Hi guys so (English is not my native language so pls forget my orthography).
I’m 19 and I have a sister as the title says who is insecure abt herself while she is just a child ,I’m really lost and I need your advice so my sister is only 6 yrs old and she keeps telling me that she is ugly and her hair is bad bcs it is straight and she complains abt her teeth shape but she is really perfect and she is so young for such thoughts I don’t know what to tell her .Today she came to me and said I want my face to be white the problem is she is really white I told her that and she saud that she has dark circles so she has them actually but they are so light you can’t even notice them and she started crying and I cried with her but I did not let her see me and told her that she is pretty she shouldn’t be insecure and she must love herself bcs God didn’t create ugly humans or things she stopped crying and tell me okay but I feel that she hates the way she looks . In addition, last time she came to me and said that some friends of hers said that her teeth looks like a vampire and made fun of her bcs she has sharp fangs and she was really insecure pls guys help me help her bcs I really feel sad abt her and She is a child to think like that I don’t want her to grow lacking confidence and self-love so pls pls any advice will be considered and thank you all.
My little sister tells me that she is ugly
r/Advice
Comments
Children are so sensitive, but you can shift her attention to something that she is good at and she can get better at. Overtime with positive validations and encouragement, this will improve her confidence.
You might be able to cheer her up about her teeth by letting her know she will have all new ones very soon. You can validate her by letting her know many people have similar feelings, including adults. Maybe get her to identify her own favorite features and encourage her to focus on them when she is feeling low. You are kind and good to care and help her.
Oh yeah her friends are definitely the problem. You should ask her to not hang around such people. As of the insecure part, we all humans are unique in our own ways, she has hers. You shouldn’t be worrying about it and neither should she. After all she’s just 6 and might not understand what we say yet. You can always reassure her and make active steps to stop those so called little assholes to keep their lame asses to themselves. Either complain the school department or just make it clear to the teachers.
You should praise her good features, like say something like your nose is really pretty your eyes are so beautiful. Also tell her that even if 99 people find you ugly, there will ALWAYS be ATLEAST 1 person who finds her to be the mostt beautiful girl in the world, and that is the person she should be giving attention to, not those other 99 ppl. Tell her that those 99 people are fools who are not worth wasting any time on. Also you can take her to a good trusted child therapist that’ll really help a lot.
Don’t worry I’m sure she will grow up to be a confident bold woman who can stand up for herself anytime anywhere!
Tell her what makes her special! Maybe focus on her kindness or how she makes you laugh. Read books together that celebrate differences
Kids can be mean. Maybe read her stories with strong female leads, and praise her intelligence & kindness, not just looks. Reinforce her good qualities
I think you shouldn’t see her as an adult at least she is sooo young and she is a child. you can trick her very easily. you can create games that grabs her attention for example. or you can talk about her favorite class in the school and you can do her homework with her. she thinks that beauty is the only way to define herself. but it’s not. then you can teach her how to communicate and how to keep her distant from her toxic friends.