My (M32) boss (F38?) just asked me to go on a vacation with her. Should I go on this trip?

r/

My boss has always been terrible at separating work from personal life. Mostly because her work is her life. She does a lot of happy hours and dinners with our team and is very friendly with everyone.

Today she and I had my 1-on-1 and she asked if I would go to Mexico with her. Fully paid by the company(she owns), but clearly not for work as we don’t have any business there. I was caught so off guard that I didn’t know what to say and said I would think about it.

I don’t think she is into me as she has had an on and off boyfriend for a couple years. She said I’d have my own room and she just wanted to treat me to a trip and thinks we would enjoy the time together. This was all said without any hint of flirting or anything.

I’m not really sure what to think or do about this. She is a great boss and honestly I think its completely innocent. I really like my job and would enjoy a paid trip to be honest. What should I do here?

Comments

  1. ThyOughtTo Avatar

    Brother. Oh brother.

    “She invited me to Mexico with her[….] Without any hint of flirting or anything”

    Brotheeeer

    I say, if you want to, Go. You’ll get vacation, sex and an experience.

  2. Bill37nyc Avatar

    Say yes and go, have fun

  3. TryinNotToGetBanned Avatar

    Bro… Even if she isn’t trying to get with you or anything, GO ENJOY THE FREE TRIP!!

  4. Wonderful_Meat5604 Avatar

    Heck yes!!!! Start packing!!!

  5. One-Yard9754 Avatar

    So next time a friend or family member asks you how you got your new promotion you can say, ‘well I took a trip down to Mexico with my boss for a week and yada yada I got a big promotion’

  6. ThatGuyWired Avatar

    What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico.

  7. chrashedhardonce Avatar

    If this was real …

  8. goredd2000 Avatar

    Never get involved with the boss unless you’re prepared to look for a new job. A drink or two and it can get messy.

  9. hd8383 Avatar

    You like your job and like your boss (at work).

    So you really want to take the chance and F all that up? Think of the countless things that could go wrong on a trip to Mexico. All risk, no reward.

  10. thakingD Avatar

    Yolo it and go. Please update us when you get back. Good luck brother!

  11. Diligent-Rock6945 Avatar

    She probably wants a male companion for safety. She not into you.

  12. Dizzy_Signature_2145 Avatar

    Don’t  She is your boss.  Don’t mix things up. 

  13. grc207 Avatar

    Don’t dip your pen in company ink. Ever. It’s that simple.

  14. Cheap-Insurance-1338 Avatar

    Why is this even being questioned?

  15. Dangerous-Golf6066 Avatar

    Look…. You’re still fairly young and you won’t get this kind of opportunity again at 50 years old. Take it and if things turn out right she will give you bonuses possibly. This is outside of work so it’s not company’s time… but then again she owns the company! Take it and enjoy it

  16. StarsBear75063 Avatar

    Never shit where you eat. Just sayin’. 😐

  17. Camgore Avatar

    “Just got back from Jamaica. Tan almost everywhere, Jan almost everywhere”

  18. DrakeLevi444 Avatar

    Are you Michael Scott from the Office? Is your boss Jan Levinson

  19. writing_mm_romance Avatar

    How are you 32 and this naive, unless this is a shit post.

  20. stevepeds Avatar

    If you are not already committed to another, then strongly consider it, but before you do, think about the repercussions if you do get romantic and that romance eventually ends. What kind of job market exists that you could move into if you have to leave this job.

  21. aircowder67 Avatar

    If you are not getting any sex from her, there are plenty of gorgeous latinas around. Hell yeah I would go!!

  22. RainbowandHoneybee Avatar

    Seriously, if you value your integrity, you would say no. I don’t really know what her true intention may be, but going on a holiday with a boss, it gives people certain impressions.

    It’s totally up to you. But remember, no one knows what happened. And no one thinks nothing happened.

  23. ProfessionalYam3119 Avatar

    If you go, you’ll know that you have the same trouble as Boss does.

  24. Working-Tax-2439 Avatar

    I’d go and play it by ear. Could be a lovely vacation with a friend. Could be a sex filled vacation with a new lover. Could blow up. If the communication is there it can be navigated. Just remember you can’t really ghost her.

  25. Soggy-Beach-1495 Avatar

    I’m surprised nobody has mentioned the most obvious thing to you. She is inviting you to legitimize this as a “work” trip in front of the IRS. If the IRS audits her, you will be a witness. Think about that carefully.

  26. GAMERofdaTHRONES Avatar

    I would go. Enjoy your trip

  27. Sea_Daikon7718 Avatar

    Don’t ever mixed personal and work life, if I were you I’d decline unless, you also like her and is prepared to look for different job later on when things get serious

  28. Goonie-Googoo- Avatar

    Hmmm…

    >WorkingAtTheOffice

    >0 d
    Reddit Age

  29. AdAlternative8746 Avatar

    Why wait until vacation. Start sex tonight! What could go wrong? Everything! A real lose lose situation.

