My husband 34M was recently admitted to the hospital. I immediately let his family know what was going on. From the moment his mother arrived at the hospital I felt like she was doing too much. She was hovering around him, talking to him while he was trying to rest and sleep, basically force feeding him with a spoon even though he told her he wasn’t hungry. Doing all the things I 31F as his wife would like to do for him. She stayed for seven hours the day he was admitted so we were together a long time. I had taken about all I could when his mother was like let me know if you need to go to the Bathroom and I snapped and yelled “I GOT IT!” I tried to roll it back and play it off as being overly exhausted. She kissed him on the lips before she left and I bit my tongue. She came back today which is day two of my husband being in the hospital and as soon as she got here pulled her chair up right beside his bed pestering him about eating and getting up and moving around like I’m incompetent or something and haven’t already been taking care of him. Idk if I’m overreacting or not but I told my husband when he recovers we’re going to have to set some boundaries with his mom.
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Does your husband even want her there? I feel like if my MIL was behaving like that while my husband was in the hospital it would drive him crazy, enough so that he would thank me for getting her out of there.🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️
An option you have is to speak to the nursing staff as they are used to managing family issues.
I guess it depends on whether your husband wants her there. If he does, let it be — she’s being a mom. Moms worry. The lip kiss is the only weird thing here if she’s otherwise a reasonable person.
Note that I said reasonable person — if you two have an otherwise good relationship with her, then yes, you’re overreacting. If she’s normally a JNMIL, and your husband doesn’t want her there, then it’s weird. You can address it with the nursing staff, they’ll be the bad guys and tell her to leave.
You’re going to have to step up and be firm. If you truly believe he doesn’t want her there doing all that, but he can’t speak up either physically or because he’s vulnerable and doesn’t have the will, THAT is where you take over as his wife. YOU are his advocate; for his doctors, nurses, and his family. Your only concern is making sure he’s comfortable and well taken care of. Period. It doesn’t matter if mommy’s feelings are hurt.
Like others have said: get the nurses involved.
You need to tell her to leave. Now.