My mom ask if how she or what she should do.
So she said when i see u i just cant handle how i miseducated and “ruined” you into be a successful autonomous person.
I told her to ask a therapist but she said they never answer or directly tell her.
My mom ask
r/Advice
Comments
Sounds like your Mom has some serious issues. She has some sort of problem with her child being a successful autonomous person (which is the goal of most parents), which is incredibly unhealthy thinking for one, and cannot accept the help experts try to give her about these unhealthy thoughts, and misdirects the problem onto the therapists being the issue instead of her.
You can’t help someone that doesn’t want to be helped, and if she won’t listen to multiple therapists, and persists in what she must know is a strange and unhealthy thought process (being upset your child is successful and independent). So I would recommend setting firm boundaries in your relationship with you, and only allowing what you are okay with in your relationship. If it were me, I would tell her to stop saying this to you, as it is directing some kind of guilt to you for achieving the best possible things a mother could want. If she cannot maintain these boundaries, you’ll have to go from there, and disengage more and more.
Unless of course she is teasing in which case, my advice would be let her know you don’t like it when she teases like that, and if she doesn’t stop go to step 2.
Tell your mom that her mindset is corrupted and that she should be proud that you can stand by yourself not upset. She shouldn’t be asking such weird negative nonsense. I don’t know what culture you mom comes from but change is something you should embrace not disgrace. Tell me if this helped at all though and I’ll be here if you have any questions! You got this stand strong!
What? Ask her what she intended for you to be? A bum, a worthless, mindless human being, a weak and timid person? I need answers.
You can love her from a distance.
Good luck and many blessings