We got a golden retriever 13 years ago when my son was 4. My son never got bored with him. Our dog started to have health issues and it got to the point where he started to have seizures and suffered from dehydration. This asshole vet said our dog could live a few more years if we got him a kidney transplant. I didn’t even ask how much let alone how incredibly selfish that was. Our dog is 89 years old in human years. It’s time to let go.
My son says we should do everything to save our dog’s life and to get a loan to pay for it. I couldn’t reason with his logic. Last night was my breaking point when the dog couldn’t even stand up. He just sat there. As soon as my son went to school,I took the dog to be put to sleep. I was there the whole time and he wasn’t alone. That dog was spoiled as his life. He wouldn’t drink water unless it was bottled and opened it in front of him.
My son came home and I lied. I said the dog had a massive seizure and died before we got to the vet. I hadn’t seen him cry since he was 10. Thank God I did what I did because I couldn’t take one more minute of my son being emotional.
Comments
It’s a pity some people have kids
You did the right thing! Poor dog needed a rest and you son needed that lie.
What you did with the dog, I actually think that’s fine. Honestly, it sounds like it was the merciful thing for the dog. Lying to your son? Sure, that’s complicated, but I get it. But that last sentence? That’s horrific.
Why have a human if you don’t want them to have human emotions? It’s one thing to not want to be a parent, but to choose to be one and then resent your kid for feeling human emotions? That’s insane. It honestly sounds like you’re dealing with some kind of sociopathic detachment because who watches someone they supposedly love cry over the death of basically a family member and have THAT reaction
Poor kid. I genuinely hope this is a troll post, because if not… I can’t imagine what other ways you’ve hurt him with this kind of thinking. This is terrifying.
You did the right thing, but you did it for the wrong reasons. Maybe you should reflect on that.
You sound like an awful person and horrible parent.
May your son have as much patience and empathy for you in your old age.
Your son is allowed to be emotional. YTA. Oh wait, wrong sub
Clickbait ass title made it sound like you put down a healthy animal because your kid threw a tantrum. Nothing wrong with euthanized a dog with kidney failure but you’re wrong for lying to the kid.
I thought by the title you would be a piece of shit.
Nah man, what you did was reasonable. Poor dog, and poor kid. Tell him the truth some years later. However, your wording suggests you were spiteful towards the kid, but your tale was because the dog was suffering.
Next time work on your wording.
I am speaking as a vet tech, what you did was the most humane thing that you could have done for that dog.
We have so many dogs coming in with so many severe ailments, all of those just knocking on deaths door, but their owners just can’t let go. Or the ones that do come in for euthanasia that should have come in for it a long, long time ago. You know, it gets to the point where you have to start thinking for the animal and not for yourself and how you feel about losing your pet. Do you really want their last days with you to be painful? Or do you want them to still feel comfort and happiness with you, in their last moments?
You really have to start consider their quality of life over quantity.
You did the right thing. You did the HUMANE thing.
One way or another it’s going to come out and when it does it’s not going to be good. Every lie eventually comes out.
You kinda suck as a parent.
This is one of the most profoundly fucked up confessions I have ever read on this sub.
There are people walking around with lifelong childhood trauma from less.
Put this on r/amitheasshole
That’s horrific. You should have AT LEAST given your family a chance to be present for their 13++ year old family member to sleep. My mom took ALL of my childhood pets to be put down without me and it has fucked me up forever. The dog was suffering and it needed to end but fuck you, genuinely, for doing it the way you did. Your kid will remember this forever, and I don’t know how you can live with yourself for doing this AND LYING.
You did your son and great disservice but I’m glad your dog isn’t suffering anymore.
I think it’s really sad that you are so uncomfortable with your child having normal, human emotions. Seeing a beloved pet age and lose their bodily functions is one of the hardest things my family has ever gone through.
My daughter laid with her childhood dog as she was put to sleep and fed her shavings off a giant Hershey Kiss. It was absolutely gut wrenching seeing her hurt so much but I’m so glad she was able to say goodbye like that. Children are so wise and dogs are so precious. I imagine your son and dog had a strong connection, given how sad your son has been. Your son and dog both deserved to be together at the end.