  30. dachaotic1 Avatar

    Tan almost everywhere, Jan almost everywhere, hee hee

  31. Flynn_JM Avatar

    Ask around and see if she has given this type of thing as a bonus to any other employees.

  32. RobertBDwyer Avatar

    Just take what comes with a chuckle and the worst you can do is some bad sex and a free vacation. Maybe the sex will be spectacular. Who cares? Be safe and have fun.

  33. eggrally Avatar

    Looks like she want to be your sugar mama

  34. Pure-Necessary-1510 Avatar

    Has she every taken anyone else on holiday before? Will it be a thing that everyone is aware of and will also have a chance in the future? If so go for it, maybe she just wants someone to hang out with.

  35. MissHibernia Avatar

    So a scenario would be if she knocks on your door and you turn her down. How would that play out for your actual work, you know, where you get paychecks to support yourself and pay your rent?

  36. 40ozSmasher Avatar

    What do you think she gets from paying for your vacation?

  37. RainInTheWoods Avatar

    I want the update on this.

  38. 1290_money Avatar

    So I would probably go but just remember this, it may cost you your job lol.

    Mixing business and pleasure is always a risky proposition. If things go great you might get a promotion and own the company at some point ha ha

    If things go badly then you might end up looking for a job at the end of the vacation.

    That being said I’d say go for it what the heck!

  39. melody_rhymes Avatar

    If you don’t care about the job and welcome the free sex, then yes. Otherwise, say no.

    Please remember: nothing in this life is free. So if this goes horribly wrong, don’t come back here complaining and asking what to do.

  40. Healthy-Term-4839 Avatar

    You need to say yes, other wise you will unemployed soon 😉 .

  41. brewhaha1776 Avatar

    Wylie probably should go just have fun man.

  42. melody_rhymes Avatar

    This is a shit post

  43. TurkishLanding Avatar

    Yes, but if you have reservations about this being non-platonic, ask her how she’d feel if you invited your partner to come too (who would pay their own way). Read the reaction.

  44. meekonesfade Avatar

    Ugh. My only question would be how do I get out of this gracefully. Maybe your grandma is dying and you cant take the chance of being far away at such a tenuous time?

  45. Aesop557 Avatar

    💯 No. This could be a set up – don’t know what sort of setup but this sounds fishy as f

  46. Tee1up Avatar

    Ummm, we will need her picture posted here to give you a full and accurate assessment of this situation. Otherwise, perform well and come home a (richer) man.

  47. ScotVonGaz Avatar

    Do it and enjoy it.

    Whatever happens will happen and when you are an old man, you’ll look back and remember you used to be adventurous. It’s just life, don’t take it so seriously

  48. LovedAJackass Avatar

    The trip off IS the flirting, genius.

  49. ghost_of_agrippa Avatar

    Didn’t see anyone else asking, but do you have a girlfriend or a wife?

    If so, you should not go. If not, you should go. Simple as that. 

    Also, if she wants to fuck, and you’re into it: just do it and enjoy yourself man. Life is too short to get caught up in feelings when you don’t have to. 

    Sometimes sex is just sex. Ain’t gotta be nothin more than that.

  50. Marine_1345 Avatar

    Oh I’m definitely going to

  51. PromiseToBeNiceToYou Avatar

    This is not innocent you dumbo. If you have any sense of values and morals you will turn her down and find new employment.

    If she was taking an entire team of say 10 people to Mexico, that would be fine. This isn’t not that. This is a booty call trip.

  52. OkIron6206 Avatar

    No, don’t go. It’s not going to work out in the end and she may get fired.

  53. texaslawyer79 Avatar

    We need pictures of her

  54. hvlochs Avatar

    Unless you have a significant other, go for it. I’ve been on business trips to resort type places just me and a female colleague and it was an awesome, platonic time.

  55. stryph007 Avatar

    Yeah, I get women asking me to go to Mexico all the time, all platonic and everything. 🤦‍♂️

  56. AffectionatePool3276 Avatar

    Sounds like you’re the only that doesn’t think sex is on the table. But hey, if you get along that well with her that you can just enjoy each others company go have fun.

  57. ProfessionalPanic960 Avatar

    Not clear from your note whether you will be using your vacation time in joining her or she intends to treat it as your work time. If the former, then certainly she has other intentions.

  58. changelingcd Avatar

    Assuming you won’t be too devastated if you lose that job, I’d go ahead and play it by ear.

  59. boringcranberry Avatar

    I am a woman and I had a direct report who was a dude and also a very good friend. We were both from NYC and we both moved to SF a few years apart. I was his manager in both cities.

    We spent nearly every weekend together exploring California. When my mom purchased a house in Palm Springs, he came with me to hang out for a weekend.

