I’m only 15, but I’m in an admittedly very adult situation and I need advice.
I had my son on July 4th, and my parents were not allowed or invited to be in the room with me. They kicked me out when I got pregnant, rejected my attempts to make amends, and ignored the sonograms and updates I sent her out of my own free will, and now she’s reaching out asking to see him. I don’t want her around him for a number of reasons, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to tell her. Truthfully, I want her to come, but I want to see a mom who isn’t her. I want a mom who’ll come over and love and support us, and she either can’t or won’t do that. I don’t know how to stick up for my baby and I, and I wish I didn’t have to. I’m so hurt by everything she does.
Comments
She abandoned you when you needed a mother most and now she doesn’t get to waltz in just because the baby’s here. Protecting your son means choosing stability over sentiment even if it breaks your heart.
She sounds very selfish. My only advice would be to soften exactly what you’ve written here and tell her. Then she has the choice to meet you where you want to be met or be left from the child’s life. If she changes, great, everyone wins. If she doesn’t, you get to move forward without regrets, because you gave her a shot.
First i want to say I am sorry and feel your pain. You should have and deserve to have had parents that loved and cherished you. As a Dad it breaks my heart, a daughter is someone special that should be loved, cherished and supported. I will be thinking of you and your son. I hope you find in your son the love that you missed growing up. A bond between Mother and child is special, shower him with love and he will return it. You did not have the childhood you should have but you can be the first in your new family to show them how it is done. The head female in a family tree is called a matriarch. A matriarch is a female head of a family, tribe, or group, often the oldest or most influential woman. You can be that woman. Be the Matriarch.
May you have a happy life that you choose.
Don’t do it
I’m so sorry that you have a mother like that. They could only be stepping in for the status/information on you to be able to spread it through the family. I would not trust your parents at all. On the other hand, I can’t imagine how you feel amongst just this alone. You are going to make it through this. You can do it and you’re not alone! Even if you have one person, even if it becomes just your kid at some point. Life is hard.