I think you have enough insight to know what you did was wrong otherwise you wouldn’t post here. I would recommend therapy for you and your child. Good luck.
I work in specialty veterinary medicine, and work with who will be one of the first veterinary nephrologists.
What you did to the dog was a kindness; Kidney transplants are not common in veterinary medicine. This is not to say it’s impossible, but they are 1.) Extremely expensive (think $20,000-$30,000 USD minimum for surgery and immediate post surgical care, does NOT include follow up monitoring of renal values) and 2.) Unreasonable for a golden retriever of 13 with pre-existing renal disease. If your dog was 1 and had renal dysplasia, this would be different, if you could support the financial means.
13 is a fantastic age for a golden retriever. It’s clear he was loved very well, and very deeply. It was an act of compassion to cease the suffering of your dog.
However, the way executed was poor. Your son has every right to know the truth, and having a conversation about the severity of your dog’s condition from an empathetic standpoint may have been of more benefit. He will forever have some guilt about not being able to assist his beloved friend and pet into the next life, and that isn’t fair for him either.
So your son is 17?
Wonder if he reads reddit .
You might want to delete post…
You suck brother. Thanks for giving that dog a great life and doing the right thing, but boy oh boy do you suck brother.
I had to put my poor baby Sunny to sleep 3 years ago after 15 beautiful years. He couldn’t stand, refused to eat anymore, and was in pain. I killed me to see him like that. You did right by your son’s dog. Never doubt that. That pain of loss will never go but becomes manageable.
You forever took from your child his chance to say goodbye. And “I couldn’t take one more minute of my son being emotional.”
You. Disgust me.
You have no empathy for your son, or for your dog. Neither of which you deserve the love from. It’s wasted on you.
Fairly certain, that when women get the flyers telling them that when they get a cancer diagnosis, that their husband will leave them, it’s about people like you.
That last line carries so much weight. I don’t understand why someone would have a child and feel such a way. You haven’t seen him cry since he was 10? That means your son is well aware of your shortcomings.
What you did for the dog I can understand, but you need to parent up and be there for your child.
What you did was terrible to your son. He should have been there. I would never forgive you.
One of many reasons to raise your kids around farms and animals. My daughter is 7 but she completely understands the circle of life. We put down our elderly puggle last Fall and she was sad and missed him but I never had to lie to her about it. 🤷
You’re a real piece of work
I truly hope this post is rage bait/karma farming because.. if not, you’re a terrible person and you should never have had children. How can you not have empathy for your own child losing a lifelong friend? You should never have taken your dog to get euthanized behind your son’s back. Your son deserved closure, and to be there with his beloved dog during his last moments. You made the right decision euthanizing, but the entire situation was executed poorly. When your son inevitably finds out what you’ve done behind his back, he will resent you for it.
You did what you had to do. Thank you staying with the dog until the end. Too many people chicken out and leave their poor babies alone. Let him love the lie. It’s for the best
Gross. I hope this is fake because if not your vile.
u/Historical_Yam_6158 — I would like to ask a question for some clarifying context. Is English not your first language? If it is, then could you elaborate on your last sentence please? Trying not to further judge you unfairly here.
you’re a real looooserrr if you think your child having emotions is a bad thing lol. what an awful father
bro what
Your son is 17? That’s old enough to handle the truth.
I don’t understand why my adult child has gone no contact with me and refuses to talk to me. I was the perfect parent.
Start practicing that now.
I’m so sorry.
Death is a part of life and having empathy for the suffering of a pet is part of learning to be a responsible pet owner.
It was the right decision to put your pet to sleep: he was suffering, and since they can’t tell us we only have their symptoms to judge how much. No one has the money to pay for organ transplants for pets. That is not a reasonable expectation, and it’s not guaranteed to be worthwhile: It may worsen their suffering or they may have other things wrong. It’s hard to explain to a dog to leave the stitches alone.
I understand why you lied to your son: it was easier, and you were both hurting.
However, if I did the math correctly your son is 17. He’s one year or less from voting, being able to join the military, or get married. He will soon be able to sign contracts, ….. OR build up debt, such as organ transplants for dogs offered by irresponsible vets.
Your son needed this experience to have an opportunity to grow and learn about finances; to learn about death, and how it comes to us all. Dying is not the worst thing, suffering is. Especially suffering needlessly.
