So, my neighbor (68) has been a family friend since before I (16) was born. For about 8 years, my mother(47) has been friends with him, but recently she has gotten too close to him. About a year or 2 ago I caught them kissing…twice. Yesterday I went through her phone and found them sending texts saying “I love you” and talking about things they do together. I wouldn’t care but he’s old enough to be her father, and he’s married. His wife is bound to a chair, barely able to walk to the door. She has no clue what’s going on. My mother helps to take care of her and their dog. I live with my mom and grandparents, is there anything I could do about this?
My neighbor’s cheating on his wife with my mom
r/Advice
Comments
that’s insane… yeah i caught that age gap real quick too.
honestly i think there are two things you can do: one, stay silent and let it happen. or two, you can walk over there and tell his wife what’s going on. with proof, of course.
do i particularly condone either one? not really?? it’s not your fault that this is happening and it’s so stupid that it’s left to you to deal with it. i think if it were me, i would tell his wife. but that’s my personal prerogative. just make sure he doesn’t try to cross any boundaries with you and your home.
you should confront your mom first.
Let them enjoy
This is a rough situation, and none of your options are great. I think the safest option for you, would be to keep quiet about it. However, that’s also really difficult because what they’re doing is extremely wrong and awful for your neighbor’s wife. I think you’re gonna have to decide what the better outcome is for you based on your mom and your situation. Would your mom make your life a living hell if you told? Would the guilt be worse if you were quiet? The wife might have given your neighbor an open marriage, for all you know. There’s a lot to think about here and my best advice for you would be to avoid rushing into anything. Think out what you are going to do and come up with a plan for all the possible repercussions. If I were in your shoes, I probably would confront my mom first. However, that might not be the best option for you.
Always expose infidelity. Make copies of the proof and let it be known.
It really isn’t any of your business what other people get up to.
Please tell his wife. He is putting her health at risk. Your mom is disrespectful and deserves to be called out.
Yes … mind your own business. They’re adults
Maybe before saying anything to the wife- and potentially crushing her soul- ask the cheating husband if there’s any good reason you shouldn’t tell her… Gauging his reaction and response would add some information to your decision making process.
Alternatively, you could first ask your mom if there’s any reason you shouldn’t talk to the cheating husband, and see what her reaction is.
Is your mom single, or also cheating?
Finally- I do not think you are morally obligated to involve yourself, but I also don’t think you’re in the wrong if you do. Cheaters and liars don’t respect the feelings of others, so I don’t respect theirs. I do respect the victims’ though. Tough situation you’re in. Sorry.
You went through your mom’s phone and now running to Reddit for advice? You need friends and a life.
It’s none of your business. As long as your father is not around.
Document everything you found. You can either tell his wife, confront your mother or show your grandparents, take a pick
Mind your own business.
The question is do you have a father? If you can live with him it’s a good chance because what your mother is doing is very low. If you don’t see if you have any relatives to stay with, focus on your studies so you can get into a university and leave from there.
Stay out of it. They are both consenting adults and it’s none of your business. Plus, with an older wheelchair bound wife, maybe she is OK with it. There are lots of people that live in open relationships. There are also couple that grow apart and yet stay together because it is familiar/financially beneficial. Who knows. You don’t know what’s happening between them and really shouldn’t care as long as your mother is happy, which it seems she is since she is in love with him.
The main thing you should do is mind your own business and stop snooping on her phone.
If you can do that, then discuss with your mom first and tell her you’re concerned but it’s her life and you just wanted to make sure she knows you care…then let it go.
Is your mom happy?
Do you want her happy.
No conclusions here, just think that is something to consider