My husband has been with me since 10 years. Through this time, I tried to have a positive relationship with his family including his sisters. Their response has always been of do-more.
His youngest sister went through many emotional up and downs, couldn’t keep a job, anger issues, and I tried to counsel her. She had a habit of over sharing resulting in lots and lots of gossip. She also badmouthed my husband.
She blocked me when I told her to not share her problems so much and discuss them with her family who care the most for her. Anyways we stopped talking for a while.
Then I and my husband got married abroad and she never congratulated me. She got married recently and I helped in making arrangements financially, still no thanks. Infact after her wedding when I and husband video-called her, she ignored me for full 15 minutes, refusing to acknowledge that I was there.
So she had her official marriage months before the wedding ceremony late last year. After which she went to live with her husband. She was working as a receptionist at a doctor’s clinic during this time, and I have learnt that she was having an affair with her boss, who was much older. She took money for him. Didn’t tell him that she was getting married. Told him her sister was.
Needless to say I hate her, and I want to tell on her. She is also pregnant now while I have been struggling with getting pregnant.
Adding: I got confirmation of her affair because I read and heard messages from my SIL detailing on the affair and asking the message recipient to keep her upcoming wedding a secret. I also checked the clinic where she said she worked. There is no clinic. It is a house so she has been going there daily without any occupational reasons.
The reason I went into history about my relationship with SIL is because I don’t want to act out of my personal grievances.
Comments
I mean I think cheaters should always be exposed but don’t do it because your jealous do it for the husband.
Honestly, with everything she’s done to you and her husband, she doesn’t deserve your silence. It’s not about revenge – it’s about truth. If the roles were reversed, she wouldn’t think twice about exposing you. NTA!
You should absolutely do-more and tell them. That would do A LOT
Do it
If she’s done it once she’ll do it again. You should reveal it for the husband’s sake. The sooner he can get out, the better off he’ll be.
You’re holding a lot of justified frustration. She’s crossed boundaries repeatedly, disrespected you and your husband, and clearly has her own issues. But telling on her now, especially while you’re feeling raw from your own fertility struggle, could backfire and make you look petty—even if your anger is valid. Step back, breathe, and focus on your peace. Let her chaos be hers.
INFO: How did you learn she was sleeping with her boss? Are you sure that this is true? Or could it be gossip?
So she sounds like she legit might have some serious mental illness. But also don’t let that other dude suffer
It’s normally none of your business and you shouldn’t get involved, but a pregnancy calls for an audible. Not sure of the best way to out her with minimal blowback on you, but BIL really needs to know about the affair before his name goes into the birth certificate and he potentially ends up on the hook for another man’s baby.
She has been ignoring you for a moment. I’m not sure why you’re expecting her to congratulate/thank you when she made it clear she didn’t want to interact you.
You can expose her and deal with how it will impact your relationship with the rest of the family or mind your business… which is what I would do because I like my peace. You didn’t care when the affair was going on.
Does she even know who the father is 😖
Have you discussed this with your husband? Be careful you don’t overstep here and cause an issue with your husband before you say anything, its his sister, not yours.
Talk to your husband about it. It’s his sister so he should handle it.
The family doesn’t sound like they like you. Might want to tell your husband so he can address it with his family. If it comes from you, it may not be received well.
MYOB. You will only ensure that your whole family is destroyed. If she is actually cheating it will eventually come out without your help.
YTA It’s none of your business.
Damn I feel sorry for that guy cause from the way ur comments look it seems like you wouldn’t even consider telling if you and her didn’t have problems which means more than likely you won’t and that guy is going to be in for it.
How do you know she is having an affair? Did you personally witness it? If so, you need to discuss the issue with your husband before anything else.
I think the husband needs to know, considering the pregnancy. Maybe reach out to the sister and tell her that if she doesn’t tell him, you will. Try to let her do one last thing right before the inevitable degradation of the relationship.
It’s ok to mind your own business in a situation like this.
I don’t think you are going to fare well if you move forward.