I’ve (25)known her(26) for 4 months now, and she’s been coming to my place for the past 2 months (I still live with my parents). Things are going really well between us — we share the same values on almost every level, I really enjoy being with her, and I feel loved by her.
The only thing I’m noticing is that when she’s at my house, she can be very quiet and doesn’t really say much to my parents, even though they often try to start conversations with her. These conversations stay very superficial.
Early on, I asked her about it because I personally don’t have any difficulty interacting with her family. She told me that everything still feels quite new to her and that she needs some time to open up. I said that’s totally okay and that I didn’t want to push her — that it would just take time.
Now, two months later, I notice she sometimes tries, but it doesn’t really lead anywhere. Yesterday, for example, she came over and I asked how her day was. She simply said, “I worked” — and that was it. She didn’t add anything, and it led to an awkward silence. My dad tried to pick up the conversation, but again, she didn’t say much.
She also hasn’t asked what my parents do or did for work, how they are doing — the basic questions you’d normally expect. I’m starting to feel a bit frustrated about it. Each time she comes over, I catch myself thinking: “Please, just be a bit spontaneous, ask some questions, get involved in the conversation.”
I also notice that I can’t really have long conversations with her unless I’m the one driving the interaction and constantly asking questions. I’ve never experienced this in past relationships, where the women were much more spontaneous.
How can I best express this to her without pressuring her or making her feel bad? This is something that really matters to me. How should I bring this up? Is this something someone can grow into? Or am I overthinking it?
TL:DR,
Almost girlfriend is really quiet and not engaging conversations with my parents.