    There were absolutely zero romantic feelings. We just really got along and liked to do the same stuff.

  60. Flightwise Avatar

    You have obligations like a birthday party or wedding during the planned time away. But you are grateful for the consideration. Separate rooms? What else would you expect her to say straight off the bat? You could always then be invited to her room for pre dinner drinks at your peril.

    The optics are so bad, my friend. Extricate yourself with politeness and self respect.

  61. ElegantAmphibian4252 Avatar

    Everyone saying have sex with your boss is crazy. That could get ALL kinds of crazy and you may end up losing your job.

  62. osmqn150 Avatar

    Oh it’s that.

  63. Bleacherblonde Avatar

    If she hasn’t given you any reason not to trust her, then trust her. It sounds like she really just wants to do something nice for you. Go for it. If not, lmk and I’ll come work for her and take a free Mexico trip!

  64. LizzieBuzzy Avatar

    Nah, don’t do it! Too akward!

  65. CompetitiveEnd4804 Avatar

    If you don’t go on this trip your a fool haha relationship building or not its a free trip and new experience. Shit I wish I was invited on a trip

  66. Subject-Divide-5977 Avatar

    I personally miss so much with flirting. My wife tells me, you know she was flirting with you. What. I never saw it. I am not autistic and have lots of empathy. I miss seeing flirting, maybe because it doesn’t interest me. If you also are like me, you might be missing the hints and tips that are being sent. If you are single and up for a bit on the side, then go for it and see what happens, if you are in a relationship or find a bit on the side distasteful, you might just cruel a friendship. Your decision anyway. We don’t know your thoughts or those of your boss.

  67. Neither_Loan6419 Avatar

    Once out of sight and earshot of the office, anything could happen. You don’t KNOW what she wants, only what she says she wants. If you go, you are sort of in her control and on her turf. You might be expected to go to pound town with her. OTOH you might be expected to behave yourself. You need to be able to synchronize with her and if you reject her advances, or assume too much and make advances of your own, it will negatively affect your job. If you hook up, then it’s on her terms and you are not the alpha in the relationship.

    Her desire for a male companion might be totally innocent. She might just want you along to help her fend off unwanted advances, especially if she is kinda hot and gets irritated by every swinging weiner twitching her way and every would-be Romeo bombarding her with stupid pickup lines. But the dirty old man within me says she wants to jump your bones. That guy has almost got me killed a couple of times but sometimes he hits the mark true and square.

    If you like your job just the way it is, don’t go. If you are okay with throwing the dice, then go, put your bet out there, and see what it gets you. You can always get another job. Actually you can always get another GF or another one night stand, too, for that matter. But I promise you, if you go, things probably will change. Maybe for better, maybe for worse.

  68. mhills77 Avatar

    If you decide to go, be ready with your response in case she does hit on you. If you reject her advances, there may be fallout.

  69. prb65 Avatar

    Are you married or have a SO? If so then the answer is no. If not then I would go and enjoy the time, get to know her better and see how innocent it is. You can always say no to anything sexual and record those conversations to protect yourself. You might become really good friends and get a free vacation.

  70. National_Ad_682 Avatar

    “Thank you so much for the invitation, but I won’t be able to make it.”

  71. ecommercenewb Avatar

    if the roles were reversed, the ppl on this sub would prollyyyyy be singing a completely diff tune hahahahaha butttt nobody likes a sourpuss so…. GO DUDE!

  72. Low-Carob9772 Avatar

    Give her what she wants and then ask for a raise when you get home…

  73. ComfortableOk619 Avatar

    Don’t do it, this could blow up in your face!

  74. Realistic_Pride4846 Avatar

    Go. But make sure you eat that thang and pound it right

  75. Apprehensive-Cat2527 Avatar

    I think this is innocent. Just go on the trip and enjoy yourself, try to come up with some fun friendly surprise for her as well to return the favor.

    There are a lot of nice people without agendas in this world.

  76. Maronita2025 Avatar

    When you’re off work with people in your company you really are not off work!  I would say this is particularly true if the person wanting you to go is the owner of the company you work for.

  77. JealousRide5095 Avatar

    Expect to lose your job if your dick fails you.

  78. ChIpOfRiTo Avatar

    Bangboss instead of bangbus

  79. Due-Pirate-2431 Avatar

    Is it like that or not? Just fucking go and find out. It sounds like she’ll be able to handle it regardless. It’s another story if you can’t

  80. margifly Avatar

    Make sure you treat her kindly, open the door for her, grab her a towel, rub on the tan lotion and by the end of the trip you both will be exhausted.

  81. MommaIsMad Avatar

    An HR nightmare waiting to happen. You go on business trips with your boss. You don’t go on vacation with them.

  82. Fem-Picasso Avatar

    Wierd. Keep it strictly business & don’t accept.

