My Husband Hired a Topless Maid as a Stress Reliever… and Honestly? 10/10 Would Recommend

I’ve been drowning in work stress lately, and my anxiety goes through the roof when our apartment’s a mess. I hate cleaning—like, soul-level hate it. But I also can’t relax unless everything is tidy. A cruel cycle.

So, my husband decides he’s gonna do something “special” to lift my spirits. He tells me not to worry about the apartment this weekend. I’m thinking he’s hired a standard cleaning service or maybe bribed a cousin. Nope. This man hired a Topless Maid as a surprise. For me. Because, plot twist: I’m bi. And he knows I find women attractive. And I really hate vacuuming.

It was funny, unexpected, actually super helpful, and somehow very thoughtful?? She was confident, professional, and the place was sparkling by the end. My husband looked so proud, like he just pulled off the surprise party of the year.

Bonus? The maid service is run by one of my old friends—someone I used to do SW stuff with during quarantine. So not only was this a creative gift, but it was also him supporting a friend of ours and her successful business.

I know this probably isn’t your typical “marriage goals” kind of story, but hey—every couple has their own flavor of weird. Ours just happens to include a dust-free living room and great boobs.

Marriage: sometimes it’s messy, sometimes it’s sparkly clean… and sometimes it’s both.