trigger warning talks of nicotine addiction, cancer and verbal abuse.
Today I Jay (m23) ate dinner with my mom and dad, they love to watch TV shows while they eat dinner together and I usually watch something on my phone. Shout out to Smosh and THT I love you guys y’all keep me joyful in these trying times
Todays selection was my 500 lb life. One of the stars was visit a doctor to check her availability to get a excess skin removal surgery and one of the doctors concerns about her getting the surgery was her habit of vaping.
My mom knowing that I have fought with my nicotine addiction since I was 17, took the opportunity of a doctor on tv saying that vaping can cause healing and health complications as a moment to make it know that it is bad for me.
I told her yes I’m aware and I asked her to stop the conversation since I was just trying to enjoy my food. She continued and said “Well if you know then why don’t you stop?” I started to explain my addiction and chemical dependency, but half way through my explanation my mom said “well you can go get cancer and die then,” and turned back to her show. I was stunned and I couldn’t even bring myself to say anything. I simply just threw my food away and left.
I’m now sitting in my room trying to just understand what I’m feeling. I’m not sure if I should express my feelings to her or just let it go. I’ve prewritten everything I’d want to say down, but I need help. What would you do if you were in my position? Anything is helpful.
[Edit: I am currently seeing a therapist who specializes in addiction recovery, both my parents are also aware of this as I used to talk to them about my sessions frequently.]
Info: Cancer runs on both sides of my family, and we have had family members survive and pass due to this disease.
Comments
Backup of the post’s body: trigger warning talks of nicotine addiction, cancer and verbal abuse.
Today I Jay (m23) ate dinner with my mom and dad, they love to watch TV shows while they eat dinner together and I usually watch something on my phone. Shout out to Smosh and THT I love you guys y’all keep me joyful in these trying times
Todays selection was my 500 lb life. One of the stars was visit a doctor to check her availability to get a excess skin removal surgery and one of the doctors concerns about her getting the surgery was her habit of vaping.
My mom knowing that I have fought with my nicotine addiction since I was 17, took the opportunity of a doctor on tv saying that vaping can cause healing and health complications as a moment to make it know that it is bad for me.
I told her yes I’m aware and I asked her to stop the conversation since I was just trying to enjoy my food. She continued and said “Well if you know then why don’t you stop?” I started to explain my addiction and chemical dependency, but half way through my explanation my mom said “well you can go get cancer and die then,” and turned back to her show. I was stunned and I couldn’t even bring myself to say anything. I simply just threw my food away and left.
I’m now sitting in my room trying to just understand what I’m feeling. I’m not sure if I should express my feelings to or just let it go. I’ve prewritten everything I’d want to say down, but I need help. What would you do if you were in my position? Anything is helpful.
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Get a thick skin..inform your mind that you need to be addict free and go to doctors and take their help.
She’s not wrong tho
Are you taking any steps to manage you addiction, or just making excuses and feeling bad for yourself.
Okay, this is awful, I am so sorry OP, your feelings are valid and your mum should never say that to you.
My mum hates that I vape, HATES IT. She hated me smoking and hates me vaping, but she just wouldn’t say that because it is downright mean.
Yes she asks me to quit and hey, I too want to quit but so far, the vape remains.
I think your mum may have been reacting badly due to her caring and maybe feeling dismissed by you trying to shut down the conversation but that is no excuse, she is the adult here.
Maybe from now on when she brings it up just say “yeah quitting is a good idea” then hopefully she can leave it at that, if her mean comments continue then just explain “mum I don’t want to talk about this with you as your comments hurt me”
My grandad (mums dad) died of COPD last year, he worked in a cotton mill for many years and also smoked cigars, my mum doesn’t even bring that up when we speak about my vaping because she just doesn’t want to hurt me, I am very grateful for how caring she is, I do believe my mum is an angel though due to her kind nature.
I don’t think you need to dwell on this too much, she said what she said to jab at you, don’t let her do that, move on from it and know you would never, ever say that to another human because you have basic common decency <3
I’m not sure what the other responders are seeing but that is 100% not cool of your mom to say. Is she always doing hurtful stuff?