If you are adolescence then it could be almost anything

  8. DKR17 Avatar

    2 possible situations. She either…

    1. Kows her parents too well and is scared l get into a harsh period by either abuse whether physically or verbally. Her family may not as accepting due to religious or cultural reasons. Don’t judge s book by its cover and ask her about it. She may eventually tell about it if she feels comfortable enough.

    2. She is not the person you may know and holds you as a back up, but I doubt this is the case.

    Talk with her. We wouldn’t know it either before she tells it to you.

    Edit: typo.

  9. JasonSDMN2001 Avatar

    Mine hasn’t for 5.5 years

  10. ConfidentLeave8159 Avatar

    Muslims dont believe in dating before marriage

    She could easily be a bad muslim and her parents wont accept you Habibi

  11. Acrobatic-Mess4407 Avatar

    It’s normal to feel weird about this. If her family is complicated, that might explain it, but after 8 months, it’s fair to want to be acknowledged. Try talking openly with her to understand how she feels and where the relationship is headed.

  12. Crimson_Bloom41 Avatar

    totally get why that’d bug you. 8 months is a long time to keep things under wraps, especially if you’ve already told your fam. maybe her family stuff is complicated for real, but it’s fair to want to feel acknowledged in the relationship. try having a low-key convo about how it makes you feel without pressuring her communication is key.

  13. old_Spivey Avatar

    Has she informed her boyfriend yet?