My sister (18f) hid her pregnancy and just gave birth 24 hrs ago..

r/

This has been such a roller coaster of emotions and situations all packed into 24-36 hours. My (24f) younger sister hid her pregnancy, pretended she didn’t know, and when we found out she did her lies started to unravel causing massive drama between her and my parents. (I think it’s the wrong time to care about this but sleep deprivation has a way of making people crazy). The baby is in the NICU fighting for her life and I am devastated for my sister and my niece. I don’t even know what to do if the baby doesn’t make it. I guess I’m wondering if anyone has experienced a similar situation and/or can give advice for what to do for my sister if the baby dies. This is the craziest thing I’ve ever been through and I feel like I don’t know what to do besides be there for her when I can (I work and go to college).

Comments

  1. bubblesincollege Avatar

    I’m so sorry you’re in this nightmare. I’d just stay by her side and listen without judging so she doesn’t have to face any of this alone.

  2. SourMads Avatar

    Lies in a crisis feel like betrayal but right now they don’t matter because survival does. If the worst happens your sister won’t need lectures she’ll need someone who can sit in the dark with her until the light creeps back in.

  3. eitherrideordie Avatar

    If possible try to all get some rest where you can, sleep deprivation can really change resilliancy on getting through things.

    I know there is a lot of stuff to deal with. but a lot can be done later, as others noted right now maybe just tell her your there if she needs and can talk to etc. The drama can be revisited later.

    Also if possible try to make sure there is a professional (like a therapist) you can provide if she needs one. I can’t say I know the full picture, but if some of this feels abnormal to how you think your sister would typically behave there could be a variety of reasons from that including pregnancy hormones, and other things that come from being pregnant. Things that might require someone like that.

  4. Trolling4Chaulk Avatar

    Whats the gestation and weight of the baby?

  5. Mysterious_Sea_6756 Avatar

    I’m sorry your family is going through this difficult time. At this point, I would say just try to be there for your sister. You don’t have to necessarily say anything profound. Be there, hug her, sit with her, let her cry, you cry. With your niece being in the NICU, the hospital will hopefully have a social worker connected to your niece. They should be able to assist with helping explaining next steps, connecting your sister with referrals as well.

  6. Silver_Sky00 Avatar

    I hope your sister and the baby are going to be okay.

    There’s a whole TV show called “I didn’t know I was pregnant, ” it’s an interesting show.

    Whatever happened, I hope everyone is kind and supportive and patient, to both her and the baby.

  7. GullibleWealth750 Avatar

    However bad you are feeling right now, your sister feels 100x worse. Hiding her pregnancy wasn’t done out of deceit. Imagine suffering in silence for the better part of a year. She needs you right now, not lectures, not judgement. She needs your loving presence, no strings.