My wife 23 F left me 24 M last night because of an argument we had. We were together for 5 years and just married this year. We are both leaving for Basic in August and needed someone to take care of our dog. We had no one and I wanted friends to take care of him while we were gone, she didn’t trust them and I didn’t trust her friends to take care of him. We yelled at each other. She left to another state last night to spend time with them until she leaves for BCT, which is around a week. She told me she wanted to take a break apart to see if she still wants to be in this marriage. She told me in the end she will still love me.
Its hard and I understand she just needs time to herself. I was immature, but I’m worried about her and thinking that she will want to get a divorce after everything. We will be spending 7 months apart.
What do I even do at this point? It feels like everything was stripped from me.
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Sounds like she’s looking for an excuse to brake up. Most likely knows she won’t stay faithful.
You enjoy your life. She’s telling you , y’all are not together anymore.
Go out with your friends and enjoy yourself while you doing it.
You’re both going into basic training? At the same place or different?
File the papers before you leave.
What is with people in the military getting married when they’re still kids?
Become an alcoholic
She’s got another dude
Uh, you’re married dude. It doesn’t work that way. There’s no “breaks” in marriage. You work on the problem together and get through it. Don’t mistake this with a cool down period. Like an argument, then take a day or two to regroup your emotions. But leaving for a week and saying it’s for a break over your dog…. Right…. Divorce her ass, quick. You’re going to be hurt more.
I was married for 4 years in an 8 year relationship, too. So this is from my experience.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. obviously we don’t know the full story, but I️ would apologize for yelling and anything wrong you did on your part. she may be overwhelmed with training and the future but I️ would reiterate your commitment to her and that you don’t want a silly fight over who is going to watch the dog to change your relationship
A fight this close to being about to leave each other may signify other issues that weren’t being discussed or even separation anxiety. I would focus less on the fact you fought and more on what you were saying to each other. Maybe there is something she just needs you to hear. Or even something you needed her to hear. I’m sorry this happened when you were about to leave. What awful stressful timing. I hope you are able to find some peace on it before August.
You should read some books about marriage and communication. Try “why marriages succeed and fail” by gottman.
Pro tip: don’t purposely do or say things that you know are going to hurt your spouse. Even if you are angry.
OP this has to be the weakest marriage I’ve seen so far. Whatever foundation you guys built in those 5 years is shit my friend. Either some serious work will need to be put in going forward or you all are in a collision course with reality. These issues are not even that bad compared to what life will throw at you later.