  83. Jewblaga Avatar

    I’d go if I was single for sure, I could really use a free vacation lol. But if I was in a relationship I couldn’t go and disrespect my partner.

  84. Lilac-Roses-Sunsets Avatar

    NO. Just NO.

    She is not a friend. She is your boss. She will always be your boss. Keep her at arms length unless you can get another job immediately. Things could go south real quick. She could make a pass at you and then what are you going to do? Have sex with her? Then what? You are still her employee. If she pays then you OWE her. Maybe not with sex but hey OP I need you to work late because I PAID for your “vacation “. Or Sorry OP no RAISE for you because I paid for your “vacation”.

    Again NO.

  85. IntentionUsed8474 Avatar

    If you’re single, go to Mexico!
    Enjoy a free vacation, and hopefully, your bosses body every night

  86. Sirglogg Avatar

    Go and get her pregnant. Then it will be your company to.

  87. Voc1Vic2 Avatar

    If you perform well on this vacation, there may be a lot more out of town travel with your boss in future.

  88. Pen-dulge2025 Avatar

    I’ll go if you don’t

  89. outsideredge Avatar

    Go. Don’t think. Just go.

  90. FirefighterVisual863 Avatar

    She wants to fuck you. Take it, I’d say.

  91. GroundbreakingAd5060 Avatar

    Go bang the shit outta her bro

  92. sluttyman69 Avatar

    Go enjoy just don’t pressure for sex, but if she wants it, make sure an overperformed

  93. RSQ26 Avatar

    Maybe she doesn’t wanna travel alone. Go. Have fun. Don’t fuc* !

  94. dick_tator88 Avatar

    Are you attracted to her? That’s a real question you have to ask yourself. Then you need to ask if you’d be willing to risk your career over that attraction. Answer those two things and you’ll have your answer.

  95. AwkwardlyCunning Avatar

    This was my favorite episode of The Office…

  96. Rookietothegame Avatar

    I find this interesting and wonder how would it play out if the genders were swapped. Would there be a lot of female redditors calling the boss a creep and get HR involved? 🤔🤔

  97. Empty_Bowler_3907 Avatar

    Go man. Maybe she jumps your bones, maybe she doesn’t. Either way, free trip.

  98. Old_Suggestions Avatar

    I would but I’m also known to make terrible decisions.

  99. yankiehill Avatar

    Don’t go to a Coldplay concert

  100. SCRUBLIFE88 Avatar

    She’s 38. At this age, they know exactly what they want.. She’s tryna fuhhhhhq

  101. StnMtn_ Avatar

    If I was single. YOLO.

  102. Existing_Guard9742 Avatar

    You may think it’s innocent.

    She may say it’s innocent.

    How do you explain this to other management and coworkers? How would you explain to your fellow coworkers why you were invited and they weren’t? What makes you so special?

    Oh, the water fountain gossip will be so juicy. Would love to be a fly on the wall.

    No one will look at you or work with you the same ever again. Might want to brush up that resume. And practice how you’ll explain this favoritism to potential employers AND anyone from the company you’d want as a reference (if you could trust anyone to give a glowing reference after this 1:1 getaway to Mexico).

    updateme

  103. Traffic_Alert_God Avatar

    “Tan everywhere. Jan everywhere. So Jan and I went to Jamaica”.

    -Michael Scott

  104. putsovercalls Avatar

    If you dont go and dont update us….

  105. EightyFirstWolf Avatar

    Do you want to go to Mexico? It’s just a job. Life is supposed to be fun

  106. Pure_Minute2100 Avatar

    I have a friend who hates to traveling alone, she gets lonely, her families all dead, and her ex is a asswipe

  107. NY2Evia Avatar

    Go on the free vacation and have a great time. Just be prepared to lay down the pipe because she absolutely is DTF.

  108. Aggravating-Bell-113 Avatar

    These things have never happened to me. Also never had a hot step-mom. Why has fate been so cruel to me

  109. YOGAFIYAAA Avatar

    Deciding factor: is she hot?

  110. Low-Instruction-8132 Avatar

    Sounds like she sold one of your kidneys!

  111. theins16 Avatar

    You’re kind of hooped either way now.

  112. Adorable_Reporter804 Avatar

    If you value your reputation in the industry, tell her no.

  113. LazyAd622 Avatar

    If you really like your job and would enjoy a paid trip, you should NOT go on a vacation with your boss and you should pay for your own trip to go anywhere you like.

    DON’T MESS AROUND WITH YOUR BOSS WHO OWNS THE COMPANY YOU WORK FOR or you won’t be working there much longer.

  114. heartoftheparty Avatar

    I volunteer as tribute. I will take this trip in your place. No need to thank me. I know getting a free trip is a burden and a free room and free food and free drinks is just awful. I sympathize with you.