Maybe when it’s not so fresh, you can revisit this issue and help him understand the adult nuances. Even if you had gotten the organ transplant, he could have had a seizure. Elderly animals are still elderly, there is rarely only one thing wrong at that age similarly to people.
Your dog had a long life, it sounds like a well loved and spoiled life.
I’m sorry for your loss. I’m sorry your son being upset was upsetting on top of your loss.
I’m happy your fur baby is no longer in pain. It’s natural to grieve when they love us with a purity so fully, and they are our companions for over a decade.
I have two urns in my room where I cremated my cat Missy (she made it to a month before her 20th birthday), and our puppy Melvin (he lived for 14 years). Missy especially was hard for me, as I got her when I was 16 and she passed when I was 36. We went through a lot of life together.
I wish you and your son peace.
What is wrong with you? I was on your side until that last sentence. Your son is a human being. Actual humans have emotions. I’m not sure what you are, but it’s certainly not a decent person.
You had an opportunity to teach your child a lesson about making hard decisions. Gone to the vet and allowed the vet to explain that in that condition, it was the only option. And allowed your child to experience that loss and understand that sometimes we have to lose something when it’s time, even if it hurts us, because as pet owners it’s our responsibility to act on behalf of our pet’s best interests since they have no voice. You caused that emotionality in your child that could have been processed by being with their beloved pet while they peacefully slipped from the world. Instead they imagined their childhood dog dying from a seizure.
That last sentence paints you as a complete sociopath
You really should prepare yourself to be abandoned as soon as your son leaves your home. That last sentence is terrifying.
I mean this as earnestly and empathetically as possible, please seek therapy.
This is awful, I remember when we put our 18 yr old cat to sleep my mom desperately wanted to be there with him during the final moments since we’ve been there with our cat his whole life. I can’t imagine taking that away just because someone is “emotional.” I agree that it was the best choice to put the dog to sleep, but man…I’m glad you’re not my parent.
ASPD vibes
You can jump now
Jesus. We just had our beagle sent to peace and our 16yo daughter was there with her every second. Yes, the dog needed to be allowed to die and yes its OK to not be able to afford to extend his life. But jesus crust you lied to your kid about it and denied him the chance to say goodbye! What the fuck!
Everyone is telling you’re a terrible parent only because you clearly have neglected therapy after your parents failed you. Otherwise you wouldn’t be talking about your child like that. As a parent myself, I’m appalled that you have this mindset in 2025. You really need a hug and a good therapist.
The euthanasia sounds like it was the kindest thing for the dog but my God you are still callous as hell. That last sentence is just evil.
You suck as a parent.
I lost my cat, who I’ve had for 15 years, a week and a half ago. He was humanely euthanized because he developed lymphoma and, at 17 and a half years-old, it wouldn’t be right to put him through painful, invasive tests at his advanced age.
I’m 44, and you can bet your ass that I was very emotional about it. Frankly, I still am. My friends and family who absolutely adored him? Also very emotional over his passing. Grief is a very normal response.
I don’t fault you at all for trying to do well by the dog, but both lying to your son about the circumstances (and not giving him the opportunity to say goodbye!) and complaining because of his justifiably emotional reaction is super shitty. Getting upset about your son experiencing emotions when men and boys are told to not express them is both unhealthy and pretty shameful. It’s worth asking yourself why it bothers you so much.
Good intentions for the most shitty reasons, god for if your son shows emotion for something he loves like families. I feel sorry for the day when he looses a person he cherish, cause clearly seeing how emotionally immature you are your. going to make it horrible for him. Seriously op your sorry excuse for parents go fuck yourself
you’re a pathetic karma farmer with troll posts or you’re an asshole of a parent.
Yikes
Not sure the vet is an “asshole” here. Not everyone is ready to let their pets go even if they are old. Folks treat them like family. It might be the right thing to do to let them go when they’re so old, but it’s understandable someone might want to prolong their life as much as possible.
I do want to say, you gotta work on your wording. Because that last sentence can be easily construed to mean you couldn’t stand your son being emotional about the death of his beloved childhood pet which seems unusually cold. If you mean you couldn’t stand seeing your son in pain, you should reword it better.
What thr fuck did i just read & what sort of monster are you?
You have to be city people, your son is coddled and probly hasn’t been told bo before and has no concept of money. That’s your fault as parent for raising him that way. You di the right thing by the dog, but stop being such a pussy and raise your child
Fido had it coming
Your last sentence says way more than everything preceding it.
that last sentence.. yikes
What in the hell?!
>Thank God I did what I did because I couldn’t take one more minute of my son being emotional.
K but what the literal fuck
Your son is a human being with thoughts and feelings of his own. He’s grown up alongside this dog, of course he’s going to be sad. Have some empathy for your child.
You did the right thing for your dog but it was shitty to lie to your son about it.
I have to say too Jesus Christ that last sentence hangs in the air. Your son is what 17 and known that dog his whole life? Putting the dog down was a merciful thing but damn you should really evaluate your emotional response to your child. You chose to pull consciousness from the ether and now you can’t handle when it feels compassion and mourning for a creature that also probably feels like the symbolic death of his childhood?
What you did was a mercy.
Honestly I wasn’t even aware transplants are a thing in dogs. I can’t imagine the stress on the animal, for maybe a few months to years at best.
I’m sorry you had to lie to your son but I feel like it’s for the best I’m this situation.
Your son wasn’t difficult! He was emotional and it’s completely fine for a human to have feelings and show them! You sound like an asswhole the way you talk about your son!
Your son is allowed to have emotions. He’s a kid, of course he’d want his dog to live a little longer, they usually don’t understand how many issues the animal has and how much pain they’d be in. You sound like a toxic parent if you’re treating your sons emotions like its a nuisance, the last sentence made the dog’s euthanasia seem like a punishment to your son being heartbroken rather than ending your dogs suffering.
Fuck you for lying and for that last sentence, cunt.
I can understand putting the dog down as it was getting old, that’s fine, but that last sentence is extremely insensitive and makes me honestly wonder what you’re like as a parent. “Being emotional” over a dog dying? You sound horrible. It shows empathy and if anything I think it’s incredibly NORMAL to be upset when your pet dies.
Not to vent or anything but that last sentence reminded me of something similar my own mother had said directly to me when my own pet died when I was younger. My mother was extremely abusive and narcissistic. A recurring thing would be to get angry at me when I was little for responding to things the way I should have been at that age.
You can say I’m overreacting but that’s the vibe this person is giving me right now
You did the right thing but your reasoning is horrific. I feel bad for that kid having to grow up with a parent who doesn’t have any empathy. Do better.
No way this is real. If it is you have so many problems and you are printing them on your kids. Also, sorry to everyone else for taking the bait for whatever this is.
The hell is with that title and last sentence
Jesus Christ dude you sound like a complete nut job!! Yes, the dog was suffering and you did the most humane thing. But, what the fuck! I couldn’t take one more minute of my son being emotional?!?? You are the problem with emotions, not your son!!
What the hell….
Congrats on raising an anxious or avoidant child. I make this assumption entirely based on your last sentence, as after stating this I cannot fathom how you’ve even met those subtle needs he required as an infant when they affect relationship development.
The dog had to be put down, so that was a kindness. However, he should have been given the courtesy of being in the room as he shuffled off this mortal coil. Dogs can sense callousness. You were not comforting for that dog. That dog died… alone, even with you there.
You are an actual fucking psycho. That poor kid’s gonna grow up all fucked up with you as a parent
I’m thinking I read it wrong like “I’m so sad that my son has to suffer” if I give the benefit of the doubt. Otherwise this is horrible.
And in a few years you’ll be posting videos whining that you just don’t understand why your son no longer speaks to you. I hope you never get to meet your grandchildren.
Plot twist: The son now promises to only drink bottled water in solidarity with the dog
Go to the grave with the truth.
You are a cunt.
That’s actually really horrible of you – not wanting to deal with your sons emotions. I guess at least he knows how to be compassionate unlike you which is a saving grace.
A kidney transplant for a dog is not something that has been pushed by a vet ever nice made up story
You’re not the asshole. I don’t care what anyone else says.
On another point, the dog wasn’t 89 in human years, what the fuck does that even mean? It’s not a thing.
The dog was 13.
What kind of title is that?